Intimacy: Today, while getting pretty intimate with my newlywed wife in...

By Anonymous - 29/08/2012 21:37 - United States

Today, while getting pretty intimate with my newlywed wife in the car, a cop turned his lights on. As he was walking up, I was trying to get my pants back on but they wouldn't fit over my knees. The cop just laughed and walked away. Turns out my wife had my pants on and I was trying to put hers on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 327

You deserved it 7 854

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Same thing different taste

By suzanneallen - 11/09/2009 04:23 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around in his car when things got hot and heavy and we decided to climb in the back. After we finished we started to put our clothes back just as a someone's brights flooded into the car. It was a cop, and he had been there the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 127

You deserved it 40 964

By loveade11 - 12/01/2010 19:28 - France

Today, a police officer caught my girlfriend and me having sex. The officer was my dad, and we were butt naked in his new Ford Expedition. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 718

You deserved it 35 589

Kinda sus

By kmf - 10/08/2009 19:06 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were starting to get hot and heavy in my truck at our favorite park. We started going at it and we were both butt naked when I saw a car pull into the lot. Not only was it a cop car, but the first thing the cop asked my girlfriend was, "Are you being held against your will?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 145

You deserved it 14 379

By just_a_bit_akwRd - 04/08/2009 04:15 - United States

Today, I was putting on my new pair of jeans, when my girlfriend walked in. She found the "XS" size sticker on the side of my pants, held it for a little while then put it on my crotch. She then looked at me, gave a little shrug and half-smile and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 684

You deserved it 7 813

By anonymous - 03/06/2013 04:41 - United States - Banner Elk

Today, feeling the need to spice things up in our sex life, I dressed up in my husband's navy uniform jacket, hat, and a pair of heels. When he came into the room, he took one look at me and started laughing uncontrollably. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 959

You deserved it 18 299

Caught red-handed

By Anonymous - 30/11/2020 20:04

Today, my girlfriend and I got busted by the cops having sex in a dark parking lot near the beach. As if that wasn't bad enough, as I was trying to talk my way out of a ticket, one of the cops peeks into the car window and I hear my girlfriend awkwardly giggle and say, "Hi daddy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 764

You deserved it 722

By Anonymous - 01/03/2011 16:21 - United States

Today, me and my girlfriend were getting at it, and then my parents came home. I heard them and we scrambled to get our clothes on. My dad came into the room and found me wearing her pants inside out with her thong around my legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 046

You deserved it 45 871

By fuck my arse - 08/08/2013 22:15 - United Kingdom - Reading

Today, my husband and I were fooling around, and things got heated. In the heat of things, I told him to tear my panties off. He took it literally and yanked at them with all his might. It's been two hours and I still can't walk straight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 501

You deserved it 19 560

By limecat - 06/10/2009 07:12 - United States

Today, I was stopped by a cop while walking down the street. He was slowly trailing me before pulling along side of me and asking how my night was going. He then said, "You know I can't let you do this. Know those new jeans you bought? The sticker is still on the leg" and drove off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 309

You deserved it 37 010

Night on the tiles

By Anonymous - 07/04/2022 18:00

Today, my wife got drunk and stopped for a pee against the wheel of a parked police car, with three coppers and a dog inside it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 010

You deserved it 227

Kriyptic 8

Thursday 30 August 2012 8:45

At least the cop walked away and you didn't get arrested. Congrats on getting married though OP. Hopefully you have a great marriage.

Sunkissedgal 6

Thursday 30 August 2012 9:00

Now I see who wears the pants in the relationship.

Comments

Inapprehensible 11

Thursday 30 August 2012 10:48

I understand people today want to spice up their love life, but when it comes to sex keep it in the bedroom to risk yourself of embarrassment. The fact that the cop caught you and walked off laughing... You got lucky, OP. But that cop has a story to tell once he get's back to his buddies.

Kallian_fml 21

Thursday 30 August 2012 23:04

Keeping your sex life in the bedroom is just plain boring. Plus some people get turned on by the idea that they could get caught.

viper8608 9

Thursday 30 August 2012 11:05

I find this a my life is ******* awesome post rather then an FML post

bReLiNg 18

Thursday 30 August 2012 12:04

Maybe your salute caught him off gaurd, and made it too akward for him to give you a ticket.

nico139 4

Thursday 30 August 2012 18:06

Awkward

astralvagan 20

Thursday 30 August 2012 13:33

Actually sounds like a cool cop who, at one time or another, might have been in your situation. Congrats on your marriage also!

lokman_fml 7

Thursday 30 August 2012 14:06

Not really an FML story because you only had fun and had no bad consequences. Congrats on landing a wife who is happy to fool around in the car! :)

patrick29 1

Thursday 30 August 2012 14:23

Beats going to jail..

humorizer 14

Thursday 30 August 2012 14:33

At least we know who wears the pants in this relationship.

SrakaSrakasta 20

Thursday 30 August 2012 14:48

So you have a wife, a sexlife, a car AND you didn't get fined? Yeah, your life really sucks hard.

shockwave259 6

Thursday 30 August 2012 16:18

I really don't see how this is an fml. funny story though.

yesyesnonono 10

Thursday 30 August 2012 16:19

So what you're telling me is, you'd rather get busted and become a registered sex offender rather than have something to laugh about?

astralvagan 20

Thursday 30 August 2012 17:51

That's not what he said. He said that he tried to get dressed before the cop got there and just happened to grab the wrong set of pants.... As far as I know, you don't become a sex offender for having sex with your wife in your car.... At least not in America

SoultheWolf 19

Thursday 30 August 2012 18:48

wtf? You can't become a sex offender unless the person is underaged or being forced to have sex. Having it with your wife or girlfriend is perfectly fine. But you can get ticketed for indicency if it is in a place where people can see what you are doing.