Mother in law, Farts and Kids: Toot toot!

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Toot toot!

By Anonymous - 29/04/2009 10:12 - United States

Today, trying to make my 6 year-old daughter to laugh, I drew a picture of a butt, a puff of air coming out and the word "Toot". My daughter thought it extremely funny. Later, when she was talking with my extremely judgmental mother-in-law, I heard her say, "Daddy taught me how to draw butts." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 100

You deserved it 50 278

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By FattestUgliestPerson - 18/01/2014 09:45 - United Kingdom - Manchester

Today, my husband jokingly told my daughter when she passes gas in public she needs to blame it on the fattest and ugliest person there. We went shopping after and she let a HUGE fart out. She gasped, "Mommy!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 190

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By Xibalba - 01/09/2020 14:02

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I agree, your life sucks 1 337

You deserved it 477

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By Anonymous - 18/05/2024 14:00 - United Kingdom - Newcastle

Today, I discovered my 3-year-old daughter's artistic skills. She managed to draw an elaborate mural on our living room wall. The masterpiece? A stick figure family, including our dog, but instead of a tail, he has a second head. She of course used permanent markers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 386

You deserved it 167

Blasted

By coolest_mom - 25/11/2015 06:00

Today, while changing my daughter's diaper, I lifted up her butt to wipe her, which coincidentally caused her to fart. I hadn't wiped her yet so the force of air caused poop to fly at me at high speed, landing on my chest and face. My husband burst out laughing, saying, "You've been ass-blasted!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 063

You deserved it 2 973

It's true, though

By humiliated - 20/03/2016 11:54 - United Kingdom - London

Today, at the supermarket, I picked up a pack of toilet rolls, at which point my 5-year-old daughter turned to me and screamed, "A CLEAN BUTTHOLE IS A HAPPY BUTTHOLE!" in front of a dozen other people. I have no idea where she heard that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 151

You deserved it 2 363

Helpful

By Big bootay - 28/01/2019 16:00

Today, while at a restaurant, my 4 year-old son pointed at a lady and exclaimed, “Mom, her butt is even bigger than yours!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 231

You deserved it 363

Sessee 4

Wednesday 29 April 2009 20:09

Well, when I was a kid, my mom told me that lowercase M's are basically upside-down butts. Of course, I shared that with my entire kindergarten class.

lizwriteslove 0

Wednesday 29 April 2009 20:02

Good job.

Comments

SublatePandemic 0

Thursday 30 April 2009 1:16

YDI. so mature of you. :P

AK 2

Thursday 30 April 2009 1:17

Well, it's true. You can't blame her.

xClarkGable 0

Thursday 30 April 2009 1:25

YDI. Grow up, and stop teaching your child how to be disgusting.

xxmsp91 0

Thursday 30 April 2009 1:52

HA, i doubt that ur daughter will be disgusting just because she knows how to draw a butt.. U did the right thing, and made her laugh.

JFox 8

Thursday 30 April 2009 2:03

I fear for #53's children.. sounds like the type of person to regulate everything. Also, OP: That's adorable. :P

kirei_fml 0

Thursday 30 April 2009 2:16

that's adorable, how can your life be ******?! xD My dad did the same thing with me and my mother responded the same way!

mastershake 0

Thursday 30 April 2009 2:48

haha thats cute. theres nothing wrong with butts # 53. farts are funny and dads are supposed to do things like that lol

Miss_Tyff 0

Thursday 30 April 2009 3:44

Kids absorb anything you teach them/tell them and they WILL repeat it. Next time, be careful what you teach your kids if you don't want it repeated to others.

Islander_fml 5

Thursday 30 April 2009 7:37

When my twin brother was three years old, he was in the nursery at our church, and he says to the woman in charge: "I have a penis, and YOU don't! That's because I'M a boy, and YOU'RE a girl. My daddy also has a penis, and it's big and hairy!" So she told my mom, and they thought it was the funniest shit ever. :D