By ricard0 - 27/02/2014 20:58 - United States - Petaluma

Today, I fell asleep on the couch, only to wake up later with my dog's tongue over my mouth. That was my first ever kiss. FML
I agree, your life sucks 42 066
You deserved it 6 144
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Top comments

SonOfAMitch 14

What did it taste like? Hopefully something okay, as you don't want you to remember your first kiss as 'dog butt and dirt'.

61 6

Comments

SemiAuto 21

Never thought I'd hear that being a reason to why a kiss doesn't count

23 3
vipirius 18

20. Damn it, so you're saying I'm still a virgin?

47 3
FucYoCouch 13

Pretttty sure you're implying ***********..

5 14
falon142012 22

It's actually spelled **********. Like BEST. I find that weird.

19 1
SonOfAMitch 14

What did it taste like? Hopefully something okay, as you don't want you to remember your first kiss as 'dog butt and dirt'.

61 6
HarrisonVR 17

at least you can be sure you didn't give the dog any STDs

4 29
wcc7777777 5

I don't think that was a worry, seeing how kissing can't transfer STDs.

2 24
CatchMe25 16

Herpes, warts, gonorrhea, syphilis, thrush (or candida)....yea there's actually a lot that you can catch via mouth. Forewarned is forearmed!!

3 1
noatak 6

Well now you can only have better kisses from here on out. Stay positive OP.

25 3
fluffywaspluka 7

A whole new meaning to “doggy style!”

6 26
angelgirl52796 8

#29, your profile picture goes perfectly with your comment.

2 0
MisterDoge 14

That's happened to me countless times when I fall asleep. I honestly dont even care anymore.

21 2
Nyarlothatep 12

I condemn you to the deepest of the internet's Hell.

0 3
Voij 16

I might be alone with this thought, but I wouldn't put that much importance on a first kiss. Chances are that the experience will, similarly to one's "first time", be fairly disappointing in hindsight. That's just how it is for pretty much everyone. My advice would be to treat kisses in two ways: "Normal" kisses that should not be considered all that importantly. Treat these like common interactions between people who are willing to allow each other to enter the respective comfort zones. "Intimate" kisses are something that you should treat preciously and put importance onto, these are special and you should consider them as such. PS: I should probably note that I'm not suggesting that you go around kissing everyone you meet. Always do this stuff within reason and, if you're in a relationship, only as much as you know that your partner is comfortable with.[E.g. some people are alright with their partners giving kisses as greetings, some are not. Find out beforehand before you attempt this stuff.]

15 7
how_to_implode 17

Getting licked on the mouth =/= getting kissed. Dogs will lick you all over the face if you let them. Honestly, I'm sure it's not the first time your dog's gotten you on the mouth. (This wasn't supposed to be a reply to the above comment, just somehow got put here.)

14 1