Miscellaneous: Today, my roommate decided to fry some bacon. After finishing,...

By burned - 04/11/2009 10:12 - United States

Today, my roommate decided to fry some bacon. After finishing, he thought it would be easy to clean up if he just tossed the panful of grease out the second story window. Guess where I was standing at the time? FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 148

You deserved it 2 559

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Same thing different taste

Oh nose!

By Fried. - 14/05/2019 16:00

Today, I woke up to the smell of cooking bacon. As I walked down my stairs towards my kitchen, I realised that the smell wasn't coming from bacon, but from my kitchen being on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 976

You deserved it 134

Breakfast time!

By shit flavored eggs - 09/03/2021 00:30

Today, I decided to make an almighty breakfast of fried eggs and bacon. I couldn't find anything to flip the eggs with so I used a red spatula that my sister handed me. As I was finishing a delicious fry up, my mom came downstairs and asked me why the cat litter scoop was resting in the frying pan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 065

You deserved it 460

By chinesef000d - 29/08/2009 05:38 - United States

Today, I was sleeping in my apartment when I woke up to the smell of smoke. Alarmed, I ran out to the kitchen to find my roommates trying to put out a fire on the stove. As soon as they saw me, they ran for it, informing me that it was my problem now. They used my good frying pan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 963

You deserved it 3 200

By raybandy - 24/01/2009 00:22 - United States

Today, I wake up only to find that my roommates cooked all my food. Now I'm starving and the place smells like delicious bacon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 272

You deserved it 2 373

By burned - 24/05/2009 13:44 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was cooking me dinner. He walked away and I decided to help by giving the pan of veggies a sautee flip. My boyfriend failed to mention that he had just pulled that pan out of a 500 degree oven. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 115

You deserved it 64 142

Smells like…

By makin bacon - 08/11/2019 20:00

Today, my idiot roommate read somewhere that bacon grease could be used on squeaky doors and windows. Now, we're desperately trying to scrub the rancid goop out of door hinges and window tracks. Our whole place smells like rotten pig ass and death. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 248

You deserved it 445

By Anonymous - 22/10/2011 04:07 - United States

Today, while cooking with my girlfriend, I thought it would be funny to slap her with a raw porkchop. She thought it would be funny to throw the hot cooking grease on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 421

You deserved it 54 851

Scarfing it down

By Anonymous - 25/03/2024 10:00 - United States

Today, my mom sent me home with some delicious-looking BBQ ribs because I'd missed a cookout due to work. I set them on the counter, intent on putting them in the oven, but had to make a quick run to the bathroom. I came back to find my roommate's cat sitting in the plate, covered in sauce, as he helped himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 345

You deserved it 411

By fuckendog - 25/07/2014 06:05 - Australia - Virginia

Today, I was cooking bacon while my dog watched me, drooling. I thought this was funny and I teased her a bit. I then slipped in the drool as I was carrying the bacon and she got to enjoy it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 228

You deserved it 55 788

By Face - 09/01/2010 10:12 - Australia

Today, I got hit in the face with a piece of bacon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 354

You deserved it 34 743

plutosaplanet 0

Wednesday 4 November 2009 20:08

oh pick me pick me!! you were standing in line at the grocery store?!?!

pinkdancer 0

Wednesday 4 November 2009 20:37

Nooooooooo! Lmfao! He only threw out the grease. Duh! Hahahahahahaha!!!!!!! Man I swear ppl's dumb comments are the only thing funny about this website.

Comments

omgzdude 0

Monday 30 November 2009 1:49

idiot. has he ever heard of this great invention called the sink?

Bucinka 5

Thursday 24 December 2009 19:13

To be fair, some people don't like to pour hot grease down the sink because that is a major contributor to clogs, possibly necessitating a plumber call (probably a $115 minimum where he lives; I'm guessing they're UVa or VaTech students renting somewhere) and also it will melt the flaps on the garbage disposal; I've done that. That said, if he didn't want to pour it down the sink, he should have poured it into an old container such as a glass jar. I know people who save up grease that way and then throw away the jar (or use it later for cooking, which I think is eew but they do do it). I still stand by my original assertion that the bacon cooker is a primetime douche.

bree_91 0

Saturday 30 January 2010 14:53

umm #1 I dont think he chucked the whole pan. just the contents

linzercookies 0

Sunday 11 April 2010 23:36

Oh, the horrors of defenestration.

ceinaworus 0

Wednesday 30 March 2011 9:08

hmmm, some of these fmls seem like lies... if you got hot grease dumped on your dome you would have like 3rd degree burns and the last thing you would do is tell people on here.