Intimacy: Today, while out for dinner with my parents, a woman, approximately...

By Anonymous - 17/10/2014 10:13 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, while out for dinner with my parents, a woman, approximately the same age as my mother, repeatedly propositioned me for sex during the course of my meal. After declining firmly several times, she only stopped after my mother convinced her I was gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 667

You deserved it 4 179

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Denial

By TedX - 19/08/2020 20:07

Today, at 18, I finally told my mom I was gay. She spent the rest of the day bringing up my "future wife" at every possible chance she had. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 657

You deserved it 247

Not an ally, then

By acorn - 08/08/2009 23:59 - United States

Today, I was on the phone with my mother making arrangements to go to a dinner tonight where I will be honored for my political activism. She made it clear she's only going for me, and does NOT support the gay rights group that is putting the dinner on. I was planning on coming out after dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 815

You deserved it 7 831

Nice try

By bigmouth - 02/08/2009 07:35 - United States

Today, I was working as a host at a pasta diner. The hostess I was working with was very attractive and we were flirting quite a bit. A large woman walked in to be seated, and I leaned over to her and dared her to ask the woman if she wanted two chairs. She leaned back and said, "That's my mom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 812

You deserved it 76 270

By peacock_mina19 - 11/02/2009 00:08 - United States

Today, my mother and I got into a huge fight about me being a lesbian. It ended with me saying "Fuck you!" to which she responded: "I bet you'd probably like to." FML

I agree, your life sucks 89 008

You deserved it 27 170

Thanks mom

By Anonymous - 14/02/2021 14:01 - Colombia

Today, my mom decided it was a good idea to remind me about my non-existent sex life while all the family was having dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 039

You deserved it 108

Tsk Tsk

By whatiswrongwiththeworld - 14/07/2017 13:01

Today, I was told off by a random woman who said that I should be ashamed of myself for dating such an older man. I was having dinner with my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 920

You deserved it 290

Tactical nuke

By not getting laid - 13/10/2013 14:38 - United States - San Antonio

Today, I was hitting on a girl, and I was sure I could get her to sleep with me. When she finally gave in and was putting her number into my phone, she called my mom and asked her if she raised me to "sexually harass women." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 305

You deserved it 93 896

By crawfo - 31/08/2009 13:54 - Australia

Today, whilst on a date I recieved my sixth missed call from my mother. I excused myself and went outside and called her, she and my father wanted to know why I was having dinner and holding hands with another man. It turns out they were also on a date. At the same place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 337

You deserved it 12 071

By Syferix - 18/03/2009 22:42 - United States

Today, I was leaving to go over to a friend's and my parents suddenly ask if I'm gay. I reply that no, I'm bisexual. My mom then asks if I've ever made out with someone of the same sex and I say yes. She turns to my dad and says 'I told you so. You owe me $20'. My parents bet on my sexuality. FML

I agree, your life sucks 110 656

You deserved it 27 061

By Anonymous - 25/02/2013 16:14 - United States

Today, my mom tried to convince my dad that I was a lesbian. Why? Because she was bored. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 683

You deserved it 3 886

Aquaman911 18

Friday 17 October 2014 17:13

She should respect your decision, men don't want to have sex all the time with anyone!

CanyonRose 16

Friday 17 October 2014 17:13

Fyl but your mom is a savior in the weirdest way. Unless you are gay then your mom is still savior.

Comments

MissBehavin77 18

Friday 17 October 2014 19:18

Would you have said yes if your parents hadn't of been right there?

Mortoli 30

Wednesday 22 October 2014 14:14

Almost any man would have. Lol. Except married men of course.

Mortoli 30

Wednesday 22 October 2014 14:20

Unless she like 50 then heck no. 40s maybe 30s definitely.

dammityou 10

Friday 17 October 2014 19:38

while I'm over here, virgin at the age of 28 and not a single chance of that happening. **** you and FML

mangelon86 15

Friday 17 October 2014 19:53

Where did you go eat??

jeanyrios 10

Friday 17 October 2014 20:36

what the hell? And you are expected to be a gentleman?

skittyskatbrat 19

Saturday 18 October 2014 0:51

she's banking on him being a gentleman. If it happens again, I highly recommend he embarrass her if she won't back off and finish by getting the manager to remove her from the premises. Make sure others can hear him turn her down for sex. "I do not know you and, may I repeat, I will NOT accept your offer of sex. Once again, leave us alone so we can enjoy our dinner." Followed promptly by asking the next employee nearby to bring the manager.....

MidnaLink 33

Friday 17 October 2014 20:36

I like how your mom stopped her. I don't like her needing to tell her you were gay to do it.

martin8337 35

Friday 17 October 2014 20:42

If she was even kinda good looking, you should have gone for it. The old broad could have done things to you that have never been done to you before.

MidnaLink 33

Saturday 18 October 2014 0:12

You disgust me. You basically welcome sexual harassment.

martin8337 35

Saturday 18 October 2014 6:54

It's all about the nookie.

MidnaLink 33

Saturday 18 October 2014 15:40

Yeah, well maybe he'll welcome it from someone who'd not be the same age as mama.

8born8 18

Saturday 18 October 2014 16:49

#48, you are 51yrs old. So this "Old Broad" would probably be right up your alley. However, living surreptitiously through a young person by telling them to go for it, won't bring back your glory days.