Miscellaneous: Today, while attempting to sneak out of my boyfriend's parents'...

By stairmaster - 05/04/2011 07:47

Today, while attempting to sneak out of my boyfriend's parents' house during my walk of shame, I fell down the stairs, spilling cherry coke all over myself, their walls, and the carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 428

You deserved it 45 878

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Same thing different taste

By brelni - 28/11/2010 17:17 - United States

Today, my ex-boyfriend came over to visit. Being nice, I let him walk down the stairs first, following after him. I still managed to reach the bottom before he did; after taking one step, I lost my footing and fell all the way down, scraping the skin off my arms and legs, and bruising my butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 213

You deserved it 4 772

You kinda deserved that one

By hlev24 - 03/03/2009 00:11 - United States

Today, I was walking down the street when a homeless man asked me for some spare change. I told him I didn't have any. I then tripped. Not only spilling the soda I was drinking all over myself, but also spilling the spare change I had from buying it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 177

You deserved it 110 087

Stealthy

By Anonymous - 11/12/2011 07:29 - Canada

Today, while my boyfriend was sneaking out before my parents awoke, he slipped on some ice and fell on their car. The alarm went off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 283

You deserved it 29 773

Freeze!

By Anonymous - 03/06/2024 06:00 - United States - Macon

Today, I was craving a cold Coke, so I grabbed one from the freezer where I had put it to chill quickly. As soon as I opened it, the can exploded all over me and the kitchen. I spent the next hour cleaning sticky residue off the floor, surrounding furniture, and even the ceiling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 262

You deserved it 443

By Caution - 02/10/2018 22:00

Today, at a house party someone smashed and spilled their drink. In my own drunken state, I decided to get the mop as someone might fall. I then fell over it and ended up with glass in my side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 202

You deserved it 590

By Mary - 05/03/2019 18:00

Today, I tried to go down the stairs two steps at a time. I slipped, fell flat on my ass, and busted my lower lip against my overbite. When I tried to get up, I realized I had also peed my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 043

You deserved it 1 401

By Tori - 16/02/2011 07:40 - United States

Today, I went to a restaurant with my boyfriend. Within seconds of getting my drink, I spilled it all over the table and my scarf. When the waiter was helping clean up the spill, he knocked over my boyfriend's drink. All over my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 332

You deserved it 5 019

By tikizombie - 30/08/2010 20:10 - Canada

Today, I was moving out of my old place. While walking around to make sure I would get my damage deposit back, I stepped on my roommate's lipstick and smeared it all over the white carpet. Then, I tripped on the phone cord and ripped the whole thing out of the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 211

You deserved it 8 404

By xMiSS_CuTiEx - 27/12/2009 22:25 - United States

Today, I remembered my mom got her carpet cleaned and to be careful while she was at work. To be nice, I vacuumed the whole house. Feeling proud of myself, I got a drink and went upstairs. I tripped and spilled red Kool-Aid all over the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 109

You deserved it 14 370

Sorry

By Awkward - 01/02/2013 22:53 - United Kingdom - Wolverhampton

Today, I tripped while walking down a large flight of stairs. As I fell forward, I instinctively reached out and grabbed onto one of the guys walking up. I ended up taking him and two other people down with me, earning myself a great many disgusted glares as I dusted myself off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 315

You deserved it 8 038

perdix 29

Tuesday 5 April 2011 16:41

Spilling cherry pop after getting your cherry popped? There's just something poetically beautiful about that.

awardZu 0

Tuesday 5 April 2011 16:04

You should be more careful when you do you walk of shame. It's a proud tradition, and you have tainted it with cherry coke. Shame on you!

Comments

CAPTmok 7

Tuesday 5 April 2011 17:06

I think everyone woke up saw u and what happened.... damn I feel sorry for you now

shift_love 13

Tuesday 5 April 2011 17:09

mmm cherry coke. that's all I can think of now that I've read this. mmm creamy beige

Thomas_Rothbard 0

Tuesday 5 April 2011 17:25

too bad "walk of shame" refers to a one night stand. not gettin railed out by your bf.

Easyaccess 0

Tuesday 5 April 2011 17:27

props to ur bf....lol

HeJustKnowsBest 3

Tuesday 5 April 2011 17:35

But Powerthirst gives you BIRDS!

Jrefinne 7

Tuesday 5 April 2011 17:49

Do you now realize that it's unhealthy to drink soda?

Darkhatchling 0

Tuesday 5 April 2011 17:54

so you popped 1 cherry? or 2 cherries?

RedPillSucks 31

Tuesday 5 April 2011 17:54

@T3P33 You mean you don't have your girl douche with cherry coke afterwards?

salsalover_12 5

Tuesday 5 April 2011 17:55

wow OP just....wow you basically broke into their house then you had the nerve to open a soda while sneaking out?......don't ever procreate

kirsty777 3

Tuesday 5 April 2011 17:59

thats why it's called a walk of shame- always ends badly :)

Keywords

Embarrassing Love Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Romantic Christmas Break-ups Money Annoying Gross Ironic Argument Friends Awkward Cute Haircut Holidays Lonely Relatable Capitalism Work Bosses You're fired Cars Health Covid Cheating Jealousy Parenting Kids

The Top

Today, I followed my daughter and found out she wasn’t with friends, she was on a date. I confronted her about the lie, but she takes after her mother, a lawyer, and steamrollered over me about invading her privacy, so even though she lied, she somehow has the moral high ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 568

You deserved it 2 715

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. He knows that I love when he breathes on my neck. Just when I was about to finish, he put his lips a millimeter away from my neck and ear, and breathed, "I love how you smell like my grandmother's house." FML

I agree, your life sucks 111 811

You deserved it 9 769

The Top

Today, I went to see the new Harry Potter movie with my boyfriend. Feeling an intense need to pee, he decided to sacrifice a few minutes of the movie before the highly-anticipated final combat to get some relief. He went through the wrong door, locking himself out. Right until the end. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 813

You deserved it 1 415

Today, after shopping alone at a grocery store, I was taking my groceries back to my car when a kid grabbed one of my bags and ran. Deciding not to risk leaving the rest of my groceries stranded, I didn't chase him. Later, I realized that was the bag my credit card was in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 708

You deserved it 17 355

Today, I left my empty shower running so I could pretend I didn't still live alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 697

You deserved it 29 977

Today, I peeked through my window and trained a pair of binoculars on my neighbour's house. Every night without fail, he ends up standing in front of his window topless to flex his muscles. This time, I was surprised to instead find a note taped to the window saying, "Sorry, I'm out tonight." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 976

You deserved it 83 940

Today, it was my birthday. My girlfriend took me out to dinner. While at the restaurant, she went to the bathroom. She was then escorted out of the restaurant for having sex in said bathroom. I was sitting at our booth the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 977

You deserved it 2 598

Today, I fell off my truck and landed on one of the stakes my wife uses to keep her plants upright. I landed on it so perfectly that it went through my shorts and perfectly straight up my asshole for a good 4 inches before it snapped. My wife helpfully removed it, but I still spent a night in hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 661

You deserved it 136