Kids: Today, while eating with my kids at McDonalds, my son put his...

By downlowtooslow - 12/06/2009 04:49 - United States

Today, while eating with my kids at McDonalds, my son put his hand up and wanted me to give him a "high five." I went to give him a five, but he moved his hand at the last second and I ended up slapping him in the face. Now everyone there thinks I'm a child-beater. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 655

You deserved it 6 873

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Same thing different taste

Sorry Sharon

By Anonymous - 25/02/2023 16:00

Today, I tried to high-five someone but somehow ended up slapping them in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 635

You deserved it 239

By MommyProblems - 19/01/2014 05:17 - United States

Today, my 2-year-old son put his hand on my face, gave me a sweet kiss, and put his cheek against mine. Then he slapped me hard enough to leave a mark, laughed, and scrambled away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 037

You deserved it 6 860

By KN - 25/06/2009 14:13 - United States

Today, I went to go give my boss a high five for a job well done. I missed his hand and accidentally slapped his ass on the way down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 887

You deserved it 12 554

By Nish - 03/07/2013 08:11 - United States - Kent

Today while at my job as a store clerk, I walked by a family. I smiled at their little boy, who responded by flipping me off. As I was walking away, I looked back in time to catch his dad give him a high-five. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 751

You deserved it 4 178

By Clueless - 24/05/2009 05:01 - United States

Today, a waiter came up and and put out his hand so I gave him a high five and pounded it. He then says, "Um, that was a nice high five but I wanted your plate." FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 423

You deserved it 60 266

By jessica - 17/02/2009 23:56 - United States

Today, I was working the register at a local grocery store. A kid about 5 years old was having trouble zipping his jacket. I reached out to help him and he started screaming "No bad touch bad touch!" and kicked me in the knee. Everyone looked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 069

You deserved it 9 529

By mochiko - 09/08/2009 07:28 - United States

Today, I was at the mall with my little brother. I saw him touching some expensive objects, so I slapped his arm. I noticed he wasn't my brother when he started crying and his real mom slapped me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 483

You deserved it 56 326

I'm lovin' it

By Anonymous - 23/08/2020 17:09

Today, as usual, I worked at McDonald's. Although I tried to diffuse the situation, an old man was absolutely furious, and punched me in the face over BBQ sauce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 540

You deserved it 130

By Zora - 15/07/2012 23:13 - Norway - Bergen

Today, while shopping, my six-year-old son threw a tantrum because I wouldn't buy him a video game. I ended up having to grab his arm and leave the store. He screamed that I was kidnapping him, at which point I was socked in the face and pinned to the floor by three bystanders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 269

You deserved it 3 790

By Anonymous - 04/08/2013 00:46 - United States - Kerman

Today, I was at the store with my kids. My 5-year-old son wanted to carry the milk carton, so I let him. He dropped it and it spilled. I was really embarrassed. Then he decided to get on the floor and lick the milk off the ground. Everyone stared at me accusingly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 292

You deserved it 7 313

OmniFML 0

Friday 12 June 2009 12:03

FALCON PUNCH!

Aelaena 6

Friday 12 June 2009 12:13

You should have followed it up by saying 'chew with your mouth closed! what have i taught you?!'

Comments

IAmBridgette 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 9:53

POW RIGHT IN THE KISSER!

anon_73 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 10:10

Anyone who saw you feeding your kids McDonald's already knew you were a child abuser; the actual hitting is more metaphoric than anything.

motto_fml 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 18:26

never in this entire month have I laughed at some thing that couldn't be any more inappropriate. Thank you

shaPOW 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 20:41

If only there was a way you could alert any onlookers to the fact that it was an accident... like saying "Oh sorry! Are you ok?" Oh wait, I guess there was a way.

russianredgirl 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 21:29

LMAO

Voddy 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 23:05

Well shit, it happens. If you're REALLY that worried that people think you're a child-beater, then there's probably something funky going on that you're not acknowledging directly to yourself. Might be time to think about how you deal. Just my $0.02.

Shourai_fml 0

Monday 15 June 2009 11:25

Finally, a true FML. I laughed on this one, FYL, LOL

xxXChiiXxx 2

Monday 15 June 2009 18:07

LMFAO #21

xxXChiiXxx 2

Monday 15 June 2009 18:10

McDonalds isn't going to kill you if you eat it once or twice a month! There's nothing wrong with a small treat once in a while! You people are so freaking uptight. If that kid shouldn't have Mickey D's, then I guess that means no ice cream, candy, popcorn, or whatever else kids like to snack on. :p