Weird, Awkward and Miscellaneous: Today, I went to the grocery store with my mom's boyfriend. We...

By Anonymous - 15/01/2011 17:39 - United States

Today, I went to the grocery store with my mom's boyfriend. We were in the bread aisle when he picked up a loaf that was in my hand, and said, "No, no, you have to FEEL the bread," and started rubbing it all over his body. He's moving in next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 046

You deserved it 3 518

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Same thing different taste

Bad timing

By oh no - 29/01/2013 14:51 - Canada - Montreal

Today, I went to the grocery store with my boyfriend. I wasn't feeling well so I wasn't paying too much attention to his usual antics. Since he thought I was ignoring him, he decided to grab me roughly by the stomach to give me a hug. I ended up puking right in the middle of the aisle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 494

You deserved it 3 465

By Creeped Out - 29/05/2017 18:00

Today, I went to the grocery store. As I was checking out, I went to grab the same item that the cashier was reaching for. He brushed my hand. He then both watched me creepily and asked my what lotion I used to make my hands so soft. When I left, he said, "I'll dream of you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 179

You deserved it 403

By EmbarrassedChild - 30/07/2015 23:24 - United States

Today, I was at the store with my father. As we were leaving, he grabbed a baguette, put it by his crotch, and took a picture with his phone. I'm starting to feel like the parent here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 384

You deserved it 1 926

Good one

By Anonymous - 16/12/2012 00:06 - United Kingdom - London

Today, on the way out to buy groceries, my boyfriend asked if I'd like him to buy some of my favourite flowers. Happy with his rare show of affection, I said yes. When he returned, he gave me a bag of our usual brand of flour and laughed hysterically in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 303

You deserved it 4 390

The Conquest of Bread

By Anonymous - 26/04/2021 11:00 - South Africa - Cape Town

Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around, tickling each other. He grabbed my stomach roll and told me it looked like a baguette. FML

I agree, your life sucks 857

You deserved it 264

By beckbm23 - 21/11/2009 05:03 - United States

Today, at work at a grocery store an old couple came through my checkout lane. As I was putting their bagged groceries in the cart, the old man started feeling me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 168

You deserved it 2 595

By Lizofsmeg - 11/05/2012 05:03 - United States

Today, I was at my new boyfriend's flat. As I came out of the toilet he walked over, took my hand, looked at me and whispered, "You washed your hands. Good." in an extremely creepy manner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 220

You deserved it 3 226

Time to run

By Anonymous - 13/03/2012 06:21 - Canada

Today, while I was looking for an apartment for my boyfriend and myself, he asked me how would I feel about his mom moving in together with us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 391

You deserved it 2 614

Besties

By Anonymous - 21/07/2021 08:01 - South Africa - Nottingham Road

Today, my boyfriend's ex-girlfriend just moved in with his mom. They've been in my face knitting and baking bread together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 060

You deserved it 95

By motherlover - 05/08/2014 04:40 - United States - Hoffman Estates

Today, my boyfriend laid his head on my bare chest and said, "You're like my mother." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 286

You deserved it 4 370

I_iz_B_a_troll 23

Saturday 15 January 2011 23:40

Doughnt let him in your house!

LightningLadyy 0

Saturday 15 January 2011 23:46

That's not how you feel the bread.. You caress it like it is a beautiful woman.

Comments

I_iz_B_a_troll 23

Saturday 15 January 2011 23:40

Doughnt let him in your house!

babyyappld 7

Sunday 16 January 2011 0:18

maybe he was joking? and mmmmmmm doughnuts

waterpolohezy 6

Sunday 16 January 2011 0:43

I see what you did there

alwa7sh 2

Sunday 16 January 2011 1:13

Watch out for your muffin

mona_is_here 10

Sunday 16 January 2011 1:35

That's the funniest thing I've heard lately. OP, at least you know you're not ever gonna get bored when he moves in :D

DudeImBetter 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 5:22

That's a hilarious joke, you know he was joking right?

GreatGeak 8

Sunday 16 January 2011 10:07

@61 and MAYBE, you're just a sexy bech. oOooOoooOo burn. ;)

itsbecca 11

Saturday 15 January 2011 23:41

bread fetish... that's a new one.

morgan320 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 0:26

No, no it isn't.

perdix 29

Sunday 16 January 2011 3:06

Morgan's right, but they usually only last until the first yeast infection occurs.

therealsuperman 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 4:20

It's just a kinky way to show how much he loaves you

MrBoredGuy 1

Sunday 16 January 2011 22:54

he just doesn't want to move in with her but he'd feel bad if he just said it, this way she Will change her mind

meowmeowwkitty 0

Monday 14 February 2011 5:09

aw loaves you

TheRetardedApple 0

Saturday 15 January 2011 23:41

creeeeeeep!

DncrHap 9

Saturday 15 January 2011 23:43

there is nothing wrong with an occasional bread-feeling party.

Garytt 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 10:13

wqnt to come to mine? ;)2

LightningLadyy 0

Saturday 15 January 2011 23:46

That's not how you feel the bread.. You caress it like it is a beautiful woman.

macskapingvin 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 1:47

A loavely beautiful woman.

AntoshaChekhonte 6

Saturday 15 January 2011 23:47

Is his name Tim? Because if it is, I think he's my friend's creepy, Frank-N-Furteresque dad.

tenniscrazy2 6

Saturday 15 January 2011 23:49

What a weirdo. Fyl =(

Doortje 29

Saturday 15 January 2011 23:49

You better prepare yourself for nice conversations at breakfast.

DDPT2 4

Sunday 16 January 2011 5:50

Will there be toast?

macskapingvin 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 12:54

Something will pop up, for sure.

jsx12345 0

Tuesday 8 November 2011 3:56

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA no?

JordanLeah 2

Saturday 15 January 2011 23:51

It sounds like he's just being silly! He's probably just trying to make you laugh; I wouldn't take it seriously.

horselove123 0

Sunday 16 January 2011 7:20

true

Redders123 1

Sunday 16 January 2011 18:15

That's what I thought. OP just sounds humorless - or just resentful that he's moving in.

RHCP12 0

Saturday 15 January 2011 23:55

I smell a sitcom!!!

Keywords

My ex Love Shopping Family Holidays Vacation Annoying AITA Am I overreacting? Parents Harassment Miscellaneous Relatable Engagement Health Ironic Food Work Awkward Technology Money Embarrassing Singing Kids Party Sex Cute Revenge Mental health Covid

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You deserved it 6 933

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