Miscellaneous: Today, the woman giving me a manicure found a booger under one... - FML

By inosehowthatgotthere - 10/02/2011 01:12 - United States

Today, the woman giving me a manicure found a booger under one of my fingernails. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 354

You deserved it 52 582

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By WeldedShut - 03/03/2017 18:00

Today, I was with a wedding party getting manicures. I absentmindedly used a freshly-painted nail to pick my nose and ended up with two beauticians scraping indestructible bright red gel varnish out of my left nostril with acetone soaked q-tips, while everyone sat waiting in complete silence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 780

You deserved it 8 266

By davincourt - 29/04/2012 18:31 - United States - Apollo Beach

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 282

You deserved it 3 004

By jeesh - 31/01/2009 11:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend caught me picking my nose and eating the booger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 971

You deserved it 89 322

By HaleyIsabelle - 08/03/2010 20:54 - France

Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 462

You deserved it 3 712

Yeet the feet

By SalonGirl - 10/03/2009 11:55 - United States

Today, I was at work and a very obese woman came in to get a pedicure. When she took her shoes off I noticed an odd black substance on her feet. I started scrubbing it off and wondered out loud, "What IS this stuff??" As a chunk of it fell onto my lip, she replied, "Girl, that's just the fungus." FML

I agree, your life sucks 113 624

You deserved it 7 286

Masterchef 2020

By Anonymous - 26/11/2020 18:58 - United States - Maryville

Today, I was eating some cake that my roommate's girlfriend brought by for us. I felt something weird in my mouth, so I stopped chewing to grab it. It was a fingernail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 980

You deserved it 66

By nyu - 25/01/2010 06:33 - United States

Today, I was getting a pedicure, and they used some sort of scrubby thing that really tickled my feet. When I couldn't take it any more, I accidentally kicked the lady who was doing my nails in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 117

You deserved it 24 471

Too stupid

By Anonymous - 15/02/2020 01:00

Today, I was picking my nose so aggressively that I flicked a booger right into my eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 480

You deserved it 2 285

By Anonymous - 12/05/2012 22:09 - Netherlands - Vianen

Today, while at work, I managed to scrape open the inside of my nose with my fingernail, drawing blood in the process. I had to quickly up an explanation for my scream that didn't go: "Well, I was scouting for boogers..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 503

You deserved it 24 715

What the…

By Anonymous - 06/10/2015 04:18 - United States - Lake Oswego

Today, at my annual checkup, the doc looks down at my foot and says, "Oh, you have an extra toenail. Six, huh?" Then sort of scraping at the side of my foot below the pinky toe, he pulls off a long piece of dead, dried skin and says, "Oh." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 068

You deserved it 6 386

Next

Top comments

allmidnighteyes 10

Thursday 10 February 2011 9:09

"inosehowthatgotthere" LOLLLL

kbourco 0

Thursday 10 February 2011 9:06

thats disgusting

Comments

EvilSpirt 5

Friday 11 February 2011 3:16

You should have checked every minute in the day you do that!! I like ur name OP !!! HAHAHAHAHA idk.

dansco 24

Friday 11 February 2011 4:35

Seriously you think this is a FML?! Stop picking your nose ffs!

trooper250 0

Friday 11 February 2011 6:39

saving it for later?

drizzydrake808 4

Friday 11 February 2011 6:43

that's not a booger that's toe jam!

ItsZulli 0

Friday 11 February 2011 7:00

yuck!!!

SassiestLemon 2

Friday 11 February 2011 7:41

Lol. That is all I can say.

ThickHead 0

Friday 11 February 2011 21:04

you picked it ydi

ColdGold 6

Friday 11 February 2011 22:05

Well. There goes lunch. There's alway toe-jam.

OmgWtfFmlRofl 0

Saturday 12 February 2011 17:31

Nasty.

lilbuni2004 1

Monday 14 February 2011 10:41

that one is all on you. I mean after no one could put the booger there for you. I'm pretty sure you'd have noticed someone else picking their nose with your finger. lol

2
3
4
5
6
7

Keywords

Work Coworkers Transportation Cars Dogs Animals Photography Art Videos Miscellaneous Love Awkward Health My ex Scams Sex Money Family AITA Healthy Lifestyle Am I overreacting? Babies Kids Mental health Sleep Parents Cheating Break-ups Nice Guys Facebook

The Top

Today, after a bad week I ordered a large pizza, ready to binge-watch TV. The delivery guy shows up, I hand him the cash, and he left without giving me my pizza. Exhausted, I watched him leave, like a confused puppy. I called the pizzeria; he'd left the pizza somewhere else, and couldn't re-deliver it because their driver was "done for the night.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 435

You deserved it 126

Today, I spent an hour preparing a heartfelt speech for my friend’s wedding. I stood up, got emotional, and promptly fainted, spilling a glass of wine all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 418

You deserved it 132

The Top

Today, I received yet another increase in my rent. When I moved into my crappy one bedroom apartment in Ohio on Feb 1st 2020 my rent was $525 a month. Now 4 years later its $1050. A 100% increase in 4 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 557

You deserved it 115

Today, I agreed to lend my daughter's inflatable pool to my neighbor for the day. Barely an hour later, I witnessed his son jump off their balcony, missing the pool by inches. He's now in hospital, and my neighbor has sworn to sue me, saying I'm responsible because the pool is mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 153

You deserved it 4 092

Today, while I was waiting at the bus stop, a car that looked like my mom's pulled up. Thinking it was actually her, I walked up and jokingly asked what she was into. The guy inside now thinks that I'm a prostitute. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 557

You deserved it 17 035

Today, I was mopping the floor at the hotel I work at. Before I could react, a gentleman stormed through the corridor and slipped and fell on the still wet floor. He complained to the owner, who bitched me out just to satisfy the guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 991

You deserved it 4 001

Today, my wife and I had another couple over. My wife was beside me while we all talked in the kitchen. I turned to put something in the fridge, and the other couple went into the next room. Turning back, I groped my wife's breasts playfully. She screamed and slapped me. It wasn't my wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 854

You deserved it 59 345

Today, I met my boyfriend's brother. When he saw me, he whispered into my boyfriend's ear, "So, this is your bitch eh? Nice!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 963

You deserved it 5 717