By BDSM4Jesus - 20/01/2015 04:42 - United States - Pittsburgh

Spicy
Today, while trying some new kinky things with my boyfriend, he cried out, "Call me Jesus!" Yeah... I think we're done with that. FML
I agree, your life sucks 35 152
You deserved it 4 555
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Top comments

Storvolleng 28

do the next best thing and shout "oh god!" he would be so pissed if you said his fathers name!

302 9
Excelz 10

Jesus should already be inside you anyway.

245 25

Comments

Storvolleng 28

do the next best thing and shout "oh god!" he would be so pissed if you said his fathers name!

302 9
Exodiafinder687 58

Well if he wants to be Jesus then she should be shouting out, "Oh, your dad! Your dad!"

17 45
buckdharma 36

Why did this get buried? It's freakin hilarious.

5 17
LaurenRoxsU 9

@38, I agree! That's why I always un-hide the negative comments. Most of the time it's just uptight dumbasses that get offended when you bring God into it. So they gather together, & thumbs down so many times it's like they're giving directions to the party at Satan's house later... Usually the negative ones are the true Awsmness.

14 3
incoherentrmblr 21

I hope your name isn't Mary, that way this doesn't turn into an Oedipus complex...

3 1
Mightyrif 23

Took me too long to understand that you weren't being racist. Well played #2.

14 53
LaLince 40

A little megalomaniac but seriously funny.

18 6
Excelz 10

Jesus should already be inside you anyway.

245 25
teentee401 36

Your comment and picture go beautifully together

72 5
Rawrshi 25

Don't you mean divinely, 13? ;)

17 1
jademitch 20

Haha, not sure Christians would be pleased with that. Unless he's Christian grey, he seems to like the 'kinky fuckery'

5 49
Smooth_Criminal 24

Christians won't know unless she tells them.

2 8
Noah197099 17

Maybe the sex was so good that he felt reborn.

65 4
ZombieSazza 34

I laughed so hard at this, thank you!!!

3 8
Soundslikeothers 15

I would a asked you to call me Moses as I part your sea.

5 29
Exodiafinder687 58

Well remember that Moses didn't just part any old sea. He parted the Red Sea. So she can only call you Moses for about 1 week every month.

94 1
KociaQ 30

Well... that makes is a good safeword :D

24 1
Enslaved 36

My safe word is: "Roxbury" Because-- Baby, don't hurt me Don't hurt me, no more

55 3
Rawrshi 25

I ******* choked. I'm totally using "Roxbury" as one of my safewords now. Bahaha.

9 1
homesuckfucker 28

Explain to him that, "biblical roleplay," isn't a turn on for you. It isn't like one kink that isn't mutual will ruin sex between you forever. On a side note, that's friggin hilarious.

9 13
JocelynKaulitz 28

I can't even tell if you're with this post or against it…

0 2
homesuckfucker 28

Let me rephrase. Hey, don't worry about it. Tell him you don't want to call him Jesus. Communication is important in a relationship. The image in my mind of a man screaming, "Call me Jesus!" mid-thrust is hilarious, though.

4 0