Miscellaneous: Today, while walking my dog at the park, I spotted my crush and...

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By fmlman - 15/03/2013 05:44 - United States - Rawlins

Today, while walking my dog at the park, I spotted my crush and said "Hi!" By not paying attention where I was going, I tripped and fell down. My dog started humping me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 389

You deserved it 6 390

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By Anonymous - 17/01/2025 20:00 - Canada

Today, I was walking my big, fat, fluffy old dog when I saw my crush. I waved enthusiastically, but my dog chose that moment to squat down and unleash a string of poop. My crush looked horrified as I tried to scoop it up while still waving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 322

You deserved it 164

By chris - 09/06/2009 17:09 - United States

Today, I was walking my new dog and saw this girl that I've had a crush on for months. When I approached her, I tried to look 'macho' with my dog. However my dog thought it would be more attractive to pee on my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 873

You deserved it 10 791

By mraow123 - 30/05/2009 05:04 - United States

Today, I was walking my dog but every time he looked like he was about to "go", he became uninterested with the spot and kept walking. I, following behind, tripped over a bump in the sidewalk and face planted. My dog then finally urinated, all over my aching body. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 400

You deserved it 4 665

By clumsy - 07/05/2013 00:45 - United States - Murfreesboro

Today, I tried to "trip" and fall into this guy I've had a crush on. I missed and fell on my face. He stepped over me and kept walking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 849

You deserved it 54 020

So sorry!

By Anonymous - 15/04/2025 15:00 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I took my dog to the park, and he ran straight into a group of people having a picnic. Naturally, he grabbed the biggest piece of meat in sight and ran off with it. As I chased him, I tripped and fell in front of everyone. My dog then sat and chewed the meat in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 144

You deserved it 559

You OK, Human?

By Anonymous - 05/01/2025 00:00 - United States

Today, I was walking my dog when I slipped on some mud and fell onto my ass. As I fell, I let go of the leash, and my dog just stood there, staring at me in what seemed like curious judgment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 373

You deserved it 124

By anonamous - 12/03/2012 21:45 - United States

Today, I hugged my dog and kissed her on the side of the face. She responded by mauling me across my own face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 168

You deserved it 9 130

Slapstick

By Anonymous - 05/10/2023 04:00

Today, as I was on the floor playing with the dog, my husband walked past, tripped over something, and fell on me, smashing his bony elbow right into my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 633

You deserved it 138

Farm life

By FarmerGirl - 09/10/2012 18:43 - Canada - Brossard

Today, my crush and I were volunteering at a local farm. He confessed to me that I'm one of the most beautiful girls he's ever seen. Just as he leaned in to kiss me, I lost my footing and fell into a pile of horse shit. He just stood there, pointing and laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 155

You deserved it 3 709

By psh_idontbite - 13/03/2015 03:55 - United States

Today, I was walking my dog around my neighborhood, when I saw this really cute boy. My dog then saw a squirrel and dragged me through mud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 722

You deserved it 3 563

maz95 17

Friday 15 March 2013 16:01

Your dog was just showing off what your crush is missing.

electrorange 13

Friday 15 March 2013 15:58

Maybe a preview of things to come!

Comments

xTrepidation 14

Friday 15 March 2013 20:20

Your dog just helped you out. Now that your crush sees another male going after you he will get jealous and try to win you over!

slushyslime 7

Friday 15 March 2013 20:22

Neuter / spay your dog! Do you know how many dogs are put down everyday because shelters are full or they don't have enough funding. Be responsible .

akiahara 14

Friday 15 March 2013 20:25

Spayed and neutered dogs still hump. Don't assume.

docscientist 9

Friday 15 March 2013 22:21

I too dream of a tomorrow without cats or dogs.

Audem_fml 27

Friday 15 March 2013 20:25

Did he laughed and helped you or just laughed ? ;)

umyeahh 13

Friday 15 March 2013 20:43

Neuter him.

MidnightWolf3 12

Friday 15 March 2013 21:25

As 48 already pointed out, spayed and neutered dogs still hump. I've seen boys who were neutered at a young age still hump.

ChakatBlackstar 29

Friday 15 March 2013 21:41

Well at least somebody still loves you.

ethanman82 8

Friday 15 March 2013 23:25

well dog-on

ragini95 16

Friday 15 March 2013 23:29

looks like you got ******.

InhumanX 7

Saturday 16 March 2013 0:19

Man's best friend just got a little closer...

Twisted_Angel 17

Saturday 16 March 2013 1:50

Lmfao! Kodak moment right there. Look at it this way, if he noticed, at least he'll never forget you.

ouibijou 15

Saturday 16 March 2013 2:55

At least now your crush knows you're bang-able

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