By tsukinoie - 02/02/2014 06:33 - United States

Today, I invited my best friend to sleep on my couch while he looks for a new place. He walked inside, dropped his stuff on the floor and asked me my policy on hookers. I laughed it off as a joke. Half an hour later my doorbell rang. He took my laughter as a yes. FML
I agree, your life sucks 45 630
You deserved it 6 868
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Top comments

Nolimit2217 32

Is your friend Charlie Sheen?!

231 6
myusername83 10

Well at least you get to spend quality time with him still...with hookers

137 10

Comments

myusername83 10

Well at least you get to spend quality time with him still...with hookers

137 10
colton_colton 49

I see nothing wrong with this

9 16
CJB3228 17

If they're quality, does that mean they come with more than you paid for? I.e. STI's?

5 2
Nickb55 16

Tell him that he has to share and you win too!

76 6
LuluRichards 20

Oh goodness. I hope you let him know you don't find that acceptable, he needs to respect you and your home - it's only basic manners.

105 12
strike2867 13

What if he brought enough for the whole class?

63 4
SWC_Penguin 17

Hookers made the "basic" list? I guess it comes up more often than I thought.

31 1
CallMeMcFeelii 13

Nothing wrong with bought, consensual sex. We all do it to some degree.

13 28
buttcramp 21

yeah, agreed. OP, if this is actually upsetting you, I'd lay down some ground rules because you're doing this friend a favor and the friend should respect you/your home.

22 1
Lacist 19

Take out the bought part that comes with STDs.

11 3
jlamb0328 4

You know they normally have a group rate...

50 3
Kamon97 23

Good thing he isn't moving in with you.

35 1
JMichael 25

Well you really didn't say yes or no.

61 8
Kamon97 23

Would you want someone to invite hookers to your house? I didn't think so...

21 11
JMichael 25

Depends, do they all have doctors notes saying they're STD free and as tight as a bolt to a nut? Cuz you know..you don't want anything lose.

9 23
SuckMeBeautifu1 24

@62 Maybe you're just small

5 11
buttcramp 21

Scientifically, it's proven that a woman's ****** doesn't become larger or loose as a result of having tons of sex. During sex, yes, but if you were to pull out and count to five and reinsert your penis, it would then be just at tight as when you first inserted. The more you know!

18 1
SuckMeBeautifu1 24

@89 Pregnancy, however...

5 2
angelicdevil 16

So true, too many people aren't aware of this.

1 1
buttcramp 21

lol #94 this does take some time.. different for each woman depending on how they delivered their baby but most doctors say at least four weeks. you don't just bring a baby home and everything is magic downstairs.. you have stitches, gush blood with every movement you make, ointment, pain reliever spray, can't walk normally, can't wipe when you potty (dab dry), can't get comfy to sleep well, can't have sex (you can still get pregnant/pain unbearable). I remember my husband laughing at me "both of y'all are in diapers!" LOL

2 1