Intimacy: Today, my parents surprised me by redecorating my room. I think...

By A.Summers - 30/09/2013 22:41 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, my parents surprised me by redecorating my room. I think they were more surprised by the box of naughty toys under my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 052

You deserved it 11 497

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Same thing different taste

Welcome home

By SendHelpAndBleach - 15/06/2018 05:00

Today, I decided to surprise my parents who I haven’t seen in a while. They weren’t home, but I still have a key so I let myself in. When I went to my old room to put down my bags, I was greeted by a sex swing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 693

You deserved it 1 587

Thanks, Dad!

By Sam - 28/11/2008 08:50 - France

Today, my dad surprised me by moving my bed (involving disassembling and reassembling it) in my new room, because I couldn't find how I wanted to set it up. He also took care of putting back my vibrator between the mattress and the base, where it was hidden. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 572

You deserved it 11 314

By GoldenTornado11 - 10/05/2017 14:00

Today, I walked in on my parents having sex. In my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 138

You deserved it 559

By swtkiss1 - 18/02/2009 22:26 - United States

Today, my mom cleaned up my room. I had a drawer filled with condoms, 2 vibrators, and a bondage kit. She organized the condoms and vibrators in a shoe box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 917

You deserved it 58 638

By Anonymous - 30/12/2008 20:30 - France

Today, when I saw a big box that looked like a playstation, I got really excited and my parents were there and everything looked like it really was something big, so I start to open the wrapper and surprise... it was a lamp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 948

You deserved it 7 006

By mster233 - 09/10/2010 03:29 - United States

Today, I found out that my parents like rough sex. I found the whip and handcuffs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 341

You deserved it 5 828

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By Can't Unsee - 25/08/2018 22:00

Today, my mother found my sex toys. To make me "feel better" she showed me hers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 175

You deserved it 575

By Anonymous - 01/08/2019 09:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, I caught my parents having sex. It wouldn't have been as mortifying if they weren't doing it in my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 474

You deserved it 219

By ekaay - 16/01/2018 15:00

Today, whilst cleaning the living room, I heard snickering coming from my bedroom. My two nephews had found my "play cupboard" and were blowing up condoms like balloons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 047

You deserved it 1 003

By tawnaciousd - 10/09/2009 06:35 - United States

Today, my sister surprised me by cleaning my room and doing my laundry. She found my journal, condoms and vibrator and decided to share her findings with my family. Oh yes... she also shrunk half my wardrobe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 153

You deserved it 5 060

penguin182 18

Tuesday 1 October 2013 8:18

Soooo, did you get to keep them?

Squirrel1256 15

Tuesday 1 October 2013 8:19

Might need to put those in a better hiding place, or at least in a container you can lock.

Comments

cberry427 8

Saturday 5 October 2013 21:22

@68 I've never had to explain condoms or "used" tissues, cause I do a good job cleaning up after myself

pl0xs3rver 45

Friday 5 December 2014 14:38

My parents found my toys. I'm pretty sure they threw them away

wheresmytardis 7

Tuesday 24 March 2015 2:55

how do people but sex toys without their parents finding out I can't buy a bookmark without my parents knowing

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Today, my brother showed my wife a Craigslist ad by someone seeking casual sex. It had very specific details that made it seem like I wrote it. My brother later admitted in private that he made the post as revenge for me not loaning him $500 last month. Meanwhile, my wife still thinks I'm unfaithful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 644

You deserved it 1 158

Today, I was giving my boyfriend oral, and he got so into it that he grabbed my hair. Just as he was about to climax, he pulled my hair so hard that my extensions came out. I jerked back and hit my head on the wall behind me. He then came in my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 350

You deserved it 574

The Top

Today, after two years, my girlfriend finally got over her intimacy and commitment problems, with a guy she met over the summer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 229

You deserved it 3 291

Today, in the same sentence, my boyfriend told me that he wanted to "spend the rest of his life with me," and "I want to break up with you because I can't face your family." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 848

You deserved it 169

Today, Facebook put something out that shows a video of your entire life on the website. A part of it showed your most popular status update. Mine was from when I got dumped at Christmas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 480

You deserved it 5 304

Today, I got a text message. My phone was sitting on the edge of the bed and set on vibrate, so it fell off. I reached down to grab my phone and fell off the bed. My macbook landed on top of me. I fractured my arm and broke my laptop to read a text from facebook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 269

You deserved it 21 219

Today, my brother decided our bathroom needed a clock so he used an old DVD player. He put it on the edge of the tub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 361

You deserved it 3 836

Today, my neighbour across the street has entered his ninth consecutive hour of playing Limp Bizkit at full blast. The only thing overriding my concern for his mental health is my sheer surprise that they have 9 hours of original music. FML

I agree, your life sucks 909

You deserved it 101

Same thing different taste

Welcome home

Thanks, Dad!

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