dont worry about it or take it to personally she just wishes her parents were back together or she doesn't like someone new as her motherly figure

5,000 on a dress? **** you

I don't think that seems like a FML that seems "haha karmas a bitch"

Playing the devil's advocate here, if the kids are still young enough to live at home, the parents should consult their children before they remarry to see if they are okay with it. Like it or not, the parent made an obligation. The parents chose to have children, the children neither chose to be born nor what kind of parents they have. They were born, had very little influence on the strength of their biological parents relationship with each other, and there is a good point that at this point in their life that the decision of moving out and living in their parents home is a choice between perpetual poverty and opportunity. We don't know how long it has been since the daughter's biological parents split up, if she has moved on from it, nor if or how well she knew of the nature of the OP and fiance's relationship before the wedding was announced. A new relationship brings a lot of changes that the child is powerless to stop, and marriage, even if someone personally doesn't believe in it or does not feel the need for it, carries a lot of cultural baggage. On the same token, the relationship between OP and the father is of choice. If either were uncomfortable with each other or how fast it was progressing, they were in a position to slow or stop it. The child on the other hand, at best could voice her own uncertainty. We don't know how or if the father addressed her uncertainty. While he could have talked to her and been convinced that she was ok (she lied about it to avoid hurting his feelings and he wanting to believe her), he could also have ignored them completely or punished and humiliated her about it, telling her that she was being a spoiled brat or unable to be happy for him for either not liking OP or not being ready to accept their relationship.

Tbh, I was I think 12 when my mom married my step father. I hated it so much, I did not want them to get married and to have him as my step dad. Seven years later which is now I'm so happy that they did. Me and him get along just grand and I even call him my father now since my bio dad left me at 10. Just give it time it's really hard to adjust to a new "parental figure" or even having your parents re marry. I'm sure later on she will love you and appreciate you a lot more. Just give it time and always be a good parent (not by giving her things to like you or like that more of like be there when she needs you, give her advice, stuff like that, like a mother would do) she is technically your daughter once you marry her father. Just give it time! And talk to her about it and what you heard maybe she may tell you why she thinks that way and you can reassure her

The only advice I can give you is be ready for the first time she yells, "YOU'RE NOT MY REAL MOM!"

Having an "I'm here for good and there's nothing you can do about it, deal with it!" attitude is the starting line for the fast track to an awful relationship. Yes, it's her fathers choice, but it's a big deal for her to. Some tips I have from my friend who had an awful blowout with her stepmom that they worked through: 1. You're not mom. Mom is mom. Don't try to take her to mother daughter labeled activities or pretend she's your kid. My friends step mom really pushed the "new mom" thing, so anything labeled mother is a sensitive topic for now. 2. Decide what you want to be called and get that awkwardness out of the way. I suggest starting with your first name, as it's not a label and will feel the least weird. 3. Don't bribe her to like you with gifts, etc. 4. Try some simple bonding, but don't force it (ex: I'm going to the mall to run errands if you want to come) 5. If she's not feeling it, give her time and space. It's probably a weird and uncomfortable thing to go through, and teens tend to use anger to express it/speak to their friends about it. Saying "ugh my step mom is a bitch, I don't want my dad to marry her" is teenager for "I'm really uncomfortable with the fact my dad is remarrying, it's too soon after the divorce, I'm not ready, scared divorce happens again, aka a more emotional response. Good luck, there's a lot of useful comments here, but I think the best advice is to be patient with her and try to sync to her routines, not vice versa

She probably isn't ready to have you as a step mom. don't be a bitch to the poor girl.

It's always hard stepping into a family that's already grown. being a step... I guess ull have ur moments. takes time...

Don't try to force these things. If she doesn't want you to be a part of her life, keep a reasonable distance. I've seen what happens when someone's parent enters into a new relationship that the daughter isn't ok with.