Miscellaneous: What am I doing? - FML

What am I doing?

By forever young - 05/07/2013 15:16 - United States

Today, I Googled "How to act like an adult." I'm 37. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 414

You deserved it 52 827

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Same thing different taste

By badgirl - 21/06/2011 21:41 - United States

Today, I Googled myself. I found my mugshot and a blog my mom had written about how much of a problem child I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 351

You deserved it 23 627

By hiii. - 16/03/2010 02:27 - United States

Today, I was so bored I googled the word "bored." The results were boring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 338

You deserved it 40 887

By 14YearOld - 25/11/2011 17:17 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out my parents have a list of everything I have ever Googled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 903

You deserved it 8 000

Indoctrinated

By workfordayzz - 14/05/2014 17:45 - United States

Today, I realized that because of my construction job, I have spent such a huge amount of time with older, cynical guys that I keep uncontrollably using the phrase "fucking kids these days" regularly like an idiot. I'm 18. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 313

You deserved it 8 963

Need help

By Nohelpforyou - 04/03/2022 12:00 - Canada - London

Today, I was so depressed that I almost called Kids Help Phone for support. Then I remembered that I’m 33. FML

I agree, your life sucks 737

You deserved it 153

Lizard queen

By Anonymous - 05/07/2023 06:00

Today, someone tried to guess my age. They guessed 45, then 39. I'm 35 and just spent $20,000 on plastic surgery to make myself look more youthful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 172

You deserved it 1 775

Turned out OK

By Lauren - 24/11/2024 00:00 - Australia

Today, I found my high school diary and decided to read it for nostalgia. My teenage self wrote, “Future me will totally be rich, famous, and married to Chris Hemsworth by 30.” I’m 32, single, and googling “How to fix a clogged toilet.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 374

You deserved it 164

Time

By Anonymous - 08/09/2024 07:00 - United States

Today, I used to look so young for my age that in high school, I was regularly mistaken for a freshman. I never succeeded in getting dates because of it. Today, I'm 25 years-old and regularly get confused for being in my thirties. I guess all the stress from work, loneliness, and rejection really caught up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 407

You deserved it 90

We've all been there

By b…… - 28/09/2023 22:00

Today, I looked through my daughter’s search history. Did I find porn? No, worse. At the age of 17, she has been looking up the definitions of commonly used words such as ‘arbitrary,’ ‘pretentious,’ and ‘initiative.’ FML

I agree, your life sucks 151

You deserved it 1 156

By missyoudad. - 31/08/2010 07:54 - Australia

Today, I Googled my father, who I haven't seen in 3 years. The first website link was his obituary. When I confronted my mom about it, she said, "Oh, didn't I tell you?" and walked off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 536

You deserved it 2 865

Next

Top comments

Kheasus 8

Friday 5 July 2013 19:35

@35 You have the grammar of a child as well...

DocBastard 38

Friday 5 July 2013 18:56

You're only as young as you feel. You clearly feel 13. Go look in the mirror at your gray hairs and newly-forming wrinkles. That'll smack you back to reality awfully quickly.

Comments

ColdplaySucks 18

Friday 5 July 2013 19:43

Done*

MayGirl2320 8

Friday 5 July 2013 19:45

Hey. It's never too late!

ShakeDisPlace 10

Friday 5 July 2013 19:52

Forever young...I want to be...forever young

jooyuschase 5

Friday 5 July 2013 19:59

That sucks, aren't you getting close to the age when you sit on your balls?

RedPillSucks 31

Friday 5 July 2013 20:02

or Bing

SilencioIsTheKey 12

Friday 5 July 2013 20:03

If you're Johnny Depp than you can act however you want and still look like a gorgeous man with perfect suave at nearly 50.

RedPillSucks 31

Friday 5 July 2013 20:05

You're still mad about that? I said I was sorry!

jw90 18

Friday 5 July 2013 20:19

There's no shame in wanting to get in touch with the inner child. You've just got to know when you go too far.

myeviltwin 20

Friday 5 July 2013 21:50

I got in touch with my inner child and now I have a restraining order :P (for people who don't get sarcasm that's a joke)

stu0 4

Friday 5 July 2013 20:25

Grow up

beachbum_101 16

Friday 5 July 2013 20:26

hahah aww

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The Top

Today, I went to visit my fiancé's dying grandmother in the hospital with him. She started talking to us about living each day to the fullest. His grandmother points to me and says, "Life is short. That's why you don't waste any time screwing girls who look like that." FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 781

You deserved it 4 168

Today, I was driving without my seatbelt on, when I noticed a police car approaching. I panicked and desperately fumbled around for my seatbelt, only for them to pass by with just a funny look. Then it hit me that I was riding my motorcycle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 551

You deserved it 49 636

The Top

Today, I complained to my mom about her always acting cold towards me, and that it feels like she doesn’t love me anymore. Her response was, “You’re damn right I don’t, not since you broke my favorite glass last year.” She used to tell me she’d always love me no matter what. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 155

You deserved it 132

Today, I went on a blind date that my best friend had set up for me. When I arrived, I introduced myself and we sat at the table. After we ordered our food, he asked the waiter for some crayons and a kid's menu, and colored for the half hour before our food came. He didn't talk to me at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 514

You deserved it 4 028

Today, I thought of the saying “TV killed the radio star”, because in the show I'm currently watching it is so dark most of the time that you can neither see people’s faces, nor what is actually happening. If that’s modern television, we might just as well go back to radio. FML

I agree, your life sucks 531

You deserved it 180

Today, my best friend refuses to attend my wedding, all because I’m marrying her ex. He left her for me but didn’t cheat. We just fell in love and he had the decency to leave the relationship before starting to date me. She refuses to understand that no matter how hard I try to explain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 300

You deserved it 4 544

Today, it's the second day of being in Estonia with my boyfriend and his mom, visiting their family. I don't know much Estonian, but I can say short words and phrases. My boyfriend later informed me I've been mispronouncing "Thank you," and actually saying "Help me." I was wondering why people have been laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 139

You deserved it 1 022

Today, while in deep sleep, I was suddenly awoken by a tickle on my face and nearly threw my cat off the bed. Apparently, 4 a.m. Is the perfect time to touch noses with your human. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 481

You deserved it 1 581