Miscellaneous: Today, while waiting for my train, I was listening to a voicemail...

By anna - 22/12/2011 21:25 - France

Today, while waiting for my train, I was listening to a voicemail message on my phone. Out of nowhere, a stranger came up to me from behind and screamed "DELETE!" into my ear. His voice command deleted my message. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 948

You deserved it 4 610

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Same thing different taste

By ihatelife - 14/05/2011 23:17 - Canada

Today, I was trying to listen to a phone message I'd received. I was excited because I'd been waiting for the coaches to call me back for tryouts for a week now. Trying to figure out how to listen to it, I ended up deleting it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 276

You deserved it 28 474

By Anonymous - 31/07/2009 17:01 - United States

Today, I was sitting on the train when some crazy man started talking to me. I ignored him, and he tapped on my shoulder. He started blabbing and I just pointed to my ears and mouthed, "I'm deaf." He stopped talking. A minute later my phone rang and I answered it without thinking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 080

You deserved it 75 582

High hopes

By lyssanthamum - 09/04/2009 02:35 - United States

Today, on the train, I got excited when I suddenly noticed I had a missed call and voicemail from a boy I liked. With a grin on my face, I told my friend. My dad overheard and said, "Oh sweetie, he probably had the wrong number." The voicemail was blank. I texted him. The call was indeed an accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 618

You deserved it 4 447

By xoccerplaya - 06/10/2011 10:46 - United States

Today, I forgot what I was doing while listening to a voicemail and started talking back to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 533

You deserved it 11 326

Phones, how do they work?!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, a voicemail suddenly appeared in my messages. Last week I missed a call from an Unknown caller, and no number was listed. Turns out they wanted to arrange an interview for a job I really wanted. They left a number in the voicemail, telling me to call them back that day if I was interested. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 023

You deserved it 422

By Kfeaaa - 24/02/2009 02:31 - United States

Today, I ran up to my boyfriend and gave him a kiss. I didn't understand why the girl next to him got upset, but it turns out the voicemail I deleted by accident was him breaking up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 993

You deserved it 7 583

By Anonymous - 12/08/2009 02:05 - United States

Today, my boyfriend sent me a text saying to call him. When I did, it went straight to voicemail. It was a recording of him breaking up with me. He broke up with me over the phone, without even talking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 812

You deserved it 3 291

By Anonymous - 26/07/2019 22:00

Today, I was having trouble sleeping, and I was almost asleep when I got a call from one of those spam places. They left a voicemail, which I made the mistake of listening to. The voice was so slowed down, it was very creepy, especially late at night. I don't think I'll be sleeping at all tonight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 389

You deserved it 350

By Anonymous - 20/10/2010 22:22 - United States

Today, my dad got a new phone and put me on speed dial. I have received several voice mails from him accidentally dialed. They are from him riding the train, in a meeting, having lunch, and, most recently, him taking a monstrous dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 352

You deserved it 3 324

By King_of_hearts - 04/04/2014 23:46 - United States - Plymouth

Today, my phone rang just seconds after I left a conference meeting to go use the restroom. It wouldn't have been a problem, except it seems one of my friends thought it would be funny to change my ringtone to a woman having an orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 649

You deserved it 4 835

TheSnakeDoctor20 17

Friday 23 December 2011 0:27

You should have deleted his face!

kipfischer 11

Friday 23 December 2011 0:28

That's hilarious

Comments

mamasait 1

Saturday 24 December 2011 2:55

experienced troll there.

omggtfomi 1

Saturday 24 December 2011 4:11

That's ******* hilarious I'm trying that >_<

Elmo1103lov 0

Saturday 24 December 2011 5:02

well you should scream 'delete your dick! ' n kick him in the family jewels :)

tjsomethin 9

Saturday 24 December 2011 6:01

Favorited only because of the obvious Death Note reference

masonbain93 9

Saturday 24 December 2011 6:22

I woulda deleted him.

spy1729 8

Saturday 24 December 2011 6:35

he's probably the one who left it

saxplayer9291 3

Saturday 24 December 2011 7:26

LOL

nabesh 5

Saturday 24 December 2011 8:28

That guy is funny and annoyung at the same time!

raynay22 3

Saturday 24 December 2011 18:13

sry but thats funny. hopefully it wasnt THAT important

grad2011 0

Saturday 24 December 2011 21:57

They see me trollin'.........… they hatin......

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The Top

Today, I decided it was time to lose my virginity to my boyfriend. After about ten minutes he started going faster and his stomach was slapping against mine. It was making a weird sound so I started laughing. Apparently that wasn't sexy and he went soft. My first time and we didn't even finish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 350

You deserved it 38 334

Today, I realized just how spoiled and immature my boyfriend is when I asked him several times what he’d like for dinner. Getting no answer, I made steak, potatoes and salad. He then sulked and refused to eat it, since he wanted spaghetti and meatballs instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 308

You deserved it 408

The Top

Today, I tried out a new fabric softener, thinking it would make my clothes smell like fresh mountain air. Turns out I’m allergic to it. I’m now covered in hives and smell like a pine-scented car air freshener. FML

I agree, your life sucks 374

You deserved it 91

Today, it's my birthday and it would be a great day if me and my wife weren’t literally too poor to celebrate it. To make it even better, she won’t have birthday sex with me, because we live with her mom and she’s afraid of her hearing us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 931

You deserved it 418

Today, most of my immediate family do nothing but criticise me for not breastfeeding. My mom even threatened to call CPS for child abuse, no matter how many times I explain I physically don’t produce milk, and formula feeding is literally my only option. FML

I agree, your life sucks 785

You deserved it 135

Today, I cleaned out my husband's drawer. He had kept every love letter I wrote him for the past 7 years. I smiled, struck by how romantic he was. My bliss was short-lived as I realized that he had also kept every single love letter his other lovers wrote him while we were married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 192

You deserved it 4 002

Today, I got fired from my job for harassing customers over the weekend. I didn't work over the weekend. I left my nametag there on Friday and my co-workers thought it would be funny to wear my nametag all weekend. One of them got into a fight with a customer and they took her 'name' down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 687

You deserved it 7 304

Today, I found out my son’s middle name was named after my wife’s muscled up highschool ex-boyfriend who cheated on her and who she sometimes still brings up. She tells me it’s nothing and still acts like I’m crazy for communicating my worry to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 232

You deserved it 154

Same thing different taste

High hopes

Phones, how do they work?!

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