What's the plan?
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Major red flags
He’s a fuckstick.
If you are in charge of the laundry, starch the shit out of his underwear.
A story about a ninja master, his three apprentices, and a pail of water over a door comes to mind... Congratulations for being the best ninja apprentice.
You two sound like a couple of eight-year-olds... or he sounds like a domestic abuse case waiting to happen. I can't decide which.
Keywords
Major red flags
He’s a fuckstick.