Work: Today, while all the other marines got to fly around the island...

By rogerusmc23 - 24/05/2011 02:41 - Japan

Today, while all the other marines got to fly around the island on a helicopter, I got stuck on gear guard. What was I guarding? The staff sergeant's parking spot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 269

You deserved it 4 607

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By larrythelobster - 11/02/2017 12:00 - United States

Today, one of my junior marines called to tell me they were in an accident that totaled both cars. The car he hit was parked in a nearby parking garage. It was mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 420

You deserved it 478

By Anonymous - 01/12/2010 06:38 - Iraq

Today, I had to pull guard duty. I had to guard the latrine because somebody likes to stuff whole toilet paper rolls in the toilet to clog it. Only six more months in Iraq. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 266

You deserved it 3 700

By anonymous - 11/02/2011 09:54

Today, I was posted with a very lonely gate-guard. From the second I arrived, I had to listen to him drone on and on, and now I know his entire life story. I was there for four hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 238

You deserved it 4 153

By carboat - 28/01/2009 09:24 - United States

Today, I woke up and I'm still in the Marine Corps. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 370

You deserved it 44 745

Let me out!

By Anonymous - 21/03/2016 21:26 - United States - Depew

Today, I parked my car in the company lot and walked down the street to a mandatory company training. While I was at the training, everyone back at the office decided to leave early and locked the company lot. My car is now stuck there for the night and I'm walking home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 924

You deserved it 1 530

By Anonymous - 03/10/2010 14:59 - Australia

Today, I got my posting orders for the Air Force. After spending four years training and studying to become an aerospace engineer, I am getting sent to the only base without aircraft. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 184

You deserved it 3 235

By naps aren't what they used to be - 27/04/2013 22:05 - United States

Today, my car was stolen from the parking garage, the same one I work at as a security guard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 093

You deserved it 25 946

By Xx_DEXIJOKER_xX - 12/11/2014 03:16 - United States - Spotswood

Today, my father picked me up from the police academy I'm attending, and got caught speeding. The officer was my drill instructor, and I had to do push-ups on the side of the highway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 102

You deserved it 5 188

By Anonymous - 17/02/2014 17:36 - United States

Today, I was at work at the airport. I got called up to a plane's cargo hold, and thought I'd finally learn how to use the loader. Turns out they just needed me to weigh something down, effectively making me ballast. Then my boss told me to get the hell off, after which I hit my head hard climbing out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 173

You deserved it 4 455

You're in the army now, oh ohoh, you're in the army. Now.

By LoveGlove - 21/06/2014 21:42 - Canada - Calgary

Today, my friends thought it would be funny to slip a condom under my pillow at boot camp. The staff found out, I got bitched out for 30 minutes straight, and now I have to put a condom on the grip of any rifle I'm issued for a week. My new callsign is "Love Glove". FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 131

You deserved it 4 958

MagicMushrooms 0

Tuesday 24 May 2011 8:40

RAMIERZ!!! GUARD MY PARKING SPOT!

mfmylifesrsly 29

Tuesday 24 May 2011 8:39

I love military men :)

Comments

TheoryPanda 0

Friday 27 May 2011 20:55

You shouldn't be posting on FML, those terrorists might steal his spot

Infantry0311 0

Saturday 28 May 2011 8:19

oorah brother ! , nothin wrong with being a PFC . I just got back from Stan , im only an 18 year old E-2 with a purple heart , an AK round in my ribs, shrapnel in my pelvis and a Medcal discharge haha YUT!

someairforcedude 0

Sunday 29 May 2011 21:29

Lesson of the day: don't piss off your NCOIC.

conmanusmc 0

Monday 6 June 2011 23:34

oohrah!!!

TheSailorMan 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 19:40

grow the **** up. you're a marine, and you're complaining because you didn't go on a heli ride? what're you, four? seriously, there are men who don't get to see their firstborn children born, women who will never see their husbands again because of an IED, countless cases of men and women coming home to a significant other in bed with someone else (saw that happen to a fellow sailor), and you're submitting an FML for BS.

AtomicBryce 0

Sunday 19 June 2011 8:40

and you joined because......

seanchai 0

Thursday 30 June 2011 17:39

haha that's like the gear guard and security detail i had in Iraq: armored to the teeth in the heat while securing a patch for the officers and SNCOs to play football.