By Anonymous - 13/10/2012 11:37 - United States

Today, while my husband and I are both stuck in the bathroom from food poisoning, our 3-year-old son is taking advantage of his freedom. All I can hear is banging noises and wild laughter. I'm afraid to leave the bathroom. FML
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You deserved it 2 775
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Top comments

pinkalicious224 7

Call someone to come pick him up. Then you and your husband can get well and clean up the messes he made.

143 2

Comments

perdix 29

Bring him into the bathroom with you. That'll shut the little ****** up, or cause even wilder laughter.

63 12
gc327072 30

He will never be able to unsee the horrors of "two parents one toilet"

48 4
lelo007 11

Yea. I agree with a couple of others who have posted. You should have a family member or close friend come pick your little one up (if that's available to you), that way you two can be sick and not have to worry about the tornado of destruction your toddler may or may not be causing. Sorry to hear about your luck, OP. FYL, indeed, and I hope you feel better soon!

15 3
fj19 9

I'm at work trying to recover from the same thing. I'm a security guard stuck in the restroom. **** my clients; they're on their own!!!

4 21
DogsPaw 16

You should get fired just for that last part. **** the people that probably pay you?

7 1
DocBastard 38

That's not food poisoning. You're both severely hungover from your wild party last night. You should know better than to engage in such bacchanalian shenanigans with a 3-year old in the house. That's right, bacchanalian! Look it up. FML is educational now!

41 53
Psych101 9

"FML is educational now." Let's be honest, FML has been educational for quite some time. Thanks, Grammar Nazis!

21 2
DogsPaw 16

Lots of top FMLers being thumbed down on this one.

4 1
Llama_Face89 33

Using big words on the Internet... We can all dream I suppose.

4 1
CaptainSaveAHoe 11

FML has been more educational than an english class since I got on here. I do more reading and grammar on here than I did in english. Its like in english, bitch please a red mark isn't gona make me change. But on FML if you make a mistake in your grammar, may god have mercy on your soul.

8 1
randomhangul 4

I learned that term in ap lit the other day! yay sycncronicity! (My apologies if I spelt that wrong) learning is awesome 8)

0 0
Scarshadow101 6

Oh my. That's never good. You should probably go back to Parenting 101, because if your child is making those noises, you for SURE go out and make sure he's okay. Those noises might not even be him. For all you know, some insane killer has entered your house and is throwing your stuff around. FYL for having such a creepy child (IF it is the child...).

2 37
sierra142 19

I'm pretty sure they know the sound of their own child's laughter. It's easy to say go out and check when you're not the one stuck in the bathroom with food poisoning. Judgmental much?

16 1
foshizzle82 7

23 - how is the child creepy? He's just running amuck because no ones there telling him he can't. I don't think him being left alone is a good idea, seeing as he's only a child and could hurt himself. But calling him creepy is actually pretty mean. He's just being a kid.

6 1
Scarshadow101 6

I'm not calling the kid insane or anything, I'm just saying that most three year olds don't scream insanely, like OP said. Sorry if my comment offended you, it's just I come from a family where if the child isn't being watched, there's a problem. Someone should always be watching the kid, just in case.

1 14
zombiekitten87 12

Three-year-olds do scream insanely. They're 3. It's what they do

12 1
DocBastard 38

Scarshadow - OP said "wild" screaming, not insane. ALL 3-year olds scream like that. In my house, if I can hear my kids, they're ok. When they're silent, that's when I get nervous.

16 2
Scarshadow101 6

Dear me, I'm terribly sorry for posting my opinion about this FML here. It's not like this is a comment board, right? Who gave me the freedom to say something? My mistake.

3 25
dajojonater 3

You guys are using the bathroom at the same time? Cool.

3 11
eggmarie 25

Some houses have more than one bathroom...?

10 2
KiddNYC1O 20

Even apartments! :O

0 0