Health: Today, someone asked when my baby was due. I'm not pregnant,...

By preggo - 01/08/2011 01:16 - United States

Today, someone asked when my baby was due. I'm not pregnant, but I was so embarrassed to be mistaken for a pregnant lady that I rubbed my tummy and said "December." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 332

You deserved it 15 684

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Same thing different taste

By Liar Liar - 12/02/2011 07:50 - United States

Today, while shopping in the baby department at a local department store, a woman approached me asking when I was due. I told her that I was due in 4 months. I lied. I'm not pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 844

You deserved it 28 950

By Anonymous - 27/08/2019 12:00

Today, a stranger at the grocery store rubbed my belly and asked me when I'm due. I'm not pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 522

You deserved it 264

By sexybelly - 26/03/2015 08:35 - Australia - Parramatta

Today, I was asked when my baby is due. My baby was due 6 months ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 874

You deserved it 4 624

By Anonymous - 25/08/2012 15:48 - United Kingdom - Northampton

Today, while on the bus, a small child asked me if I was having a baby, and I replied "Yes." I'm not. I was just too ashamed to admit I was fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 729

You deserved it 10 731

Belly bounce!

By Karen - 23/05/2024 18:00 - United States - Solon

Today, a customer greeted me with, "So! When's the baby coming!?" I'm NOT pregnant. I just gain weight in my guts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 385

You deserved it 174

By Anonymous - 19/08/2015 05:15 - United States - Mineola

Today, my boyfriend is so ashamed of me that when someone asked how far along my pregnancy is, he quickly replied "5 months now!" instead of telling them I'm not actually pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 350

You deserved it 11 518

By BobbyMalone - 17/01/2009 14:11 - Canada

Today, my mother asked a woman at the clothing store we go to all the time when her baby was due. Turns out the woman isn't pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 099

You deserved it 5 257

By pencilskirt - 22/03/2019 00:00

Today, at school, one of my students confidently told me that I "wasn't hiding my baby bump very well anymore." I'm not pregnant. Just fat, apparently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 137

You deserved it 302

By Anonymous - 06/10/2011 20:35 - United States

Today, my new coworker asked if I knew her daughter. I responded yes and asked how her pregnancy was going. She didn't know her daughter was pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 790

You deserved it 6 851

By booyouwhoree - 03/03/2009 20:49 - United States

Today, I told my friend I hadn't had a period in 5 months. She asked me if I was pregnant. When I asked her if I looked 5 months pregnant, she replied, "Is that supposed to be a trick question?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 843

You deserved it 18 412

Rico_Mal1116 0

Monday 1 August 2011 9:10

Go with the flow all ways works.

tehspy1337 0

Monday 1 August 2011 9:10

Next time say "it's yours"

Comments

Chilibean33 0

Wednesday 3 August 2011 9:48

Lmao!! Ooh that's awful good cover tho.

dtang 0

Wednesday 3 August 2011 9:50

Haha its funny cuz she's fat! Suck on dees little chinese NUTS

mattrd_fml 31

Wednesday 3 August 2011 18:27

aww... that sucks OP. FYL

ninidunut 0

Thursday 4 August 2011 18:47

just say "I don't know ask your boyfriend" ;)

leberist 0

Thursday 4 August 2011 20:33

You should tell them your getting an abortion.

ImDeathRow_fml 0

Friday 5 August 2011 7:31

reality check

jenna5960 7

Friday 5 August 2011 16:37

Been there done that. The last time it happened I said "oh, I'm not pregnant I just had my baby" My daughter is 5 so fml too.

Shellster 10

Thursday 11 August 2011 18:06

This is what I call "A GREAT RECOVERY". No need to make things weird

babyboox333 0

Wednesday 12 October 2011 2:56

Hahahahahahahahahahahhahahaahha yooooo this made me laugh !!!! Good one budday

laxman38 6

Sunday 16 October 2011 5:08

Ha ha fat ass

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. He knows that I love when he breathes on my neck. Just when I was about to finish, he put his lips a millimeter away from my neck and ear, and breathed, "I love how you smell like my grandmother's house." FML

I agree, your life sucks 111 815

You deserved it 9 770

Today, I was in an elevator with my girlfriend when it suddenly stopped. Thinking of being spontaneous like in all the movies, I propped her up on the railings and started getting passionate. That's when the emergency phone rang. And I discovered there was a security camera. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 331

You deserved it 41 023

The Top

Today, at the grocery store, an elderly woman asked for help with some tea. I lent her a hand, spending a good twenty minutes reading different labels out loud until she found one she liked. After she was done, she handed me a pamphlet and said, "You're a nice girl. I hope you don't go to hell." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 583

You deserved it 4 828

Today, hoping to avoid the rain because I had just gotten an expensive perm, I ducked under an awning. At that moment, the store manager shook the awning, and about 6 hours of rain dumped on my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 489

You deserved it 8 468

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 763

You deserved it 9 137

Today, I got an almost $200 vet bill because my mom's cat tried to eat a cactus. This same cat chewed through a wall only a week prior. I have no idea what this crazy thing will do next. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 107

You deserved it 446

Today, I was helping some friends put supplies in my crush's car for our picnic. His girlfriend cracked a joke about me, so I just sarcastically laughed and slammed the door shut. Now she has three broken fingers, and I have a reputation as a psychopath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 367

You deserved it 9 394

Today, I got hit in the face at a dodge-ball tournament. My entire mouth was bloody. The sad thing is, I wasn't even playing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 643

You deserved it 3 309

Same thing different taste

Belly bounce!

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