Love: Today, my wife got so upset I didn't hold her while Snooki from...

By drastech99 - 23/09/2011 06:22 - United States

Today, my wife got so upset I didn't hold her while Snooki from Jersey Shore was crying, that after the episode was done she locked herself in our room crying. Now I have to sleep on the floor of my living room. Thanks Snooki. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 748

You deserved it 8 408

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 17/10/2011 21:37 - United States

Today, I learned the hard way how easy it is to get on my boss's bad side. We were talking about reality TV shows and I'd mentioned how much I despise Snooki, and how useless to the planet she is. Now I fear for my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 255

You deserved it 6 369

Going well, isn't it?

By Abandon - 20/07/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, it was supposed to be my night off from the baby. Instead, my wife said she "couldn't even begin to deal", so she locked herself in the bedroom and I had to watch both my baby and my stepson, who both became hyper-needy the second she shut the door. This is the fifth time in a row. FML

I agree, your life sucks 469

You deserved it 185

By Anonymous - 31/01/2014 22:08 - United States - Blue Earth

Today, my evening was shot to hell when I found my pregnant wife on the floor, sobbing because we'd run out of cheese sticks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 425

You deserved it 9 063

No Ragrets

By Rodolfo_el - 17/04/2021 10:59

Today, my wife made me sleep on the couch because I ate the last Magnum Ice Cream bar. Last week, she bitched me out for singing too loud in the shower. I strongly regret leaving my ex-girlfriend of 5 years for this woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 502

You deserved it 1 893

Oh, hai Mark!

By Anonymous - 06/11/2020 14:02

Today, my wife got back from a "homesick" trip to NY State. She brought her boyfriend back with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 159

You deserved it 96

Compassion

By Anemity_is_my_name - 07/01/2021 14:01 - United States

Today, I'm exhausted and sore from a long night of pulling semis out of the snow. My wife is pissed because I want to sleep, instead of be with her. Every time I drift off, she starts doing things like loudly unloading the dishwasher or standing by our bedroom door talking loudly on the phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 493

You deserved it 90

Sensitive

By itsevenworse - 07/08/2021 00:01 - France

Today, my wife is giving me the silent treatment and has locked herself in the bedroom, all because I politely asked her to put the dishcloth away when she was done with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 684

You deserved it 152

By Unknown - 07/07/2011 15:12 - United States

Today, while at the beach, I was mistaken for Snooki. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 296

You deserved it 27 513

By Renderfist - 06/07/2017 18:30

Today, I had to comfort my wife after she found out that her boyfriend wasn't faithful to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 841

You deserved it 1 875

By Anonymous - 21/05/2019 14:11

Today, I ate dinner sitting on the floor. My petty roommate got pissed off during the weekend and decided the appropriate action would be to lock all the furniture in her room and refuse to give it back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 779

You deserved it 198

SugarRushxx 0

Friday 23 September 2011 12:16

I think your wife needs to grow up.

saIty 17

Friday 23 September 2011 12:17

Snooki: Worsening the life of one person everyday.

Comments

Lucky7Samson 10

Saturday 20 April 2013 0:36

Be a man. Kick your damn door in and sleep in your bed. If you work and pay bills you can do what you want in your crib.

red61977 9

Tuesday 4 June 2013 6:33

Your wife is an idiot.

villain1987 1

Tuesday 12 November 2013 16:26

Your wife is a moron who needs to get real

Cas547 8

Saturday 28 December 2013 21:32

New wife.

fantasyworld 37

Thursday 4 December 2014 10:35

Kick down the door.

Azrty_fml 0

Thursday 1 January 2015 17:06

Stomp her immediately

chadminer337 9

Friday 8 May 2015 12:30

DIVORCE

nemcali 34

Saturday 15 August 2015 2:58

Your wife is either stupid or very hormonal...

bhopejohnston 16

Saturday 17 October 2015 19:30

red flag

youdontsay123456 21

Tuesday 8 March 2016 22:19

Don't mind me just randomly commenting

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The Top

Today, I realized that I will never be able to buy the car I've wanted since middle school. The car? A greyish-silver Volvo, which is the make and color of car Kurt Cobain drove. The reason? I've been informed that it's also the make and color of the car that Edward Cullen drives in Twilight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 792

You deserved it 11 207

Today, I couldn't sleep because I had the worst time positioning myself around my cat who was sleeping in my bed. I couldn't kick my cat out of bed because I earlier today had an argument with my brother over which of us the cat loved more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 005

You deserved it 42 709

The Top

Today, I ate an apple. My sister then walks in dressed as a witch, and asks, "Have you seen my poisoned apple?" She was playing at Snow White, and the apple had been dipped in the toilet, the cat's food bowl and the garbage can. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 323

You deserved it 6 840

Today, I was kayaking with my family for my birthday when we tipped over while going down a rocky cascade. My husband badly cut up his arm, and my car keys and my phone both went for a swim and never returned. Great birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 464

You deserved it 8 679

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I agree, your life sucks 494

You deserved it 63

Today, I decided to see if electric dog collars work on human necks. They do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 721

You deserved it 119 058

Today, my boyfriend came over. We'd planned on losing out virginities today. What we didn't plan on was having my 9-year-old brother and his friends making a video of "What teens do when no one is home." They taped the whole thing, including the five minutes it took us to get the condom on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 980

You deserved it 942

Today, my 14-year-old step-daughter announced that she is 4 months pregnant. The father is my 15-year-old son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 86 399

You deserved it 10 168