True love waits

By Acolyte of the Bacon God - 15/02/2013 19:50 - United States - Fort Myers

Spicy
Today, my girlfriend finally said that she finally felt ready to have sex with me. It ended up being so terrible that I only managed to get some pleasure out of it when my mind drifted to the thought of going to Olive Garden later and eating some of their breadsticks. FML
I agree, your life sucks 44 176
You deserved it 10 420

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Perhaps, since she 'finally' agreed to it, she just wasn't ready? Or, perhaps your performance was also uninspiring to her.

So you fantasized about eating sticks? Are you sure you didn't enjoy it for another reason?

Comments

It may have been something else that made it unpleasureable, but I am guessing it was a hotdog down a hallway situation?

I'm going to assume she was waiting so long because it was her first time. If that's the case give her some credit, it was probably some degree of painful/awkward/uncomfortable for her, and from the sounds of it you didn't try particularly hard to make it a good experience. She'll improve with practice, like everyone does, but you can't expect her to be amazing straight away! You could also try, y'know, putting some effort in, rather than lying back and letting your mind wander to Olive Garden...

Yea, tishtashbat is right. instead of thinking of those wonderful olive garden breadsticks you could have stepped up and given her a few pointers too. The sex is only enjoyable if both parties lke it; well that is how it should be when you are in a relationship at least.

And next time spice it up with some bread sticks

You can't really expect the first time to be perfect and unrealistically movie-like. I mean, its bound to be awkward. Now, Olive Garden being more exciting is somewhat worrying...

KiddNYC1O 20

Maybe the camera man and sound guy were too close.

Omfgitsmia 15

That's the problem. You don't say you're ready. When the time is right, it'll just happen.

BellaBelle_fml 23

Exactly! For years I was so terrified of my wedding night, as I had saved myself for my husband, because I feel that virginity is a very precious gift that you can only give once so I wanted to make sure that I gave it to the most special man, my husband. And that's just a personal choice, I have no problems with other people having sex before marriage at all! If you are completely comfortable with it and you are absolutely sure that you are ready for it, then you do what is best for you and enjoy your life. But I didn't know what it would be like. I didn't know how it would feel. I was worried that I would be a disappointment. I was extremely nervous about how we would start out. Would it be super awkward? Would we fumble around like idiots? Would it be super romantic and passionate and just happen without any of the awkwardness or embarrassment? But after I had been with my husband, than boyfriend of course, I knew that he was truly the one I wanted to wake up with every morning for the rest of life. And I knew that I was genuinely ready to give myself to him completely. Thankfully, and much to my pleasant surprise, it was passionate and it did just happen. Because I had waited until I was sure that I was completely ready, it was a beautiful experience for me and him. I had heard from so many people that it really hurt for the girl's first time. But it didn't hurt me at all because my husband was so gentle with me and he took his time and didn't rush things. He wanted me to enjoy myself and feel just as good as he did. I am very fortunate to have him as my life helpmeet.

Thanks, 63, for the book. That's what everyone wants to read. A highly detailed account of a strangers first time having sex. We are not your diary

upsidedownfrownn 5

Hahahahahaha **** that was funny, especially after reading that long ass post above ...

shutupAnderson 7

I can give you directions to a real Italian restaurant.

Honestly. Olive garden is all pre made frozen crap. Might as well buy a frozen meal from the store and beat the crowd.

First time is never like the movies! It gets better with practice.

I know this sounds naive, but how can it be so bad for guys? Isn't it usually at least physically pleasurable? I never understood people being "good" or "bad" at sex. And I've had quite a bit of experience, so I'm not saying this as a totally ignorant person.

There are many things that can make it bad for guys. Technique is equally important for both sexes. Trust me, there's almost nothing worse during sex than a woman who just lies there and does nothing!