School, Teachers and Health: A little less conversation…

A little less conversation…

By IPityTheStool - 09/06/2011 13:22 - United Kingdom

Today, I used the staff toilets at school. As I sat down, I heard a sudden plop, followed by the stench of diarrhoea from the next cubicle. It was followed by, "I do apologise!" It was my English teacher. Then we continued to chat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 504

You deserved it 7 623

Women's Day: Equality and Laughter
Stories that celebrate women in a light-hearted and humorous way, because equality can also be a source of joy! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By poop - 21/03/2015 16:47 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was at my Mandarin teacher's house. I had diarrhoea and had to go to the toilet. My mum texted me while I was still in the toilet saying, "We all heard you". FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 619

You deserved it 2 727

Big Muff Fuzz

By Fartagirl - 15/10/2021 05:00

Today, I was using the restroom at school. What I thought was going to be just peeing turned into a humongous fart that echoed in the toilet bowl. Already embarrassed, I opened the door to leave. Two girls, who obviously heard, were giggling and saying, “It’s always the fat bitches.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 272

You deserved it 204

Shy pooper

By privatebathroomneeded - 16/12/2014 19:26 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I needed to take a dump at school. As soon as I sat down, somebody else walked in. I'm extremely poop-shy, so I was forced to wait for several minutes while they styled their hair and applied makeup. After they left, I breathed a sigh of relief. Then someone else walked in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 940

You deserved it 8 093

By Anonymous - 10/05/2011 21:20 - United States

Today, our school got portable classrooms for the construction on our school. I had to take a dump really bad, and had to use the built in bathroom. As I was in there I heard laughing. Turns out, every sound you make is an entire broadcast to the class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 754

You deserved it 4 439

Check her out

By minnie - 28/08/2009 18:30 - United States

Today, I was feeling sick and I farted really loud in the school's girls bathroom. Some boys overheard from the hall and called everyone over. I came out only to find about 20 guys staring anxiously at the bathroom's door to see who I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 814

You deserved it 6 908

By Anonymous - 10/04/2009 16:53 - United States

Today, I was sitting in my chemistry class when a sick girl behind me asked "Can I go to the bathroom?" My teacher, being smart said, "Don't you mean MAY I use the bathroom?" Meanwhile, the girl behind me started throwing up all over her desk and me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 330

You deserved it 3 569

Take a break

By Anonymous - 04/05/2024 07:00 - United States

Today, I really had to take a shit. My coworker had gone on lunch break and I was alone in the shop. There were no customers, so to the can I went. Cue a long series of loud wet farts and splashes, followed by the flush. I emerged to see the horrified face of some old lady and her grandson who'd heard everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 458

You deserved it 115

Not now, Kelsey

By Amy - 01/04/2011 01:46 - United States

Today, after a huge row with my best friend at school, I hid myself away in the bathroom and quietly sobbed to myself. A kid loudly busted into the stall next to me and took a minute-long shit that sounded like a hailstorm of bullets. The putrid stench made me retch and violently throw up everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 720

You deserved it 7 261

Noise machine

By achtung - 01/02/2009 23:57 - United States

Today, I had to use my friend's toilet. His pretty cute sister was in the kitchen adjoining the bathroom, so I smiled and said hi on my way through. I then had the loudest and most vile-sounding shit of my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 143

You deserved it 5 840

Bathroom break

By Anonymous - 21/12/2010 02:31 - United States

Today, I had to go to the bathroom. I was in a rush, so I went into the boys bathroom. I then had diarrhea. The entire basketball team was waiting for me outside the stall. They did a slow clap for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 382

You deserved it 8 268

chester75 5

Thursday 9 June 2011 18:46

lol I can't believe OP didn't find it awkward

puppy23 3

Thursday 9 June 2011 18:50

Real English uses s, American English uses z. We say apologise, you say apologize. Get an education.

Comments

TheyCallmeStacey 9

Thursday 9 June 2011 22:13

nothing like some good bathroom time conversation

melchibr_fml 0

Friday 10 June 2011 18:11

you are very pretty!

pokopiko 9

Thursday 9 June 2011 22:36

1. your username is amazing. 2. when you said the teacher said, "I do apologize!" it reminded me if wallless and gromet, with the outrageous British accents. :3

NeekaTodd 3

Friday 10 June 2011 3:00

Wallless? Wallace. :p

pokemongray 2

Thursday 9 June 2011 22:48

awks.

wriptidez 0

Thursday 9 June 2011 22:51

rofl ewwwww

daniel7669 0

Thursday 9 June 2011 23:22

you should've ****** your teacher right then and there

BellaMarta 19

Thursday 9 June 2011 23:28

ydi for not using the regular bathroom

epmorr2010 9

Friday 10 June 2011 0:45

wow spell much?

mahomie97 7

Friday 10 June 2011 0:52

ewwwwwwyy!!(: ahahah

sietseld 13

Friday 10 June 2011 1:20

I work in the pharamaceutical industry (in the US) and we spell it diarrhoea, different from how I am used to seeing it spelled growing up. It is the technical medical spelling. I, like most people, would have to look it up if I wanted to know how to spell it (either way)!