Health, Embarrassing and Poopoo peepee: Close encounters

Close encounters

By Pinkie - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had to announce to the whole house that I was going the bathroom, because the lock on the door is broken. Before I had the chance to wipe, my dad loudly burst through the door, stark bollock naked, to take a shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 287

You deserved it 2 717

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Surprising

By Anonymous - 28/11/2019 20:00

Today, my younger sister had some friends over at ours. I was in the shower but was horrified to realize my clothes and towel were gone. Figuring that she took them, I tried to make it to my room without being seen, but one of her friends came up to use the bathroom. She saw everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 105

You deserved it 311

Thanks for the info

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff

Today, my mother told my boyfriend a cute story about me when I was little. The one where my cousin and I were caught pooping in a urinal in the church basement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 848

You deserved it 634

The smell test

By sosadstudent - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Netherlands

Today, I realized I can tell which one of my 6 roommates has taken a dump, just based on the smell emanating from the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 105

You deserved it 4 461

Well done!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was at the mall with my young daughter. I hate pooping in public but I really had to go so I brought her in with me. Thinking we were alone, I started to go and my daughter yelled, "Good job Mommy, you're using the potty like a big girl!" I then heard laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 609

You deserved it 5 044

Tough shit

By c.m.g. - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff

Today, I was taking a dump in a porta-potty at a fair. I had the runs really bad. All I have to say is that it's tough to take a shit that seems never-ending while other people outside are bitching at you and hammering on the flimsy door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 581

You deserved it 3 935

Stinky pits

By shakinmahbuttbutt - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, it's been two weeks since my parents went crazy with their attempts to save on the water bill. Every time I want to take a shower, I have to ask them first. Let's just say I've had to resort to taking sponge baths in public bathrooms to keep my B.O. under control. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 857

You deserved it 4 565

Piss poor prank

By peedonme - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - New Zealand

Today, I was in the toilet. Some idiots thought it was funny to throw a water balloon into the cubicle. The balloon didn't pop, but fell in the toilet, sending my own urine onto my shorts. I had 4 hours left of school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 269

You deserved it 2 951

How could you?

By Ashlee - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, while on a date with my boyfriend, he broke up with me. The reason why? Because I took a dump in his bathroom and "that's inappropriate for girls." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 257

You deserved it 7 917

Stranger danger

By shit - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was in a public restroom taking a dump. It's difficult for me to do it in public, so to make it easier I kept telling myself, "Nobody's here, you're all alone." I then heard, "No, you're not." I didn't realize I was saying it out loud, or that I wasn't alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 721

You deserved it 31 746

I hate myself

By trixanne - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Australia - Sydney

Today, anticipating another stressful day of work, I left my house with a cluster of thoughts in my mind. It was only when I heard my front door lock behind me, my hand still resting on the handle, that I realised I had forgotten my house keys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 718

You deserved it 3 948

gideeupp 9

Sunday 7 August 2011 1:49

Some things in life you can't un-see. This is one of them.

flockz 19

Sunday 7 August 2011 2:17

haha piece of wood? she was already being blinded by one.

Comments

mycookiezz 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 1:45

sounds sexy... lol

cyns0_oaSailor 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 1:47

Gay description of the word naked

genesisnirvana 11

Sunday 7 August 2011 2:02

Porno time :D

WCARlover 34

Sunday 7 August 2011 2:04

Wincest? Ew no nevermind I can't joke like that

RyanMacVey 17

Sunday 7 August 2011 2:06

huh?

Eaglestrike117 29

Sunday 7 August 2011 2:11

You can't get a chair to block the door when someone is in there? Or a piece of wood or something??

flockz 19

Sunday 7 August 2011 2:17

haha piece of wood? she was already being blinded by one.

Jvr91 8

Sunday 7 August 2011 2:36

What happened to knocking!

tatababe 1

Sunday 7 August 2011 2:43

Ugh that's must be disturbing

fanceh 10

Sunday 7 August 2011 2:45

you should have stared at him and finished vigorously, not even stopping to wipe.

FarSide 22

Sunday 7 August 2011 3:35

Just another day at Pinkie's house...

Pixxio_O 11

Sunday 7 August 2011 4:07

Maybe you two can hug it off? :D

YayorNay 8

Sunday 7 August 2011 7:55

Just flush, he'll be out in a instant.

PandaPi 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 13:42

Father daughter bonding time :)

ArapCheerleader 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 1:46

your dads a blonde

commietaco 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 2:41

yes.

Ghostkiller12345 9

Sunday 7 August 2011 3:20

And your stupid

tylersign 11

Sunday 7 August 2011 3:38

So? And 42, I enjoy your picture.

KiddNYC1O 20

Sunday 7 August 2011 4:17

56- Their stupid what?

ArapCheerleader 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 5:27

can't people on FML take a joke?

LordGoober 13

Sunday 7 August 2011 6:54

If it's a funny one that makes sense... Then yes :)

kei1108 13

Sunday 7 August 2011 7:00

Yes, we can. but you need to know that some types of jokes are offensive to people. but it's okay this time. I'm not really offended as long as you don't actually think that hair color is related to intelligence. But people don't exactly find dumb blonde jokes as funny anymore. Think ot it this way: Making fun of hair color is like making fun of skin color; it could be a joke, but not all jokes are funny. Thanks!

smexehXredhead0 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 8:13

You probably are, though.

gideeupp 9

Sunday 7 August 2011 1:49

Some things in life you can't un-see. This is one of them.

patebishop 7

Sunday 7 August 2011 1:59

thanks for stealing my comment

genesisnirvana 11

Sunday 7 August 2011 2:01

Another one? Walking in on your parents doing doggy style

patebishop 7

Sunday 7 August 2011 2:05

thanks for stealing my comment

patebishop 7

Sunday 7 August 2011 2:07

thanks

orangeduck 6

Sunday 7 August 2011 2:15

STF you stupid camel. She posted before you so technically you stole her comment.

patebishop 7

Sunday 7 August 2011 2:28

SHE stole it from ME. She edited her comment to be like mine because it was so brilliant.

Ghostkiller12345 9

Sunday 7 August 2011 3:21

patebishop It's weird I don't see yours anyway

Ghostkiller12345 9

Sunday 7 August 2011 3:23

patebishop It's weird I don't see yours anywhere

Brool_Story_Co 17

Sunday 7 August 2011 3:26

44- you claim someone stole your comment, as that comment was written before yours that is probably bullshit. Even if they did steal it, it's not a big deal. Stop bitching about and get on with your life.