Transportation: Today, while riding in the car with my friends, we stopped at...

By Scarred - 04/09/2009 05:15 - United States

Today, while riding in the car with my friends, we stopped at a red light. To our left, a very obese, middle aged man slowly unbuttoned his shirt and spread it out. He then stared at us while massaging his nipples with his thumb and index fingers for the duration of the red light. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 987

You deserved it 5 661

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Same thing different taste

By Noname - 08/02/2009 01:23 - United States

Today, after leaving a store I got stuck at a red light. A car pulled up next to me and there was a half retarded man jerking his junk at me. Nasty image burned into my corneas forever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 192

You deserved it 3 881

By bridezilla - 05/07/2009 04:12 - Canada

Today, I was on a train when an old man standing next to me very obviously checked me out, caught my eye, and winked. He spent the next five minutes rubbing his penis against my leg. When I turned to tell him off, the train lurched, and the old man fell face first into my breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 498

You deserved it 6 862

By scarlet - 09/05/2011 15:02 - Canada

Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing me against the divider and sliding into me on every turn. When he got up for his stop, his pants had loosened and his bare ass was staring me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 897

You deserved it 3 413

By needanewride - 16/11/2012 02:40 - United States - Newton Center

Today, I took a crowded train home. I was holding on to the rail when an old man started rubbing his crotch across my hand. I moved my hand but he moved too and kept doing it. When I moved my hand higher, he started licking it. I had to wait ten minutes for the next stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 300

You deserved it 3 316

By wench - 23/12/2010 20:39 - United States

Today, while driving, I idly started picking my nose. I looked over at the car next to me and saw a smoking hot guy from my school staring at me in disgust. He kept staring until I took a turn-off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 557

You deserved it 36 633

By Anonymous - 05/06/2009 20:54 - Denmark

Today, I was at a bar. A fat guy looks at me for a while and sits down next to me. He turns and I expect that he'll hit on me. He then buttons down his shirt, presses his man boobs together and say to his friends “Look, I’ve got bigger tits than than the girl next to me!" His friends agreed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 095

You deserved it 6 143

By iceman123432 - 02/09/2009 20:07 - United States

Today, when we were at wrestling practice, we had to bend over to stretch. When I bent down, I noticed a car on the street stopped. There was a sixty year old man watching us. He then licked his lips and drove away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 127

You deserved it 4 254

Moobs

By Anonymous - 30/06/2009 22:19 - United States

Today, I met with a friend who had gained some weight since I saw him last. After a friendly hug, I put my hand on his new man boob and, without thinking, left it there way too long. I realized that I was groping him and, in a panic, did the only thing I could think of. I patted it. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 009

You deserved it 54 701

By Anonymous - 26/08/2010 23:41 - United States

Today, I was riding the public bus and a really fat, smelly guy sat next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and asked me if I was single. My stop wasn't for three more miles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 893

You deserved it 3 721

By Anonymous - 31/12/2012 07:58 - United States

Today, while helping out at a retirement home, I had to get a book off a bookshelf. When I reached up, my watch got stuck on my shirt, resulting in my shirt lifting up. I just flashed my man-boobs to at least 20 senior citizens, and one of them even asked if he could have a feel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 711

You deserved it 6 549

24788 6

Friday 4 September 2009 12:11

And people told me my reverse tinted windows were a bad idea...

Artanias 0

Friday 4 September 2009 12:15

Bwahahahahahaha, thats so awesome, the obese guy is instantly my favourite person in the world. Also FYL indeed, even if i think what the guy did is brilliant :P

Comments

rosierosierosie 0

Friday 4 September 2009 16:12

you loved it.

myhairynutsack 0

Friday 4 September 2009 16:30

If it really happened (and I have my doubts), YDI for looking.

rosemary_fml 5

Friday 4 September 2009 17:27

i bet it was like a train wreck.

canucksrule88 0

Friday 4 September 2009 17:45

Oh....sorry for your 1 minute of hell that nobody forced you to look at

girlskill 0

Friday 4 September 2009 18:01

HAHAHAHA that is hilarious not an fml at all, more like a "my day was amazing"

jc21_fml 1

Friday 4 September 2009 18:09

HAHA that guy is ******* awesome

sodahhhr 0

Friday 4 September 2009 18:28

was he in a red 2003 mazda?

Subjectzero 0

Friday 4 September 2009 18:30

sounds like you kept staring. you should have tried to laugh. he was doing it so that he could ********** to your reactions later, you do eealize that right?

Nakedsquirrel 5

Friday 4 September 2009 18:53

YDI. You either watched the whole thing, or kept looking back to see what he was doing. You subjected yourself to it either way. Idiot. Though my first reaction was that this is bullshit and I still think it is.

Intoxicunt 5

Friday 4 September 2009 19:01

It was Plexico. He just wanted a blumpkin! Jeez. Where is screwtaylor? She should be doing this.

plexico 3

Friday 4 September 2009 19:43

It wasn't me this time around, but it's giving me ideas! I gotta get a CD of **** background music and take the tint off my windows. Coming soon to a red light near you!

Intoxicunt 5

Friday 4 September 2009 20:24

Haha. That sounds...ineffective at best. Unless you're really sexy, which, for all I know, you may be. The **** music is a really nice touch. New meaning to "red light district", huh?

plexico 3

Friday 4 September 2009 20:32

What am I going to have to do to make the show work? Maybe if I had a female co-star sitting low in the backseat reaching around and massaging my nipple as I make the exaggerated fake ****** faces? Any volunteers? From the Volunteer State?

Intoxicunt 5

Friday 4 September 2009 20:47

Well, you could always drive an ice cream truck. You like the MILF action, and lots of moms go out to the ice cream truck to buy stuff for their kids... That actually sounds like something I would do. So yeah, I volunteer. You know, the best wingpeople are the opposite sex from the person trying to "hook up" with someone. So maybe I could just get in your car with a bunch of other girls and make you look all the more desirable.