Miscellaneous: Today, while on vacation, I called my home phone to check the... - FML

By Anonymous - 01/09/2013 23:55 - United States

Today, while on vacation, I called my home phone to check the messages. Someone answered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 181

You deserved it 2 821

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Same thing different taste

Thanks mom

By Anonymous - 27/01/2017 00:00

Today, I checked my inbox and realized I got an email from a potential employer, saying they were having trouble getting a hold of me by phone. They called while my mom was using my phone to look up directions to a place, and she answered, kindly hanging up when they asked for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 674

You deserved it 487

By Sleepy - 31/05/2015 15:51 - United States - Apo

Today, the phone kept ringing so I picked it up and answered. When there was no response, it took a minute to realize that I was still in bed and talking to my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 483

You deserved it 5 037

By that one anon - 07/05/2015 06:27 - United States - San Diego

Today, I called one of my old coworkers to see how she was doing. My boyfriend answered the phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 957

You deserved it 2 555

By xoccerplaya - 06/10/2011 10:46 - United States

Today, I forgot what I was doing while listening to a voicemail and started talking back to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 532

You deserved it 11 324

By callerid - 03/08/2009 11:45 - United States

Today, I had misplaced my cell phone. I decided the best course of action would be to dial the number from my house phone and wait for it to ring to locate it. Somebody answered when I called. It wasn't the wrong number and I had a brief conversation with the man that stole my phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 438

You deserved it 3 789

Wish you were here

By taylor124 - 22/08/2009 05:03 - United States

Today, I listened to a voicemail from my mom about how she misses me and can't wait to see me when I get back from vacation. Thinking she hung up, my mother then had a conversation with my aunt about how quiet the house is without me and how she'd be blessed if I didn't come home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 092

You deserved it 2 879

By noway6000 - 03/03/2009 16:49 - United States

Today, my parents left for work before I had to leave for school and I decided to skip. I stayed by the phone, expecting the school to call so I could pose as my parent and excuse my absence. The phone rings and I pick up. It's my Mom, calling to leave my dad a message on the machine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 569

You deserved it 94 767

Controlling

By Anonymous - 01/07/2023 09:00 - United Kingdom

Today, even though I was very clear before I went on holiday that I was going completely zero contact to de-stress, my mother rang at least twice a day. When I stopped answering the phone, she found the direct number of the local police station in a foreign country and sent them to find me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 950

You deserved it 109

By lonely - 05/02/2009 15:14 - United States

Today, my phone rang for the first time in four days. It was my mom. She dialed the wrong number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 614

You deserved it 3 267

Bye then!

By Anonymous - 13/12/2020 18:57 - Mexico - Garza Garcia

Today, while on holiday. I got a call to let me know my job will be gone away when I return. FML

I agree, your life sucks 970

You deserved it 96

Next

Top comments

ClaireWinchester 17

Monday 2 September 2013 8:54

If it was a robber they clearly aren't very smart

slooby_fml 25

Monday 2 September 2013 8:54

"I will find you. And I will kill you."

Comments

iAlissa 34

Monday 2 September 2013 9:00

Best call the police, and in the future, perhaps consider someone house-watching.

Nyx_fml 23

Monday 2 September 2013 9:05

Well, if this was a robber, it clearly wasn't a smart robber. We all know you're supposed to let the phone ring, and then disconnect it and steal it too.

unlucky_lucy 17

Monday 2 September 2013 9:12

Because robbing someone's house secretly is just too easy now a days they answer the phone

JulianaBlackburn 19

Monday 2 September 2013 9:38

Why on Earth would an intruder answer the phone?!

Danielle7994 18

Monday 2 September 2013 9:53

Because being secretive is too mainstream

blackwidowtaco 31

Monday 2 September 2013 9:55

Hopefully this incident will motivate you to have an alarm system installed once you return.

8born8 18

Monday 2 September 2013 10:29

The awkward moment when you call a number actually wanting to speak to a machine and you get a real person. When you get back (providing you're on good terms with you neighbors) ask around to see if anyone noticed anybody unfamiliar, or suspicios loitering around your house

viper8608 9

Monday 2 September 2013 10:46

this is how horror movies start

hbake 13

Monday 2 September 2013 10:49

I have no idea what i would do if that happened to me. You might wanna hire Liam Neeson.

the_real_dvd 21

Monday 2 September 2013 11:31

What I found most shocking out of all this is not just that you have a home phone, but that you didn't forward it to your cell. This is 2013 you know..

rawme21 12

Monday 2 September 2013 11:39

I'm really curious about the follow-up!

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The Top

Today, someone burgled my hotel room. As always, I had locked my passport, extra cash, and other valuables in the closet safe, so I thought the losses would be superficial. What a discovery that the safe hadn't been fastened to the closet shelf, so the thief just picked it up and took it home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 086

You deserved it 3 096

Today, I went to see a movie with my best friend, and there were three girls loudly discussing blowjob techniques. I texted my boyfriend about how gross the conversation was. His reply was, "Pay attention. You might learn something." FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 371

You deserved it 29 703

The Top

Today, I went on the first date of my life. I also burped during my first kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 189

You deserved it 7 961

Today, while getting ice cream with a friend, her car got broken into. Nothing was taken except my backpack, which contained assignments making up 50% or more for grades in four separate classes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 144

You deserved it 2 912

Today, my officemate used the telephone beside my desk again. I still can't think of a better way to tell him how awful bad his breath is without the having to do it personally. We've been workmates for a year now and he still hasn't gotten a clue, despite of me covering my nose every time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 684

You deserved it 590

Today, I was driving in my car with my daughter, who was eating a nutri-grain bar. After a while she holds out her hand saying, "It's on my finger! I don't wanna eat it!" I pick up the little piece of nutri-grain filling and put it in my mouth, only to realize it was a large booger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 557

You deserved it 27 578

Today, I spent 15 minutes trying to get my cat out of our seven-foot Christmas tree. Once he was done, he tore about the house and broke the nativity scene, beheading baby Jesus and a wise man in the process. The tree is fucked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 537

You deserved it 880

Today, I heard my downstairs neighbor being beaten by her husband. I anonymously called 911, hoping to help. She must've seen me giving the cops my statement because as soon as they left, she knocked on my door and punched me square in the face while screaming, "Mind your own business bitch!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 367

You deserved it 409