Miscellaneous: Today, while out jogging, I was suddenly hit with unbelievable...

By hbt51 - 17/08/2015 19:56 - United States - Blue Ridge

Today, while out jogging, I was suddenly hit with unbelievable gastric distress. I wasn't wearing brown pants when I set out on that jog, but I sure was when I made it back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 027

You deserved it 1 948

New Year, New Blunders
Celebrate the New Year with stories of resolutions broken in less than 24 hours and memorable New Year's Eves... for all the wrong reasons! More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 04/07/2012 13:48 - Canada - Bolton

Today, I went for a jog. I was 5 km away from home when I had a sudden urge to poop. I didn't want to use the bushes, so I thought I could hold it in. I was wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 757

You deserved it 5 810

By Anonymous - 16/02/2012 03:59 - United States

Today, feeling out of shape, I went for a jog. I got mugged. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 296

You deserved it 2 904

Almost there, we're almost there…

By Anonymous - 26/09/2020 08:02 - United States - Rockaway Park

Today, I was rushing to walk home because my stomach was upset. I dodged multiple people, getting closer and closer, got my front door open, got up my stairs, and then lost control of my bowels on the top step. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 367

You deserved it 104

Hear this?

By soundslikeadumbcommentersituation - 11/07/2014 20:34 - Canada - Brampton

Today, while in my backyard, I had some insane gastric distress. I let out a fart so powerful that it made me yelp in pain, and left my asshole numb. A second later, I heard a cough come from over my neighbor's fence. I had to quietly limp back into my house in shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 849

You deserved it 6 934

Raincheck?

By jib - 09/04/2022 07:00 - United States - Kilgore

Today, I was suffering from some gastric distress. While on my way to a job interview, I slipped on some concrete that was wet due to a recent slight rain shower. I didn't fall. I DID shit my pants though. I walked back home slowly in shame to clean up the mess. I didn't make it to the interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 026

You deserved it 132

Pushing the envelope

By Anonymous - 02/04/2022 04:00

Today, I was constipated and strained so hard that I threw up into my pants and all over my shoes. I was at work, and no, I didn’t have a change of clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 961

You deserved it 180

By teapotrevolt - 02/03/2015 20:40 - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, while laughing at a jogger that fell down while running, I choked on my French fries. They had to give me the Heimlich maneuver. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 494

You deserved it 54 243

Poot

By dumblonde76 - 14/09/2021 07:00 - United States - Jackson

Today, I had a rumble in my tummy whilst picking up groceries. I tried to let out a little poot, but ended up shitting in my pants. I had to leave without the groceries. FML

I agree, your life sucks 904

You deserved it 382

By Anonymous - 02/08/2013 21:34 - United Kingdom - Newcastle Upon Tyne

Today, at work, I felt a sudden, all-too-familiar pain in my stomach. I ran for the restroom, but before I could get there, I shat myself. I had to limp the rest of the way, then beg my boss to let me go home. He said no and told me to get back to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 022

You deserved it 5 405

Running

By Anonymous - 13/09/2014 00:19 - United States - Farmingdale

Today, I ran one of the hardest cross-country courses in the country. I'm a pretty good runner, and I was feeling confident for the first mile. Then the Chipotle from last night's dinner hit, and my legs weren't the only thing running. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 031

You deserved it 9 865

cheezter 15

Tuesday 18 August 2015 7:26

Never ever ever tell anyone about this

MyNameIsLaughter 18

Tuesday 18 August 2015 7:30

I hate it when this happens! I try to drink a good amount of water and do jumping jacks, and small exercises to warm up before my runs to make sure nothing is gonna get loose on the run. Hope the next run is better OP

Comments

worldclassrager 39

Tuesday 18 August 2015 8:12

Congrats on the post but I think this one should have been under wraps...change your info if you decide to follow up...you'll never live this down if you are found...

Khepre 22

Tuesday 18 August 2015 8:13

And this is why I run at night. The darkness hides me... *ominous musics plays* ... Also hides if I shit my pants...

beeferjay 34

Tuesday 18 August 2015 8:15

you shat your pants?

Smooth_Criminal 24

Tuesday 18 August 2015 14:25

No, he fell in the mud.

Amateur_Dank 17

Tuesday 18 August 2015 8:17

Hey, at least you made it.

Miss_Mandi 29

Tuesday 18 August 2015 8:30

Reminds me of the girl that did a marathon while bleeding freely into her underwear/pants.

greeneyedx 23

Tuesday 18 August 2015 8:56

Except that woman chose to "free bleed," OP didn't xD

Mons_fml 27

Tuesday 18 August 2015 12:59

I heard about that as well! People calling it strong and brave. I just thought to myself that thats gross and about as strong and brave as choosing to run a marathon with diarrhea. Then this FML came up. #dontletitholdyoubackgurl

lovefrog 14

Tuesday 18 August 2015 9:32

"You must be wondering, why the red suit…"-Deadpool 2015 (sorry it just reminded me)

IvyChennyChen 21

Tuesday 18 August 2015 10:03

shit happens, OP hahaa but all jokes aside I hope you're feeling better!

pdp_fml 21

Tuesday 18 August 2015 11:47

Next time be sure to take some toilet paper along to help clean up.

juturnaamo 29

Tuesday 18 August 2015 12:04

Cabin boy, bring me my brown pants! If you run enough, either this will happen to you, or you'll see it happen to someone else. I saw a guy fall out during an Army run once and come back with only one sock...he knew he wasn't going to make it back.