Cats and Animals: Wham! Bam! Thank You Ma'am

Wham! Bam! Thank You Ma'am

By IamAflyingCat - 22/10/2013 09:12 - United States

Today, I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see what it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room, build momentum, and launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 701

You deserved it 5 371

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Same thing different taste

Red alert

By Life With Cats - 15/08/2022 22:00

Today, I kept hearing big *THUD* sounds across the house. The first few times, I didn't think anything of it. But after several more times, I started to suspect there was an intruder. After sneaking through the house, ready to knock out whomever was there, I found out it was my cat pushing things off the table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 800

You deserved it 244

The great escape

By Anonymous - 16/02/2025 03:00 - United States

Today, I was reading on my couch when I noticed my cat trying to escape out of an open window. I leapt up to stop her, but in my panic, I tripped over a coffee table leg, slammed my face into a wall, and knocked over a guitar. My cat, meanwhile, just sauntered down, and went off to the kitchen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77

You deserved it 123

By Sarah1330 - 25/02/2015 04:33 - United States

Today, while trying to sleep, I heard what sounded like someone breaking into my house. I ran downstairs, only to find my cat had ripped down my blinds and was tangled up in them, thrashing around the floor like a fish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 410

You deserved it 3 347

Part of the furniture

By ripped - 07/09/2016 14:57 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, my cat used my head as a springboard and ripped my earring out with her claw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 835

You deserved it 1 375

By Anonymous - 18/12/2015 11:40 - United States - Santa Cruz

Today, I woke up to noises from downstairs. I practically pissed my pants and called the cops. Turned out it was just my cat being a dickhead in the living room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 737

You deserved it 5 817

Surprise!

By BadKitty - 11/09/2016 13:37 - Australia - Invermay

Today, I woke up to a loud bang. Thinking someone had broken in, I grabbed my hunting knife and ran downstairs, only to find my TV on the floor, completely destroyed, and my cat casually sitting next to it without a care in the world. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 942

You deserved it 1 279

Lightbulb moment

By Kevin - 17/10/2024 16:00 - Germany - Berlin

Today, I tried to smack a fly that was buzzing around my room. I ended up hitting the wall a little too hard, scaring my cat, who jumped up and ran under the bed, knocking over a lamp. The fly is fine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 274

You deserved it 148

Thunderbolts and lightning, very very frightening

By Bamboozled - 23/03/2023 10:00 - United States

Today, I thought I heard a nasty storm brewing, even though there was no warning that one would occur. I then realized it was one of my cats, stuck behind a chair and trying to escape with little success. Yes, her escape attempts were that noisy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 572

You deserved it 169

By Dom - 26/05/2012 21:35 - South Africa - Kwa-zulu

Today, my apartment has been echoing all day with the wails of my cat, Butters. He's yet again managed to trap himself in the umbrella stand. In the past, he has eventually gotten himself out, but this time I think I might have to use a hacksaw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 171

You deserved it 3 300

By Anonymous - 30/03/2012 07:45 - Australia - Perth

Today, I woke up to what sounded like twigs snapping. Turns out it was the skull of a live mouse being crushed in my cat's jaws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 266

You deserved it 2 746

summerguy97 16

Tuesday 22 October 2013 16:05

Even when cats are having fun they'll find a way to inadvertently ruin your life.

pandabrr 12

Tuesday 22 October 2013 16:07

Please record him.

Comments

rflurry94 6

Tuesday 22 October 2013 19:57

how does that even happen??!

josh_239 6

Tuesday 22 October 2013 20:06

that's awsome! but sucks that your stuff was ruin. i wish my cat was like that! all he does is sleep -.-

evildemonchild 18

Tuesday 22 October 2013 20:10

Lmao that sounds adorable. I have a cat but mine won't even come out of my bed :( (adopted her from pet store Wednesday)

graceinsheepwear 33

Tuesday 22 October 2013 20:24

My cat hid on the top shelf of my closet for a month when I adopted her. She came around eventually. Hang in.

hatebreeder666_fml 13

Tuesday 22 October 2013 20:11

YDI for saying asshat

Goblin182 26

Tuesday 22 October 2013 20:16

Was this cat wearing a hat?

JKROB 16

Tuesday 22 October 2013 20:26

all my cat does is eat and poo. when I try to pet her she hisses and tries to bite me. and I am terrified when I wake up with her on my stomachs glaring at me as if she would kill me if I moved.

lux0rd 18

Tuesday 22 October 2013 20:36

He just wants to be ceiling cat.

Etweens96 25

Tuesday 22 October 2013 20:42

Oh my god, your cats a genius!

DanielleinDC 33

Tuesday 22 October 2013 20:46

Your cat is way too clever. Mine tries to sneak into the hall or will climb on shelves she knows I don't want her going. When my boyfriend stays over, he says she'll climb on the headboard (I have a bookcase headboard) and stare at him.