Health: Today, someone asked when my baby was due. I'm not pregnant,...

By preggo - 01/08/2011 01:16 - United States

Today, someone asked when my baby was due. I'm not pregnant, but I was so embarrassed to be mistaken for a pregnant lady that I rubbed my tummy and said "December." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 332

You deserved it 15 684

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Same thing different taste

By Liar Liar - 12/02/2011 07:50 - United States

Today, while shopping in the baby department at a local department store, a woman approached me asking when I was due. I told her that I was due in 4 months. I lied. I'm not pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 844

You deserved it 28 950

By Anonymous - 27/08/2019 12:00

Today, a stranger at the grocery store rubbed my belly and asked me when I'm due. I'm not pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 522

You deserved it 264

By sexybelly - 26/03/2015 08:35 - Australia - Parramatta

Today, I was asked when my baby is due. My baby was due 6 months ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 874

You deserved it 4 624

By Anonymous - 25/08/2012 15:48 - United Kingdom - Northampton

Today, while on the bus, a small child asked me if I was having a baby, and I replied "Yes." I'm not. I was just too ashamed to admit I was fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 729

You deserved it 10 731

Belly bounce!

By Karen - 23/05/2024 18:00 - United States - Solon

Today, a customer greeted me with, "So! When's the baby coming!?" I'm NOT pregnant. I just gain weight in my guts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 385

You deserved it 174

By Anonymous - 19/08/2015 05:15 - United States - Mineola

Today, my boyfriend is so ashamed of me that when someone asked how far along my pregnancy is, he quickly replied "5 months now!" instead of telling them I'm not actually pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 350

You deserved it 11 518

By BobbyMalone - 17/01/2009 14:11 - Canada

Today, my mother asked a woman at the clothing store we go to all the time when her baby was due. Turns out the woman isn't pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 099

You deserved it 5 257

By pencilskirt - 22/03/2019 00:00

Today, at school, one of my students confidently told me that I "wasn't hiding my baby bump very well anymore." I'm not pregnant. Just fat, apparently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 137

You deserved it 302

By Anonymous - 06/10/2011 20:35 - United States

Today, my new coworker asked if I knew her daughter. I responded yes and asked how her pregnancy was going. She didn't know her daughter was pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 790

You deserved it 6 851

By booyouwhoree - 03/03/2009 20:49 - United States

Today, I told my friend I hadn't had a period in 5 months. She asked me if I was pregnant. When I asked her if I looked 5 months pregnant, she replied, "Is that supposed to be a trick question?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 843

You deserved it 18 412

Rico_Mal1116 0

Monday 1 August 2011 9:10

Go with the flow all ways works.

tehspy1337 0

Monday 1 August 2011 9:10

Next time say "it's yours"

Comments

SinfulRose 0

Monday 1 August 2011 20:10

Wait how is this a FML? some people complain about stupid shit

MitchShadows 1

Monday 1 August 2011 20:42

Good luck on your new diet, fatty!

marlie_x 8

Tuesday 2 August 2011 8:17

Ever heard the saying "pot calling the kettle black"

ReynshineCutting 10

Tuesday 2 August 2011 18:07

167- I was thinking the exact same thing!

LoSeR_LiKe_Me_08 1

Monday 1 August 2011 20:45

You may not have a models body but your mind is intact. Good REACTION . Well done

nerdsgetmehot 22

Monday 1 August 2011 20:53

Some people are so rude! Sorry, OP. :(

JPLovesAnimals 4

Monday 1 August 2011 21:05

The awkward moment when you look three months prego and December is only a month away. Lol.

squanmonster 8

Monday 1 August 2011 21:09

1337

MrIncredibleSME 3

Monday 1 August 2011 22:22

If you don't like being overweight then do something about it. If you're fine with it don't make excuses for yourself.

sarah_loves_yuh 0

Monday 1 August 2011 22:24

So for Christmas, ask Santa for a baby.

HagarenLei 0

Monday 1 August 2011 22:25

Your not alone, I'd do the same

BellaBoo8275 1

Monday 1 August 2011 23:13

Thats really funny, sorry for the mess up though

Keywords

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Today, I found out that in the three years I've been dating my boyfriend, his parents have secretly been going through all of his emails, including the ones I've sent him with "sexy" pictures attached. I can't look his parents in the eye without being reminded that they've both seen me naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 300

You deserved it 14 749

Today, I was jogging in the neighborhood. My new neighbor who lives three houses down clotheslines me and shouts, "You're the reason my wife won't have sex with me!" He then kicked me in the stomach and walked inside. Now I'm scared to leave my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 664

You deserved it 3 777

The Top

Today, I usually take my daughter to daycare; my wife had to drop her daughter off at 8. The kid refused to get up, making them late. Wife argues with me, claiming I made her late. She said hurtful things and left late at 8:30. We haven't spoken and probably won't for the rest of Christmas week. I love Christmas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 842

You deserved it 156

Today, my roommate stumbled in drunk at 5am with 3 Big Macs, and passed out on the floor after eating them. This happens almost every night. I stay in, study, work, and go to the gym almost everyday. And she still has better grades, a better body, and makes more money than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 766

You deserved it 4 571

Today, I found out that my boyfriend has a Facebook account. He said he didn't have one. Apparently he's not divorced after all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 520

You deserved it 2 321

Today, I got a serious infection following a medically necessary circumcision, and my doctor told me they will probably have to remove even more of the skin where the infection is particularly aggressive. My knob is gonna look like Freddy Krueger's face on a bad day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 708

You deserved it 148

Today, my girlfriend offered a blow job, but my hair got stuck in her braces so instead we tried to pull them all out. And no, I didn't get any. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 871

You deserved it 13 393

Today, I accidentally scared my one year-old son with my huge, smelly fart that was really loud. He now won't come near me without crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 941

You deserved it 671

Same thing different taste

Belly bounce!

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