Sprinkler

By shelly - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was locked out of my house and had to pee. I waited an hour for my boyfriend to come home. When I saw him pull into the driveway, I peed myself in excitement. FML
I agree, your life sucks 29 957
You deserved it 7 573
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Top comments

DocBastard 38

For men, the world is our porta-potty. For women, well you're pretty much screwed.

269 6
chillyCholo 5

Was he as excited as you were?

95 2

Comments

DocBastard 38

For men, the world is our porta-potty. For women, well you're pretty much screwed.

269 6
zachherbert 10

Having a boyfriend is like peeing yourself. Everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling from it...

74 4
MaCOOLiT 5

Op, Sounds like you need to be spayed.

9 16
RaggleFrock 13

Sounds like you have a nervous bladder. I hope it doesn't happen again fyl

10 1
Jaxx66 21

Well Doc... That isn't completely true. I was locked out of my house once and I found that peeing behind the shed works great. Too bad the dog didn't like that once she found out. Took her days to finally cover it up.

36 2
ohxdamnxkay02 12

And I thought dogs were the only ones to pee on themselves when they get excited (;

17 3
twifan1901 0

30 no one time me, younger sister, and my parents were in the mall my sister saw buzz lightyear then proceeded to pee on herself in excitement

6 23
KeyboardWarrior 10

You should use punctuation how do you like reading this huh its a run on sentence and it sucks to read by the way it's my younger sister my parents and I and you need at least two periods in your comment and probably a few commas tell me when I should stop because you are probably wanting to take a breath right about now but I don't have any periods so ha

17 59
desireev 17

If I have to pee that bad, I have no shame in walking behind the house and doing my business! Thank God for on-the-go Kleenex! :)

34 0
thiscrazything 1

And large bushes. Especially the kind with big, absorbent leaves.

8 0
holly1398 5

she shoulve just gone in the bushes in her backyard P:

1 1
hellbilly205 17

39 i have no problem reading a run on sentence as i write most of my sentences in run on form, who cares about puntuation its FML not highschool or a job application...

3 1
periwinkle95 10

You guys, I know this is completely off subject. But please go watch this video on YouTube named "Kony 2012". Let's make a difference and complete this mission. You'll know what I mean once you see the video. Thanks so much!

0 0
TwinArmageddons 4

What I she doesnt have a backyard or their neighbors can see into the backyard??

1 6
TwinArmageddons 4

What I she doesnt have a backyard or their neighbors can see into the backyard??

1 5
AnagenisisZagus 13

39, how the hell would I need to take a breath? I don't read FMLs aloud....?

6 1
jbloogle 10

I didn't know women used tp to wipe themselves after they peed till like a few years ago. It didn't cross my mind since I don't have to but I guess it makes sense lol.

1 1
chillyCholo 5

Was he as excited as you were?

95 2
IAdminIFlow 0

hes like.. oh hey honey what are you doing outsi.... wtf is that smell!?

7 0
labudamike 6

Someone needs diapers

3 3
TheElderTROLLZ 15

I bet he pee'd himself in excitement, too. I know I would!

10 0
myFMLname 8

read it backwards, and it still makes sense

10 0
Reddeaded 5

So close... Yet so far away.

78 2
tctheamazing 7

No, it wouldn't have been better.

4 1
fmlallthetyme 23

Forget the movie. The TV series was at least ten times better.

2 1
CommiesRus 0

When I'm Russian to pee there's no time for Stalin.

33 1
jacquay09 3

You sir, are a winner!

5 1
ohSNAPyall 26

Or be social and ask a neighbor to let you use their potty!

4 0
22cute 17

Really! Just go in the shrubbery or something! Don't be a fool.

1 0
ashla1019 5

Omg! I laughed so hard.. Lol

5 13
IAdminIFlow 0

ysb= you stupid bitch? i feel proud if i got that right

1 0
1awliet 8

Well at least you didn't do it in a public place :)

5 29
P374RD3D 9

WTF! I saw this FML had 10 YDIS, but then I refreshed the page and it only had 9.

6 37
samikitty961 8

Cool story bro.

9 3
SecretMe00 5

It's done that to me too. Idk it might be a glitch or something.

2 3
MigraineurOfLife 15

...or could it just be the fact someone changed their mind & changed their vote to fyl?

1 13
mauguster 15

WTF I saw this reply and it was buried, and when I opened it, it was a waste of my time!

12 5
AnagenisisZagus 13

^Now you know not to read buried comments? Yay?

1 3
mauguster 15

Haha yes, but sometimes they the best ones.

3 0
micahsmommy 13

Usually boyfriends hope to excite you in other ways.

60 1
japtch 15

If you were that desperate, why didn't you go to the neighbors? I'm sure they'd understand if you explained the situation.

49 2
sincere14 9

he must be one hell of a boy friend to make you piss yourself

41 2