Health: Today, my roommate showed me that her pepper spray had expired,...

By Anonymous - 06/07/2011 18:45 - United States

Today, my roommate showed me that her pepper spray had expired, so I decided to test it on myself. It worked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 284

You deserved it 79 715

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By Dr Pepper - 22/05/2019 18:05

Today, to protect me from the 'bad people' out there, my mom bought some pepper spray. While trying to test it, I accidentally sprayed myself in the eyes. Now, every person I meet asks me what I've been crying about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 905

You deserved it 1 711

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By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my mom bought me pepper spray in case anyone tried to "mess" with me. I put it in my purse. Later, a guy snatched my purse before I even had the chance to take out the pepper spray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 577

You deserved it 4 276

By Anonymous - 06/09/2012 01:34 - Canada

Today, I told a girl that she had very pretty eyes. I then had to rinse pepper spray from my own. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 930

You deserved it 2 893

By Username - 09/02/2011 03:27

Today, I got mugged. But luckily I had on my keyring the pepper spray that my husband had insisted I keep with me. Unlucky for me, my husband's co-worker, who borrowed my keys, emptied my pepper by spraying it on a brick wall one day when he was bored. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 399

You deserved it 3 127

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By Anonymous - 09/02/2017 15:00 - United States - Stevenson Ranch

Today, after pranking my roommate several times by putting lube in his hand sanitizer bottle, he got me back by putting sanitizer in my lube. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 777

You deserved it 12 062

By Anonymous - 19/09/2010 01:57 - United States

Today, after lunch with my frail, disabled, 87-year-old father, I reached into my purse for lipstick. I didn't recognize the cute cylinder I pulled out, but thinking it was a flashlight, I pressed the little button, spraying my dad and myself in the face with pepper spray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 591

You deserved it 36 414

Zapped

By joey - 09/03/2020 05:00

Today, my mom decided to try her new taser on me while I was asleep on the couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 852

You deserved it 157

By Anonymous - 29/05/2010 13:16 - Malaysia

Today, someone switched my hairspray with bug spray when I didn't notice. I used it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 991

You deserved it 6 547

By Anonymous - 10/03/2013 00:40 - United Kingdom - Brighton

Today, I received an email from my friend in South Africa, with whom I'll soon be staying for 2 months. She was telling me that she had bought me a few things so I would be prepared for my stay. What did she buy me? A taser and some pepper-spray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 990

You deserved it 5 566

By spoiled22 - 12/10/2011 07:17 - United Kingdom

Today, I was trying to change the batteries of my automatic room freshener. As I held it to my face to figure out where the batteries went, it started spraying on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 866

You deserved it 28 212

flockz 19

Wednesday 6 July 2011 23:58

dumbass nice job spraying yourself.

karmennn 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 0:00

that was stupid. ydi for spraying yourself with pepper spray...expired or not

Comments

cleolappost 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 3:33

I just read your entry out loud to my 8yr old and even she said that was stupid!!!! lmaoffff!!!!

Tyurguy 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 3:38

Nice job dumbass

pan1cked 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 3:40

um, that was really stupid.

babygirlc1 5

Thursday 7 July 2011 3:41

why would you test it?

uxbx 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 3:47

just because the pepper stay expired doesn't mean it's not going to hurt anymore. my bullets expired the other day you wanna test those?

nonelikeworms 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 3:47

Whyyyyyyy??

Karen93_fml 3

Thursday 7 July 2011 3:47

Ahaha wow your smart.

shelbers04 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 3:52

why... why would you EVER spray yourself???

jmf62 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 3:53

Wow you are dumb. Really really freaking dumb.

sophiagotswag 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 3:56

Oh yeah, because it's smart to test if pepper spray is expired or not on yourself.

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I agree, your life sucks 14 434

You deserved it 46 509

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You deserved it 10 056

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I agree, your life sucks 26 974

You deserved it 9 356

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I agree, your life sucks 34 707

You deserved it 4 440

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I agree, your life sucks 405

You deserved it 950

Today, my girlfriend's father sent me a text message that simply stated "You ruined my relationship with my daughter." I wanted to ask him for his blessing to marry his daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 027

You deserved it 3 400

Today, I was talking to my only grandson about how I was going to the dentist to get my teeth fixed and how it was going to cost a lot of money, he replied saying "Who cares, you're going to die soon anyways". FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 604

You deserved it 3 961

Today, my girlfriend ran off with my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 182

You deserved it 228

Same thing different taste

I'm not sad. Or am I?

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