Love: Today, we were celebrating my birthday and my boyfriend thought... - FML

By Anonymous - 16/01/2011 02:33 - United States

Today, we were celebrating my birthday and my boyfriend thought it would be funny to shove my face in the cake. While the candles were still lit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 971

You deserved it 3 693

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Same thing different taste

Smash

By Unintended Victim - 08/12/2022 02:00

Today, I was sitting next to my friend as he blew out the candles on his birthday cake. Some asshole got the bright idea to shove his face in the cake, but they missed and pushed me in instead. The candles were still lit. My hair caught fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 021

You deserved it 105

Smashed

By Mr. Headshot - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff

Today, I celebrated my birthday with a few friends at home. As I bent down over my cake, my friend pushed my face into it. The baker should've told me she put a stick in it to support the cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 187

You deserved it 3 644

Great idea

By UnluckyLatina - 22/04/2016 03:30 - Canada - Montréal

Today, I celebrated my friend's birthday. While everyone was completely wasted, a couple of friends suggested that I throw a pie in the birthday boy's face. Only seconds after doing so did I realize that the centre of the pie had still been burning hot when he screamed in agony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 671

You deserved it 12 282

By Nothingonyou - 08/09/2010 07:35 - France

Today, it was my birthday. But instead of a decent surprise, my friends decided to smash a cake on my face and unhook my dress, while taking a video of it. In a public shopping mall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 195

You deserved it 3 333

By ilikecake - 29/05/2009 11:12 - United Arab Emirates

Today, it was my boyfriend's 24th birthday. His friends were throwing him a surprise party and I was in charge of getting his birthday cake. As a joke, I got it in the shape of a penis, with a graphic marzipan design. Funny, I never knew his overly-conservative parents were invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 386

You deserved it 53 426

By Anonymous - 23/09/2009 12:08 - Australia

Today, my husband blew all the candles on his birthday cake while I was taking a photo in front of him. I will probably never use cocoa powder to decorate a birthday cake anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 912

You deserved it 39 477

That blows

By Anonymous - 12/09/2022 23:30

Today, it's my birthday and I was very happy. When the moment came to blow the candles, all of the decoration on the cake flew off. It had taken an hour to make and set them on the cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 768

You deserved it 205

By Birthday blues - 13/12/2018 22:00

Today, it's my birthday. I lit my birthday candles on the cake I made myself and blew them out alone, while my worthless husband sat on the couch stuffing Doritos in his face. My present? He sprayed Lysol in the bathroom after he took a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 037

You deserved it 601

By Hotsauce887 - 29/03/2009 21:08 - United States

Today, my friend told the cute waiter it was my birthday. He brought out a dessert with a candle and put a huge sombrero on my head. Everyone at the restaurant started singing me happy birthday. I got embarrassed and put my head down. My sombrero caught on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 261

You deserved it 25 655

By Anonymous - 29/10/2013 10:40 - Australia

Today, I finally got to surprise my boyfriend with a birthday cake. I spent four days planning the perfect one. First thing he says? "Erm, you know I'm 32, right?" I got his age wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 928

You deserved it 36 649

Next

Top comments

LiznessMonster 9

Sunday 16 January 2011 13:43

(Boyfriend's Log, Entry No. 224) |Homicide Attempt 1 = Failure, will try again tomorrow.| "Honey what's that?" "Um....nothing."

k3rslc 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 9:38

OUCH, how smart of him. Hope you didn't have burns. :S Btw. Was the cake good anyway? Happy Birthday. LOL.

Comments

therealsuperman 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 10:42

You guys will look back on this and laugh after middle school and puberty

Writingislife16 1

Sunday 16 January 2011 20:31

Oh yes, I'm sure they will. "Hahaha hey hun , remember that time you shoved my face in cake when the candles were lit still?" :/.

starshine21 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 10:49

happy birthday (",)

MrsLender_fml 3

Sunday 16 January 2011 10:56

He was just trying to multi-task! He put out the candles and slammed your face in the cake simultaneously! That kid=good boyfriend.

maybaybe 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 11:04

Ouch :/ I hope your face is okay.

GoodLookingGeese 10

Sunday 16 January 2011 11:20

to much cartoons - make yourself a gift and change the bf - for a "non moron" model

ThatGuyYouDontKn 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 11:40

I don't know what your boyfriend was thinking, he could have poked your eyes out with those lit candles.

brothersbutler 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 19:53

lol

DaveOnDope 4

Sunday 16 January 2011 11:40

That's pretty damn harsh. Next thing you know he'll be apologizing for the black eye he gave you. Seriously, think about this. He was downright wrong and mean about it. Hopefully it's just a one off, but is there a pattern?

UpsidedownKayak 9

Sunday 16 January 2011 11:45

He was helping you by waxing your eyebrows and the fire just burns the dead skin away.

alicec123 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 11:46

it's not his fault that he is so stupid

heyred 11

Sunday 16 January 2011 12:16

Why isn't he your Ex boyfriend? Anyone who enjoys humiliating others is not worthy of your love.

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The Top

Today, I let my 4-month old puppy sleep with me. She’s been constipated for a while. I woke up to a foul odor in the middle of the night. Turns out she took a massive dump on the bed right by my head. I had to completely strip my bed to go back to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 788

You deserved it 473

Today, I asked a very cute fireman for his number, "just in case I needed him to come to my rescue." He told me, "Yeah, sure!" and scribbled it down. After he walked away, I read his note, which read: "911". FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 304

You deserved it 50 349

The Top

Today, my best friend decided to start dating my ex. We broke up yesterday. She also thinks I'm crazy because I'm upset about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 405

You deserved it 4 224

Today, I got into an accident, driving pretty slowly on a left turn signal trying to avoid a curb, sticking it out for too long, breaking a car's sideview mirror and causing scratches. The police was called. I have to appear in court for a misdemeanour for my first offence ever. Good bye student visa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 648

You deserved it 445

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a shower together for the first time. He was trying impress me and did some sort of dance move, he slipped, and when he fell he kicked my leg out causing me to fall and hit my face on the faucet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 405

You deserved it 4 241

Today, somebody broke into my car, just to steal the obviously fake $1,000,000 bill hanging from my rear-view mirror. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 087

You deserved it 11 975

Today, I was at the library. I had to use the restroom, where I ended up singing in bad, made-up Japanese the whole time. When I went back across the library, my brother informed me that everyone could clearly hear me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 374

You deserved it 43 500

Today, my husband, who rarely helps with big projects around the house, offered to help me with our mess of a backyard. An hour and a half into the project, and an hour and a half after he disappeared from the backyard, I found him mowing and edging the front. Our front yard was immaculate and didn't need mowed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 840

You deserved it 130