Doctor, Sleep and Love: Unfinished Somniloquy

Unfinished Somniloquy

By Anonymous - 24/10/2010 23:17 - United States

Today, I was in lying in bed with my boyfriend while he was asleep. He is going to school to be a doctor, and it appears that he says anatomical terms while asleep. My boyfriend can make me feel stupid in his sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 357

You deserved it 25 965

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Same thing different taste

By atleasthelistened - 09/03/2016 08:04 - United States - Spokane

Today, I discovered my boyfriend listens way better in his sleep than he does when he's awake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 547

You deserved it 2 451

By Anonymous - 07/08/2012 14:49 - United States

Today, I discovered that I sometimes talk in my sleep. After spending an amazing, perfectly romantic night with my boyfriend, I woke up to him telling me to leave. I have no idea what I could have said. He still won't talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 672

You deserved it 3 066

By ohfantastic - 25/01/2009 02:47 - United States

Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 696

You deserved it 2 385

By Anonymous - 06/10/2011 15:23 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend was asleep, I gave him a soft kiss and whispered how handsome and gentle he looked. His response, still asleep, was to roll over and let out a massive fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 882

You deserved it 11 308

By Anonymous - 06/01/2012 15:50 - United States

Today, while in bed with my boyfriend, I accidentally let one slip. While thinking "maybe he didn't hear, maybe he's sleeping", the shaking of the bed from his laughter let me know otherwise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 537

You deserved it 9 415

Serial killer vibes

By D Flower - 18/09/2021 13:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend making the bed, at 2 AM. And he wasn't so much making the bed as he was holding a pillow while lost in thought, looking at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 867

You deserved it 115

Fart are funny, period

By amg85904 - 30/01/2009 00:13 - United States

Today, I was in one of those lucid half sleeps with my boyfriend. Not fully awake to control myself, I ripped ass. I had no idea what to do. I pretended to still be sleeping. I'm pretty sure he noticed because he patted me on the back in a congratulatory sort of way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 905

You deserved it 6 602

By Anonymous - 31/08/2013 20:52 - Norway - Nesoddtangen

Today, I had an asthma attack while in bed with my boyfriend. He interrupted my desperate coughing only to tell me to shut up. He then rolled over to go back to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 929

You deserved it 4 019

By Anonymous - 30/11/2009 07:37 - United States

Today, I woke up to find my boyfriend watching me sleep. I asked him if he was staring at me because he was in love. He replied that it was because my farting wouldn't let him sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 785

You deserved it 13 979

By ohmygoodness - 02/03/2009 21:51 - United States

Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's place with grumbling stomach pains. I left him in bed to go have explosive diarreah in the bathroom next to his room. When I was done, I came back to bed and snuggled in next to his sleeping form and he rolled over to whisper, "I heard everthing." FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 721

You deserved it 17 288

KiwiExchange 16

Monday 25 October 2010 9:05

That's pretty badass.

taoxyeuxmay 4

Monday 25 October 2010 9:07

Your boyfriend sounds like a cutie pie!

Comments

BeautifulDizaztr 0

Tuesday 26 October 2010 10:42

then go to school f***tard! he's not the only one that can get a degree, do something for yourself. then again, college isn't meant for everyone. afterall, someones got to flip burgers...

far_east 6

Tuesday 26 October 2010 16:48

sounds like a chuck norris

fearfulsymmetry 1

Tuesday 26 October 2010 18:32

Probably one of the more stupider FML's that I've read. so if you think you're stupid, then you're stupid, stop complaining and do something about it.

fearfulsymmetry 1

Tuesday 26 October 2010 20:08

Ah, that's a typo. I meant to say more stupid. I usually pride myself on knowing good grammar, but I definitely messed up there. I have nothing against grammar freaks, but you shouldn't be so rude.

fearfulsymmetry 1

Tuesday 26 October 2010 20:27

Haha, I actually am. I must say though, my first reaction was to call you an asshole, but I made an effort to be nice. I suppose I should have said that to begin with! :)

fearfulsymmetry 1

Tuesday 26 October 2010 20:47

well, next time, I'll try to be a lot more defensive and bitchy! also, I find your picture ridiculously offensive, and I think I might just have to call you an asshole now. I'm french. ;)

fearfulsymmetry 1

Tuesday 26 October 2010 21:00

Haha. and well.....I suppose you can't help the fact that you are (most unfortunately) English. :)

FFML_314 11

Tuesday 26 October 2010 21:18

The fact that almost every comment is ending with a smiley face is annoying me. It's also telling me, that while you are trying to be nice to each other, you are gritting your teeth and forcing a smile. Pen, I am disappointed in you. These newbies have to go through initiation before you smile at them or even explain yourself. She's new, kick her down. She didn't have a typo in her first comment, she was just caught sounding stupid.