Love, Weird and Animals: Alexa, play "You'll Always Find Me In The Kitchen At Parties" by Jona Lewie

Alexa, play "You'll Always Find Me In The Kitchen At Parties" by Jona Lewie

By Anonymous - 09/10/2009 18:48 - United Kingdom

Today, the guy I'd been talking to online and liked came to my house party with a bunch of mutual friends. He spent the night sitting in the corner on the sofa talking to my cat. I woke up later to see that not only had he crashed for the night, but he'd curled up in the dog basket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 686

You deserved it 9 290

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Same thing different taste

By LC - 23/01/2009 15:12 - United States

Today, I invited this guy I fooled around with over to "hang out". He's "en route", so I start to make my bed only to find my cat thought this was the best time to tell me she's sick by throwing up in my bed. I only have one set of linen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 837

You deserved it 7 161

By HM - 16/04/2015 13:10 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, I invited a guy I've been crushing on for ages to my house, and I really wanted to make a good impression. We were sitting in the living room having drinks when my cat came in, dragging a pair of my dirty underwear and dropped them right in front of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 594

You deserved it 4 524

By catastrophy - 19/11/2016 09:20

Today, a guy I've been seeing called me really drunk again to talk about his and his cat's angst. He put me on speaker so I could have a meowing-conversation with his cat to soothe her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 849

You deserved it 1 334

By drunk - 06/03/2010 07:38 - Australia

Today, I woke up on a friend's floor with a massive hangover after her party last night. My friend, who was next to me, barfed all over me. She then told me that while I was drunk last night, I made out with her dog as well as two of our other friend's boyfriends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 282

You deserved it 40 966

By lessinterestingthanadog - 08/11/2009 05:28 - United States

Today, I invited the guy I've been seeing to my home for the first time. He spent over an hour talking to my twelve-year-old dog. Occasionally he would look up to ask me a question, but when I answered he would just continue talking to the dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 302

You deserved it 3 814

You OK, hun?

By Anonymous - 25/11/2016 08:43

Today, I got to meet the guy that I have been talking to over a dating website. We were having a great time, at least until I managed to randomly fall asleep in front of him. I spent the rest of the day sending text messages trying to explain to him that I suffer from narcolepsy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 267

You deserved it 1 050

By caseyj - 25/03/2011 05:50 - United States

Today, I went to a birthday party. A half hour in, a girl started showing me pictures of her cat. That was the high point of the night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 149

You deserved it 4 764

By crazy cat lady - 03/11/2016 19:31 - Canada - Fredericton

Today, I got a cat so I'd have some company, since my roommate is always with her boyfriend. Too bad the cat likes her more. So now I get to sit and listen to her talk to her boyfriend to get to cuddle with my kitty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 527

You deserved it 876

No one disturbs the masters

By Anonymous - 01/08/2015 04:10 - United States - Erie

Today, I went to the restaurant where my date and I were supposed to meet. After half an hour he still hadn't arrived, so I texted him. He replied with a half-hearted apology and said he couldn't come because his cat had fallen asleep on his lap and he didn't want to wake it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 359

You deserved it 3 234

By no more mr nice guy - 27/12/2016 07:32

Today, my friend invited me, his girlfriend, and the girl I like over to his house to hang out. We hoped it would get me closer to my crush. The day ended with them having a threesome and me locked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 117

You deserved it 974

Failzoid 0

Friday 9 October 2009 23:06

Dude. You should have joined them in the basket. Enough room for twooo ;3

Focnr 0

Sunday 20 February 2011 13:43

SPARTA

Comments

TheTragicReturn 0

Saturday 10 October 2009 2:22

1. The guy didn't know anybody at your house. I would have been nervous (too). 2. You met him online. I hope you weren't expecting much.

mommmma 0

Saturday 10 October 2009 3:16

MUTUAL means "in-common|... . so, clearly he knew some of the friends.

DameGreyWulf 0

Saturday 10 October 2009 3:27

Well, there's a difference between knowing online and knowing offline. He could have easily been overwhelmed. Some people have a problem with it, while others are fine. When I visited my good online friend, I swear I shrank two inches, and that was just HER. It wore off quickly though, since we did know each other well, but we don't know how well the guy knew all these people, and that's several people compared to one person. We also don't know if this is his first time doing something like this, but I would hope not since there were so many people involved. Fool could have had something worse happen.

DangerousBabee 0

Saturday 10 October 2009 2:25

YDI for meeting people online. Low-life lewzer. :P

feed_the_ducks 0

Saturday 10 October 2009 2:28

Dangerous, you do realize how popular the internet is when it comes to people interacting right? I mean people meet all the time through match.com or eharmony so are those people "lewzers" as well?