Love: Today, we were celebrating my birthday and my boyfriend thought... - FML

By Anonymous - 16/01/2011 02:33 - United States

Today, we were celebrating my birthday and my boyfriend thought it would be funny to shove my face in the cake. While the candles were still lit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 971

You deserved it 3 693

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Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Smash

By Unintended Victim - 08/12/2022 02:00

Today, I was sitting next to my friend as he blew out the candles on his birthday cake. Some asshole got the bright idea to shove his face in the cake, but they missed and pushed me in instead. The candles were still lit. My hair caught fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 021

You deserved it 105

Smashed

By Mr. Headshot - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff

Today, I celebrated my birthday with a few friends at home. As I bent down over my cake, my friend pushed my face into it. The baker should've told me she put a stick in it to support the cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 187

You deserved it 3 644

Great idea

By UnluckyLatina - 22/04/2016 03:30 - Canada - Montréal

Today, I celebrated my friend's birthday. While everyone was completely wasted, a couple of friends suggested that I throw a pie in the birthday boy's face. Only seconds after doing so did I realize that the centre of the pie had still been burning hot when he screamed in agony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 671

You deserved it 12 282

By Nothingonyou - 08/09/2010 07:35 - France

Today, it was my birthday. But instead of a decent surprise, my friends decided to smash a cake on my face and unhook my dress, while taking a video of it. In a public shopping mall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 195

You deserved it 3 333

By ilikecake - 29/05/2009 11:12 - United Arab Emirates

Today, it was my boyfriend's 24th birthday. His friends were throwing him a surprise party and I was in charge of getting his birthday cake. As a joke, I got it in the shape of a penis, with a graphic marzipan design. Funny, I never knew his overly-conservative parents were invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 386

You deserved it 53 426

By Anonymous - 23/09/2009 12:08 - Australia

Today, my husband blew all the candles on his birthday cake while I was taking a photo in front of him. I will probably never use cocoa powder to decorate a birthday cake anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 912

You deserved it 39 477

That blows

By Anonymous - 12/09/2022 23:30

Today, it's my birthday and I was very happy. When the moment came to blow the candles, all of the decoration on the cake flew off. It had taken an hour to make and set them on the cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 768

You deserved it 205

By Birthday blues - 13/12/2018 22:00

Today, it's my birthday. I lit my birthday candles on the cake I made myself and blew them out alone, while my worthless husband sat on the couch stuffing Doritos in his face. My present? He sprayed Lysol in the bathroom after he took a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 037

You deserved it 601

By Hotsauce887 - 29/03/2009 21:08 - United States

Today, my friend told the cute waiter it was my birthday. He brought out a dessert with a candle and put a huge sombrero on my head. Everyone at the restaurant started singing me happy birthday. I got embarrassed and put my head down. My sombrero caught on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 261

You deserved it 25 655

By Anonymous - 29/10/2013 10:40 - Australia

Today, I finally got to surprise my boyfriend with a birthday cake. I spent four days planning the perfect one. First thing he says? "Erm, you know I'm 32, right?" I got his age wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 928

You deserved it 36 649

Next

Top comments

LiznessMonster 9

Sunday 16 January 2011 13:43

(Boyfriend's Log, Entry No. 224) |Homicide Attempt 1 = Failure, will try again tomorrow.| "Honey what's that?" "Um....nothing."

k3rslc 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 9:38

OUCH, how smart of him. Hope you didn't have burns. :S Btw. Was the cake good anyway? Happy Birthday. LOL.

Comments

Wheredidgrungego 12

Sunday 16 January 2011 9:55

Well was it at least ice cream cake? That would have helped your burns. Did you get stuck in the eye with a candle though? If so, FYL hard.

ImRickJamesBish 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 9:56

Well that sucks!

Alanah101 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 9:58

Dang! That really sucks.

sourgirl101 28

Sunday 16 January 2011 10:08

I've always thought that if you were unable to blow out your candles in one huff, that you wouldn't get your wish. Sounds like you lost your opportunity this year.

saleha97 4

Sunday 16 January 2011 11:56

haha, same here :'-p

SirEBC 7

Sunday 16 January 2011 10:08

You deserve it for making the story two sentences when it should have been one.

15thPrestige 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 10:12

Somebody call 911! Shawty fireburnin in the candles ohhh wooahhh ohh

xStarKillerx 4

Sunday 16 January 2011 10:25

LOL!!! That's a lot better than the lame song I was going to come up with.

15thPrestige 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 10:27

I'm glad you enjoyed my song. ^.^

emjay09 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 15:45

you look like you're 5.

15thPrestige 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 19:56

Well this "5 year old" is far more inteligent then you'll ever be. Don't comment, you no picture ******.

oliver86 8

Sunday 16 January 2011 10:14

looks like the birthday celebrations, *sunglasses* went up in flames YEEEAAAHHHH!!!

lerouxmaster 7

Sunday 16 January 2011 23:42

No.

sammy92 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 10:20

hahaha nice

Radek18 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 10:20

did you make a wish?

birds_fml 7

Sunday 16 January 2011 10:30

Your boyfriend is either incredibly immature or abusive. Either way, dump him. What kind of asshole shoves someone's face into a cake, lit or not? It's not cute, it's mean.

hollee 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 16:25

abusive. lol ya, I'm sure that's it.

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Keywords

Friends Love Awkward Miscellaneous Cute Haircut Relatable You're fired Work Cars Kids Parenting Family DIY Cats Intimacy Sex Am I overreacting? Management Poopoo peepee Capitalism Coworkers Frustration Animals ADHD Dogs Transportation Dating Health Anxiety

The Top

Today, I'm pretty sure my husband of 8 years is sleeping with the skank who's in the fire department with him. Out of nowhere, he started texting her and wouldn’t come home until 12:30 a.m. for a whole week. When I confronted him about it, he flipped out. Sadly, it won’t be the first marriage she’s ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 202

You deserved it 182

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try the ice cubes in the vagina thing we'd read about. He kept sticking one in after another and they got stuck. My vagina had a brain freeze for a half an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 785

You deserved it 3 951

The Top

Today, I got my sister to pluck my eyebrows. She shaped them wrong, so now I look constantly sad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 102

You deserved it 30 007

Today, after meeting a girl for the first time and having sex with her, I found not only my wallet missing but also the 128 GB pen drive that had my project I've been working on for 6 months on it. I have to give the presentation in 3 days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 215

You deserved it 4 593

Today, my boyfriend bitched me out for being too controlling. Apparently, not only am I being unreasonable by not wanting him visiting strip clubs with his friends, I'm also just "looking for excuses to get mad" at him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 403

You deserved it 17 304

Today, my mom demanded that I go into the basement and fix the water heater. I told her that I had no idea how to fix it, so she threw my phone down the stairs, told me to Google it, and locked the basement door behind me. It's been two hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 824

You deserved it 3 230

Today, I got an Economics test back from my professor. I got a 17/20. I looked it over and noticed one of the questions was completely right. I checked the textbook he made and the answer was the same. I asked him why it was wrong, and he responded with, "I guess I changed my mind." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 752

You deserved it 2 727

Today, I'm a college student. Just like every other goddamn day, my roommate set about twenty alarms a good two hours before she even needs to get up. She just sleeps through the first hour or so of alarms while I wake up. I've been waking up at 6 a.m., even though my first classes are at 9. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 14 581

You deserved it 1 357