Awkward, Smells and Intimacy: Awkward

Awkward

By Nikki - 18/03/2009 03:15 - United States

Today, I woke up, completely naked, in bed with a guy I met the night before. We were both drunk the night before and I had agreed to go home with him. The reason I woke up was that someone was knocking on his bedroom door. Turns out he lives with his mom and she made us pancakes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 185

You deserved it 91 571

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Same thing different taste

By paulinapo - 30/05/2013 01:53 - United States - Staten Island

Today, I woke up in bed with a one-night stand. We got really drunk the night before so I went to make a hangover-cure breakfast. Apparently he was so drunk that he didn't remember me, and when he came to the kitchen, he knocked me out with a pan and called the cops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 338

You deserved it 9 837

By holyshitbatman - 22/09/2012 14:06 - United States - Chicago

Today, I woke up naked next to my gay roommate after a night of drinking. Neither he nor I remember anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 532

You deserved it 29 765

By homewrecker - 01/08/2009 13:44 - United States

Today, I woke up from a night of crazy drunken sex with a guy I had met at a friends 23rd birthday party. The lights had been off when we had stumbled in to his house the night before. When I opened my eyes today, the first thing I saw was his family picture, complete with his wife and son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 076

You deserved it 64 024

By adam - 03/02/2010 20:10 - France

Today, my mom woke me up and asked if I wanted breakfast. I had passed out naked on the kitchen floor after a party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 085

You deserved it 40 679

Twisted

By sleepwalker - 22/11/2009 01:33 - United States

Today, I woke up in my roommate's bed. Apparently, the previous night I sleep-walked into her room, layed on her bed, and fell asleep. In the middle of her and her boyfriend having sex. He's now going around saying he slept with both of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 774

You deserved it 4 725

By Sleep Walking - 23/01/2009 18:51 - United States

Today, I found out that after drunkenly falling asleep at a guy's house, I not only slept-walked in his house, but I went upstairs into his parents room. And used their bathroom. I don't remember any of this, but his mom does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 896

You deserved it 9 224

By Matt - 13/07/2012 19:06 - United States

Today, I woke up in a daze after a long night drinking. I felt a subtle nudge on my shoulder. I was at my ex-girlfriend's house, passed out on top of her, with no pants on. Her dad was, in so many words, informing me that I had to leave immediately. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 346

You deserved it 57 819

Date grape

By Anonymous - 05/09/2019 08:02 - United States - Staten Island

Today, my boyfriend and I were drinking wine naked after sex. He went to get another glass, but on the way back tripped and fell flat on his face. His roommate unexpectedly came home, saw him face-down on the floor, thought I'd drugged him and tackled me before I could explain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 117

You deserved it 245

It's sus

By Anonymous - 04/01/2011 09:01 - New Zealand

Today, I went down on my boyfriend while he was drunk, and he told me to get protection from his bedroom. I came back, he was passed out on the couch. His parents then came into the room after hearing noises. I was sitting there naked holding a condom while he was fast asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 141

You deserved it 10 355

Waste moment

By Anonymous - 10/02/2020 20:00

Today, I went out drinking with my friends and my boyfriend met me there. We decided then to come home and planned an intimate moment. I got on top of him and went to kiss his neck. Next thing I know, I fell asleep right before we started. FML

I agree, your life sucks 999

You deserved it 1 349

prvag23 0

Wednesday 18 March 2009 9:21

That's almost sweet that his mom made breakfast...in a really, really weird and completely awkward way.

drunkgirlscout2 0

Wednesday 18 March 2009 9:25

Hey, you did get FREE PANCAKES. Unless the pancakes were green and filled with laxatives, I would be happy

Comments

dg72592_fml 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 0:24

how is that an FML? he's just some guy, who cares if he lives with his mom? and you got pancakes :)

OhSoFoxy 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 0:30

Did his mom know you were there before knocking on the door? If so, this is not a FML.

TurtleLG 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 0:46

soo...what's wrong|?

sweens_fml 1

Thursday 19 March 2009 0:54

sex and pancakes. whats f'd with your life?

lolol182 4

Thursday 19 March 2009 0:57

sex and pancakes? nothing wrong here

stolen_sammich 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 1:02

its hilarious how much everyone's love for pancakes is totally outstripping the stigma of a single guy living with his mother. xD which is the way the world should be. pancakes = social panacea

fuck_my_knife 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 1:46

how is this FML? you got sex AND pancakes! it's a win-win situation!

bestatruining 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 1:49

be glad you got pancakes...i slept with one of my friends randomly one drunk night (losing my virginity) about 6 years ago...his dad came in and said "get her out of your room before your mom sees her" i then went back to sleep and when i came downstairs about an hour later i overheard his mom saying "i'm so glad to see you let that **** spend the night get her the **** out of here" i then turned the corner and i said "i'm sorry i'm leaving" she responded with "i'm sorry you heard that...he does this a lot"