Whatever floats your boat

By anonymous - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco

Today, I went on a first date. I didn't know that licking my neck was on the agenda. FML
I agree, your life sucks 34 296
You deserved it 3 639

Top comments

cannibalism .... only leaves a funny taste when you're eating a clown

Comments

tony1891 22

wonder what's next on the agenda?

This FML needs more info, I agree it's weird but the extent depends on whether it was a blind date or OP's date was a close friend whom OP decided to date.

really? its that "gross" and "nasty" to lick someones neck? forreal? their neck is probably cleaner than their mouth and a helluva lot cleaner than genitals. people give hickies and people kiss their partners neck. i dint see why its gross

TaylorWhiteGirl 15

Because it's the FIRST date...

rocker_chick23 27

There is a difference between your partner giving you a hickey and a stranger licking your neck during the first date

orbit 22

Well I'm guessing the person didn't just jump across a table and lick op. We need more context, what was happening before the lick?

Food crumbs on her neck. Never let food go to waste!

OP here! Not much you can put into less than 300 characters. It was a blind date, and I can guarantee that there won't be a second date. He wouldn't respect my boundaries, and I'm not okay with that. Like I told him, I'm slower than a turtle in molasses.

Hey OP, I love turtles too. I'm going to use that some time okay. "I'm slower than a turtle in the molasses." As for the guy. On the positive side, you found out he's not right for you on the first date!

Totally okay with that haha. Tar is a good one too.

Eww how did it get to that part of the date?! And why did you let him if you didn't like it feel sorry for you

I'm generally a quiet person, and don't like hurting people. Also, I was trying to pay attention to the movie haha. I didn't notice he was that close until he actually did it. I didn't let him kiss me, either. He was fairly handsy.

That's a bit too early I would have to say...so a second date or not?

That's happened to me before too ...it feels weird...:/

If I'd been you, OP, the other FML that would be working its way through moderation would've said, "Today, I went on a first date. My testicles have been smashed flatter than a pancake, and I got stuck with the bill. FML." I don't blame you if you decide to stick to the single life after this.

Hiimhaileypotter 52

Because of one creep, you'd understand if they stayed single the REST of their entire life? Wow.

SuperMew 22

Reminds me of a friend I had in middle school. She got a boyfriend that wouldn't kiss her, just licked her neck and face. Sounds like he grew up and is still romancing girls.