Health: Today, my wife made a joke about the size of my package, so figuring...

By smith - 28/01/2012 03:13 - United Kingdom

Today, my wife made a joke about the size of my package, so figuring all's fair in love and war, I bought some laxatives to prank her with. They took a lot longer to work than I thought, and I ended up lying in bed, listening to my wife shitting her guts out in the bathroom for over an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 406

You deserved it 57 897

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Same thing different taste

When pranking goes too far

By Anonymous - 27/03/2021 20:01

Today, my husband has both arms broken, and I have to help him in the bathroom. Not the problem. My girlfriends and I have been pranking each other lately and it's been fun, but they decided to slip my husband slip him some laxatives so that I would have to clean him him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 056

You deserved it 196

By FUCK GOD - 03/02/2013 23:04 - Argentina - Salta

Today, for the first time in weeks, my wife felt frisky, and we started fooling around. Half-way through undressing me, she bolted out, claiming she had the shits. About five minutes later, she tearfully called out from the bathroom, begging me to bring her a fresh roll of toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 124

You deserved it 4 859

By Anonymous - 15/09/2014 18:48 - United Kingdom - Liverpool

Today, I took a shit of biblical proportions. I flushed and opened a window, but my pregnant wife went in straight after me. Her morning sickness kicked in and she quickly ran out, vomit dripping from her mouth. She's pissed and thinks I planned the whole thing as a prank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 184

You deserved it 4 388

By Anonymous - 21/01/2015 04:29 - United States - Bentonville

Today, thinking he was being so hilarious, my friend slipped me enough laxatives to make a horse shit its intestines out. I haven't been able to move from the toilet for over an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 001

You deserved it 2 891

Revenge is sweet

By Anonymous - 12/10/2013 22:03 - Iceland - Akranes

Today, my mom was acting really pissy, and I couldn't help but mutter that she must be on her period. Five hours later, I'm glued to the toilet with my phone, because she went all out for revenge and spiked my dinner with some hellishly potent kind of laxative. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 263

You deserved it 27 806

By someone - 01/04/2014 19:21 - United States - Point Pleasant

Today, I resorted to the oldest prank in the book: laxatives in the food. Except it wasn't for a prank, but just a desperate attempt to get my clingy boyfriend to leave me the hell alone. I think I'm going to hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 569

You deserved it 12 677

Blockages

By jakestorm - 04/09/2019 20:00

Today, my girlfriend texted me to pick her up some medicine because she’s "all plugged up." When I arrived with laxatives, she yelled at me. She meant her sinuses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 708

You deserved it 378

Great boyfriend, part 2

By thanks a lot - 04/05/2020 05:00

Today, my boyfriend made me a latte. It tasted off, but I didn't want to hurt his feelings so I drank it. Turns out he put laxatives in it as a prank. The idiot couldn’t just use one or two. He used so many that I had to go to the ER for severe dehydration after puking and shitting for hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 928

You deserved it 224

Stuck

By Anonymous - 09/08/2022 10:00 - Australia

Today, I had to take a laxative for the first time. Instead of working gently overnight like it promised, I woke up at 3 a.m. to an unrelenting river of shit that made my legs numb on the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 034

You deserved it 157

By ugh - 03/09/2013 23:53 - United States - Lancaster

Today, I ended up taking a massive dump after being constipated for a while. I thought I was alone, so I pretended I was giving birth to my turd, and let out all kinds of sound effects. Next thing I know, I hear a knock at the door and my mom asking, "Should I call 911?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 765

You deserved it 40 918

Pr0metheus 7

Saturday 28 January 2012 5:14

Hm well I think your wife should be the one writing this FML, you know since she's practically ******** fire in there...

kayleebearr 6

Saturday 28 January 2012 5:16

YDI for giving your wife laxatives just because she made fun of your tiny wiener .

Comments

Coffeebang 17

Saturday 28 January 2012 5:46

Someone's sensitive

sknabc123 8

Saturday 28 January 2012 5:46

Take a joke , she said something so you make her whole night crappy ?? I'm sure she's having a good time crapping her brains out , and ps. Any husband who is seeks enough to lace his wife shouldn't be trusted pps. Don't complain , you deserve it

lrgenesis 19

Saturday 28 January 2012 5:47

Shit happens

chelseaaa92 7

Saturday 28 January 2012 5:51

Not cool..

THE_A_TEEN 27

Saturday 28 January 2012 5:52

Let's see, she joke's about your penis, and you "retaliate" by giving her laxatives? LAXATIVES?? The same over-the-counter medication that can hospitalize a person? You know what I think? You are a ******* immature asshole. You resorted to using medication for revenge, and she has been there for an hour. I hope that after this you learn from your mistakes and mature a bit. If not, there is no hope for you. You ******* deserve it!

TheJawsman 18

Saturday 28 January 2012 17:45

You know what? F*** YOU. Insulting a man's manhood can have lasting psychological consequences. A lot of you all don't get that. Besides, a lax practical joke is usually funny.

GLaDOSv1_09 19

Monday 30 January 2012 13:30

171, how dare you insult not only my sense of humor, but my psychological abilities as well. I'm GLaD that I now know a joke you're a fan of.

amisenho 11

Friday 17 January 2014 16:02

#171: Oh, no, we totally get it. It's like when a man tells a woman she's fat or that her breasts are too small. You don't think that has lasting psychological consequences? I guess anorexia and bulimia are myths, plastic surgery is at an all-time low, and he was "just joking" about her being fat or inadequate in the boob department. Sorry, but I don't buy that, dude. If OP wanted revenge, he should have said something along the lines of making fun of her weight or breasts, not slip her drugs without consent. What he did was like retaliating a Nerf dart with a rifle.