Miscellaneous: Today, while my mother's blind friend was waiting in our kitchen... - FML

By Anonymous - 22/10/2012 00:29 - United States - Bellingham

Today, while my mother's blind friend was waiting in our kitchen for my mom to come home, I thought it would be funny to talk to her in the nude. Turns out she's only blind in one eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 555

You deserved it 59 126

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 05/02/2018 19:00

Today, my boyfriends mom walked in on us having sex. She is partially blind so she couldn’t tell what was going on. She had a full conversation while he was still inside me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 155

You deserved it 887

Let it all dangle

By Anonymous - 08/10/2023 07:30 - United States

Today, my 76 year-old mother-in-law stayed the night at our house. I bumped into her on the way to the bathroom during the night. She discovered I sleep naked. Sadly, I found out that she does, too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 350

You deserved it 785

By seaweedlady - 21/06/2011 14:49 - United States

Today, my mother tried to have a conversation with me. While she was taking a piss. With the bathroom door wide open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 989

You deserved it 4 875

Just a question

By Anonymous - 14/12/2019 14:00

Today while I was about to go into the shower, my mom walked in on me while I was naked. She looked down and asked me if I was cold. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 074

You deserved it 258

By ahhhhhh - 12/02/2015 17:23 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, I made my mom breakfast in bed for her birthday. She was naked when I went to give it to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 638

You deserved it 6 501

By Anonymous - 02/03/2013 06:22 - United States - Lacey

Today, I was at my class's band concert. Before the curtain was raised, I helped haul the piano to a different spot so a girl who would've had to stand behind it could be seen. I said, "There, now your mom can see you play!" She responded with, "My mom's blind." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 205

You deserved it 4 072

Are you new here?

By rent-a-cop - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Canada - Toronto

Today, as a condominium security guard, I had to enter an old lady's apartment to supervise the mandatory maintenance taking place inside. I commented on the lakeside view from her window and mentioned, "This is a pretty nice view up here isn't it?" It turns out that she's blind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 216

You deserved it 7 391

By Imretarded - 24/05/2009 05:18 - United States

Today, I saw my mom naked as she came out of the shower. I realized that's the first time I've ever seen a naked woman. I'm a 24 year old guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 966

You deserved it 13 577

Hustlin' 24/7

By Catherine - 23/05/2011 19:33 - United States

Today, I had to go to the emergency room with vision problems. The nurse was helping my mom fill out the paperwork. When asked for her employer, my mom started trying to sell the nurse Aflac, and got into a serious 10 minute conversation about it, all while I'm going blind in my left eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 506

You deserved it 3 215

By Anonymous - 14/06/2013 00:30 - United Kingdom - Southampton

Today, my dad was teasing me, saying a guy would have to be blind to go on a date with me. I then introduced him to my new, visually impaired boyfriend. He hasn't stopped laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 177

You deserved it 7 060

Next

Top comments

vocaloidtiger 12

Monday 22 October 2012 9:02

I'm sorry, but what would you accomplish by doing that even if she WAS fully blind?

anzie_fml 9

Monday 22 October 2012 9:02

You didn't see that one coming.

Comments

Rommel1942 9

Tuesday 23 October 2012 4:46

The "YDI"s.. THEY'RE OVER 9000!

manaallovesfmls 19

Tuesday 23 October 2012 5:22

Idiot.

KiddNYC1O 20

Tuesday 23 October 2012 5:41

I think that's pretty funny although you've failed.

Airforcewife_kc 5

Tuesday 23 October 2012 5:59

Happy Monday for the one eyed blind woman!

Minnesots 3

Tuesday 23 October 2012 6:40

How the hell do you thing she got there?!

BellaBelle_fml 23

Tuesday 23 October 2012 10:31

This is FML, the name of the site has '****' in it, why would you even feel the need to censor 'Dick'? And a poor attempt at that.

BoratSagdiyev 2

Tuesday 23 October 2012 11:22

Blind in one eye and saw one-eye.

NoahEibon 11

Tuesday 23 October 2012 13:38

your fault for being an ass.

Derrrrrrp32 6

Tuesday 23 October 2012 16:44

Haha is anyone ever as blind as they claim to be?

justaguyonfmlya 9

Wednesday 24 October 2012 6:02

You deserve it you sick ****

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The Top

Today, my brother-in-law is a complete toxic asshole who makes me have panic attacks. He nitpicks my house non-stop and always puts me down. I'm a normal, good person, but all I want now is for him to suffer greatly in life for all the horrible things he has said to me and about me. FML

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Today, I was wearing my yoga pants for my boyfriend. He's infatuated with them. He claims they make my ass look nice. I found out it's because I constantly get a camel toe, and it gives him a semi every time he sees it. I found this out by listening to him and his father at dinner. FML

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The Top

Today, I was having a deep conversation with a woman at a bus stop about philosophy. Little did I know, her boyfriend was rummaging through my purse while she kept my focus. I’m a PhD candidate in philosophy, and it was the best conversation I’d had it months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 156

You deserved it 245

Today, I asked a guy if I could finally meet his mom after we’ve been exclusive for almost a year now. He goes, "You’re special, but you’re not THAT special." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 471

You deserved it 513

Today, I’m realising that at some point I should have just settled for the guys who were there, instead of waiting for the fantasy perfect guy. All my exes are happily married with grown kids, whereas I’m in my 50’s, never married, no kids or grandkids, and will probably die alone with my cat eating my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 446

You deserved it 1 181

Today, halfway through a blowjob, my girlfriend bit my penis because she suddenly decided that she was still annoyed at me for an argument we had last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 350

You deserved it 334

Today, I felt something wet and warm on my arm. I looked down and saw a kid with his mouth attached to my arm. Didn't expect that out of a third grader. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 625

You deserved it 707

Today, I was eating at my aunt's place with all my cousins and the salad had little green and alive bugs. I didn't want to cause attention, so I tried to pick some off and just kept eating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 526

You deserved it 722