Intimacy: Automaton - FML

Automaton

By Jessie - 25/12/2010 13:38 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were in our room getting hot and heavy. As he was entering me, he started making electronic whirring sounds. Once inside, he said in a robotic voice, "Initiating launch sequence in 3... 2... 1..." and began thrusting as fast as possible. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 714

You deserved it 9 558

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Same thing different taste

Repetition

By Fuck - 25/02/2015 21:39 - United States - Fowler

Spicy

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. In the middle of it, he started saying in deep voice, "Enter, exit." Over and over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 769

You deserved it 4 441

By Anonymous - 22/02/2012 05:42 - United States

Spicy

Today, my husband and I were about to have sex. As soon as I got on top, he started speaking in a robot voice, then demanded that I call him "The Fuckinator." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 778

You deserved it 5 614

By Anonymous - 19/01/2016 11:03 - United Kingdom - London

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 306

You deserved it 2 763

By S…… - 09/01/2011 10:18 - Singapore

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 389

You deserved it 5 766

By kblevss - 05/01/2013 09:21 - United States - Bayville

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my new boyfriend, and I realized that he enjoys making airplane sound effects while inserting himself inside of me. Moment ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 790

You deserved it 5 730

By Anonymous - 18/08/2009 23:45 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. After about 10 minutes, while we changed positions, he shouts, "Power Rangers - It's Morphin' Time!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 932

You deserved it 12 632

Turn off

By no no no - 21/03/2023 02:00

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend decided to "spice up sex" by talking like an anime character. We had to stop after the line, "Your vagina will crumble before the power of my Hypercock!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 108

You deserved it 311

By 504-A1 - 11/05/2012 22:02 - Canada - Barrie

Spicy

Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 508

You deserved it 10 414

By Heyy - 24/11/2010 17:55 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when he started shaking really hard. When I asked him what he was doing, he simply said, "I want to be better than your vibrator!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 116

You deserved it 12 074

By jokersgirl - 21/05/2019 04:00

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I had the wildest sex we'd ever had. I was on top of him and started going at it like crazy. I was close to finishing when the Mortal Kombat phrase "FINISH HIM!" popped into my head. It wasn't until I saw a weird look on his face that I realized I'd said it out loud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 278

You deserved it 876

Next

Top comments

Psychotic_Snail 0

Saturday 25 December 2010 19:38

hahaha hes a keeper

dragsdotasniper 2

Saturday 25 December 2010 19:37

funny bf

Comments

jadejazmyn 5

Monday 13 June 2011 6:46

New boy friend time. Lol

bnvc 0

Monday 13 June 2011 17:30

LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!

valerie7188 10

Saturday 18 June 2011 7:20

that's awesome!!!!

jtmarrero17 0

Sunday 19 June 2011 0:13

that dude is a champ

LaylaaMariee 0

Thursday 14 July 2011 1:54

How is that a bad thing??

fakemommy 2

Friday 15 July 2011 23:05

i wish my boyfriend was that cool. :D

chongcecilia 0

Thursday 21 July 2011 20:00

lmfao sometimes I wish my boyfriend did something funny it would make sex funny lol

nerdling 1

Monday 1 August 2011 7:48

thats kind of amazing

ThisRandomChild 0

Thursday 4 August 2011 20:07

Lmfao!!!

Hoarebag 0

Tuesday 27 September 2011 9:26

The shermanator strikes again? Lol

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Keywords

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The Top

If you want to be the next published artist, send an email to alice [at] fmylife.com including a link to your website/blog/DA. But DON'T send your illustration right away! You need first to get in touch with me, and I'll tell you what you have to do!...

I agree, your life sucks 9

You deserved it 22

Today, we are having work done and our chimney breast has a hole where a brick is missing. Well, my husband thought it would be funny to rig up some realistic spider leg things that would poke out of the hole next to my face. I had to wash the sofa cushion because I pissed myself from fright. FML

I agree, your life sucks 351

You deserved it 94

The Top

Today, while working at my local supermarket, a customer threw a turkey at me because we "should have bigger ones." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 599

You deserved it 2 826

Today, it was my wedding, and I live in a country that doesn't take premarital sex lightly. My wife chose the last girl I slept with to be her main bridesmaid. She doesn't know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 461

You deserved it 2 142

Today, I walked out of the operating room at the end of an emergency case. I spent ten minutes talking to a woman about her son before we realized I was talking to the wrong family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 252

You deserved it 28 740

Today, my 3-year-old daughter has been crying non-stop for an hour because she wants to take off her black shoes. She's not wearing any. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 800

You deserved it 236

Today, my mother bought me some "biodegradable" tissues. Indeed, they melted… in my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 843

You deserved it 2 369

Today, I found out my old DVD player is jealous of my Blu-ray player. It fell from the top of my closet and hit me in the head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 247

You deserved it 7 599