Intimacy: Wham bam thank you ma'am

Wham bam thank you ma'am

By Noname - 11/03/2009 07:37 - United States

Today, while I was showering in my dorm, a hand reached through the curtain and grabbed my ass. I hit the person on the other side of the curtain. He opened the curtain, thinking that I was his girlfriend. He apologized, then went on to have sex with his girlfriend in the shower stall next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 935

You deserved it 3 630

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By elevenharries - 03/06/2010 08:54 - United Kingdom

Today, after staying at my boyfriend's house for the first time, I got in the shower. His bathroom door doesn't lock, so half way through my shower he walked in. Trying to be sexy, I pressed myself up against the glass, which turned out the be a door that opens outwards. I fell on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 106

You deserved it 42 370

By nude - 15/01/2010 00:43 - United States

Today, I woke up in my boyfriend's dorm and decided to take a shower before he woke up. I used the girls bathroom on the above floor, and afterwards just threw on a towel and ran to the elevator. I forgot to press my boyfriend's floor and I was taken to the lobby in a towel. People were waiting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 055

You deserved it 32 309

By Lisa - 11/12/2018 04:00 - Romania

Today, I made out with a handsome man in the restroom at a party. There was a knock on the door, interrupting us. It was his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 919

You deserved it 1 424

Heat of passion

By owl + bungee cord - 07/01/2014 20:38 - United States - Herndon

Today, my boyfriend and I were in the shower and things were getting heated. I tried to move position, but slipped and fell, bringing the shower curtain I'd grabbed onto down with me along its support rod. My ass hit the floor just as hard as the rod hit my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 538

You deserved it 10 056

Inappropriate

By Anonymous - 28/02/2019 11:00 - United States - University

Today, I went to take a shower, but forgot my towel and dorm key in my room. After my shower, I had to run down to the front desk butt-naked, using only a shampoo bottle as cover, and ask for a temporary key. The person running the front desk was my ex-girlfriend’s current boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 167

You deserved it 1 103

Oh hi!

By showerstupid - 04/04/2009 08:04 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was in the shower, and I decided to go join him. I took all my clothes off and stepped into the bathroom. I slipped on some water, and ended up hitting my head on the toilet and passing out. When I came to, I saw my boyfriend's dad looking over me in his towel. Wrong person. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81 648

You deserved it 44 832

Thanks!

By uh-oh - 21/07/2009 19:45 - United States

Today, I was taking a shower when my boyfriend suddenly hopped in with me. We were getting a little frisky when my mom's hand unexpectedly came through the curtain, dropped a condom on the bottom of the shower, all the while saying, "Keep it safe kids!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 122

You deserved it 30 922

Steamy

By Hotdamn - 21/03/2016 04:32 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot and steamy in the shower, until I slipped and fell backwards into the shower curtain, which caused me to hit the back of my head on the toilet seat, and the bar of the shower curtain to land on my throat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 288

You deserved it 3 185

Pissed

By TJ. - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - India

Today, my friend whacked me in the family jewels while I was washing my hands in our college bathroom. While I lay writhing in pain on the floor, a guy at the urinal turned around towards me to see what was wrong. He was still peeing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 671

You deserved it 3 079

By Mrs. Ned - 09/09/2015 02:00 - United States - Incline Village

Today, I walked in on my husband having sex with the shower wall. When I got in the shower with him he immediately went soft. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 938

You deserved it 3 094

Ole_Stinker 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 20:24

Too bad you didn't knock the guy out. Any guy who walks into a women's bathroom and blindly puts his hand into a stall needs to be clobbered, even if he does think his girlfriend is in there.

uscscreenwriter 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 21:09

#12, guys aren't allowed in a women's restroom ANYWHERE.

Comments

devin333 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 22:32

#19 I think you mean #13, unless you somehow know 12 goes to vassar o.o

densetsu 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 22:35

#19, you're talking about co-ed washrooms, not women's washrooms like #12 was. Get YOUR facts straight!

Lotus_Eater 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 22:42

I would have reported their asses. **** THEIR lives.

SilverBallet 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 23:05

Wow. That's classy.

wrestler_fml 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 0:27

Hahaha damn! Not only do you get no action, but after you slap his hand away from him grabbing your butt, he rubs it in and has sex next to you as well, when you probably haven't gotten any in months. I feel for you :/

Justblue 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 0:37

I would have pressed charges against him...for sure.

coool_fml 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 0:47

ahahah thats funny and # 1 he went to his gf afterrrr cause he was confusedd

greatnt249 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 1:05

I feel this needs to be said; who gives a s**t what your university policy is on who's allowed in the bathroom? That doesn't make the FML any less real; people break the rules all the time. #27, you need to lighten up; it was an honest mistake on his part.

FuzzMonkey09 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 1:14

At my college, boys are not allowed in the girls bathroom. It would have been funny if they got caught. And greatnt249, just becasue you go into your boyfriend/girlfriends college bathroom.....