Happy Valentine's Day

By henhouse - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Australia - Brunswick East

Spicy
Today, I lost my virginity. The most memorable aspect of it wasn't the fact that my boyfriend finished after two thrusts, but rather the fact that he first said, "The pilot has entered the cockpit." FML
I agree, your life sucks 32 576
You deserved it 3 828
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves! More…
Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Next

Top comments

MikaykayUnicorn 36

"Prepare for take off."

425 5
pizzafrommars 14

Lemme tell a similar story. Happened about an hour ago. I attempted to lose my virginity to the most beautiful girl on earth. Couldn't get it up.

175 15

Comments

pizzafrommars 14

Lemme tell a similar story. Happened about an hour ago. I attempted to lose my virginity to the most beautiful girl on earth. Couldn't get it up.

175 15
nfedrichy 20

Don't worry about first times. most people are extremely nervous.

56 3
Patriots21 14

"Common bro, couldn't get it up? Gotta hit the gym more and quit being a bitch." -- Shirtless, Flexing FML Profile-Picture Douchebags

90 4
russianmafia 2

That's normal don't worry about it. The first time is almost always over hyped up anyways.

8 1
MrConcise 34

It's totally fine, 15-year-old girls don't gossip about things like this all the way until they graduate.

16 3
xx000o 27

Was that before or after the second thrust?

1 2
crackfetus420 12

This exact same thing happened to me last december

1 1
5FDPmetalhead 17

And after two seconds of being in the air you cum to a landing

118 7
myoukei 31

Well, i doubt op came to anything...

3 1
SideOfTheAngels 23

I'm sure there's been worse first times. Still it does suck - though it can only get better from here.

20 8
swanheart 35

First times are generally supposed to be terrible - at least you got a funny story to tell out of it. It'll get better from here :)

50 4
A07 48

To infinity, and beyond!

11 11
flamingice13 11

Maybe next time he can keep in in the air longer before cumming to a landing

4 19
MandieL 27

First times always suck, especially if you are with an inexperienced partner. Sex can be overhyped and usually never lives up to your expectations the first time. But practice makes perfect, and hopefully he was respectful enough to make it up to you a different way ;)

26 6