Intimacy: Automaton

Automaton

By Jessie - 25/12/2010 13:38 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were in our room getting hot and heavy. As he was entering me, he started making electronic whirring sounds. Once inside, he said in a robotic voice, "Initiating launch sequence in 3... 2... 1..." and began thrusting as fast as possible. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 714

You deserved it 9 558

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Same thing different taste

Repetition

By Fuck - 25/02/2015 21:39 - United States - Fowler

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. In the middle of it, he started saying in deep voice, "Enter, exit." Over and over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 769

You deserved it 4 441

By Anonymous - 22/02/2012 05:42 - United States

Today, my husband and I were about to have sex. As soon as I got on top, he started speaking in a robot voice, then demanded that I call him "The Fuckinator." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 778

You deserved it 5 614

By Anonymous - 19/01/2016 11:03 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 306

You deserved it 2 763

By S…… - 09/01/2011 10:18 - Singapore

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 389

You deserved it 5 766

By kblevss - 05/01/2013 09:21 - United States - Bayville

Today, I was having sex with my new boyfriend, and I realized that he enjoys making airplane sound effects while inserting himself inside of me. Moment ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 790

You deserved it 5 730

By Anonymous - 18/08/2009 23:45 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. After about 10 minutes, while we changed positions, he shouts, "Power Rangers - It's Morphin' Time!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 932

You deserved it 12 632

Turn off

By no no no - 21/03/2023 02:00

Today, my boyfriend decided to "spice up sex" by talking like an anime character. We had to stop after the line, "Your vagina will crumble before the power of my Hypercock!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 108

You deserved it 311

By 504-A1 - 11/05/2012 22:02 - Canada - Barrie

Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 508

You deserved it 10 414

By Heyy - 24/11/2010 17:55 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when he started shaking really hard. When I asked him what he was doing, he simply said, "I want to be better than your vibrator!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 116

You deserved it 12 074

By jokersgirl - 21/05/2019 04:00

Today, my boyfriend and I had the wildest sex we'd ever had. I was on top of him and started going at it like crazy. I was close to finishing when the Mortal Kombat phrase "FINISH HIM!" popped into my head. It wasn't until I saw a weird look on his face that I realized I'd said it out loud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 278

You deserved it 876

Psychotic_Snail 0

Saturday 25 December 2010 19:38

hahaha hes a keeper

dragsdotasniper 2

Saturday 25 December 2010 19:37

funny bf

Comments

soccerjb7 1

Tuesday 28 December 2010 6:00

well thats attractive...

Maxibrax459 0

Tuesday 28 December 2010 6:01

Get some.

sbeavs94 0

Tuesday 28 December 2010 9:34

oh my gosh so funny!!!! haha he sounds like an entertaining person

akaashR 0

Tuesday 28 December 2010 13:06

did he say re entering earths atmosphere before he blew?

GaGaBoyPaul 0

Wednesday 29 December 2010 23:22

wow what is with all these weird guys and their sex noises/comments posts on here lol

Carebearz 0

Thursday 30 December 2010 2:40

That sounds like something my boyfriend would do.

dansco 24

Thursday 30 December 2010 9:41

And we have lift off lol

wade042 0

Thursday 30 December 2010 13:04

lmao i just busted up laughing

vashthestampede 0

Thursday 30 December 2010 15:02

hehehe...oh your serious, let me laugh even harder HAHAHAHAHAHA

evebright 5

Thursday 30 December 2010 16:46

rofl! that's great, I hope you laughed cuz your laughter would cause your capsule chamber to pulsate creating excellent sensations that would contribute to the pleasure of the launch! I LOVE it!!