Health, Embarrassing, Friends and Farts: Top of the morning - FML

Top of the morning

By munnyfish - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, as I was waking up, I let out a huge morning fart. When I opened my eyes, I realized that I was crashing at a friend's place, along with four other people. Yep, they all heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 615

You deserved it 34 094

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Top comments

FreddyLunch 0

Saturday 7 November 2009 14:32

If you are a man then to be honest nobody would care.

Butcher_1419 0

Saturday 7 November 2009 14:36

your life is over. kill yourself for farting

Comments

kireee 0

Monday 27 February 2012 17:54

Man up

doglover100 28

Saturday 8 March 2014 3:43

I don't find farting that big of a deal, everyone does it.

Whitetommy 8

Tuesday 27 May 2014 10:59

no big deal. my supervisor farts in a office dinner, no one give a shit.

JCal585 8

Tuesday 2 June 2015 4:00

Whatever. People fart.

Annies 17

Saturday 17 April 2021 3:06

Why is everyone saying this isn’t an fml?? Farting (or anything having to do with the digestive system) is MEGA embarrassing. And don’t assume OP is a man just because of the icon. Not everyone can change theirs. I truly feel bad for you OP. You have my sympathy, if no one else’s.

XObunniiOX 2

Tuesday 5 September 2023 9:29

as a lady, I would have found that hysterical. bonus points if you made anyone uncomfortable!

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I was on a blind date with a girl my friend set me up with. We went to a fancy restaurant and she ordered the shrimp. I told her, "I'm allergic to shrimp, so you shouldn't order it in case I want to kiss you later." She looked at the waiter and said, "I'll have the shrimp." FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 420

You deserved it 36 034

Today, my boyfriend doesn’t like to go out, like at all. I went on a cruise earlier this year and met this guy from my school; we danced together, we talked all night long, and it was amazing. It's been nine months since, and I still haven’t got over it. I'm now questioning my entire 3-year relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 436

You deserved it 335

The Top

Today, I realized the only real accomplishment I've had in my life that I take any pride in is that I've had an FML published. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 385

You deserved it 432

Today, at 4:30 a.m., I hit a deer on the freeway on my way to work. I've only had this car for 6 months and it's totaled. I had to wait hours for a tow. On his way to pick me up, my husband's radiator blew and his serpentine belt shredded. I also missed a day of work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 073

You deserved it 104

Today, the same manager who wrote me up for missing work when my mom had had a stroke, thought it was perfectly acceptable to announce she was leaving work 6 hours early to take her dogs to the groomers. Apparently, that appointment was more urgent than me riding in an ambulance with my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 232

You deserved it 75

Today, my daughter admitted to me that the only reason she's nice to me is because I give her money. She's six. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 246

You deserved it 5 362

Today, I'm well aware that this is my own fault, but I went to a friend's house after working late. Ran towards the friend's front door and hit my head a tree limb that I didn't see. Flipped over, landed on the lawn, and blacked out for a minute. I got up, was dizzy, tripped, and fell on friend's porch. Second concussion in a year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 351

You deserved it 142

Today, my 4 year old's heavily pregnant teacher pulled me aside and asked me to talk to my son about "boundaries". Apparently, he asked her if she was going to "boobie feed" him and listed a few reasons why she should and why formula is bad, in front of the entire class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 718

You deserved it 3 338