Dogs and Love: Blame the pooch

Blame the pooch

By anamota89 - 11/05/2012 09:33 - United States

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. I had to fart really badly, so thinking that he wouldn't hear me, I did so. He heard me and asked, "Did you fart?" I said "No, it was my dog." I don't have a dog, and he knows this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 339

You deserved it 32 302

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Same thing different taste

By silentbutdeadly - 27/04/2009 22:04 - United States

Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend. His dog, Baxter, has a bad farting problem. I decided it would be okay to let a silent fart out and blame the dog. Baxter was outside when I blamed him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 996

You deserved it 77 618

By Anonymous - 11/09/2012 19:16 - Sweden - Guayanilla

Today, I had a serious talk with my boyfriend about our relationship troubles. He stopped me in the middle of a sentence with a huge fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 327

You deserved it 4 383

By Oops - 23/05/2010 09:21 - Australia

Today, while out with my boyfriend I accidentally let out a rather large fart. I was in such shock the only sentence I could make was "I farted." Clearly he was in shock too because the only words he could utter were "I know." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 217

You deserved it 29 952

By TrulyYours - 07/05/2009 12:39 - United States

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend on the phone. After a short pause I hear him say "I love you." Smiling I say, "I love you too." Then he says, "I was talking to my dog." FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 559

You deserved it 5 915

By ShitHappens - 24/10/2011 05:04 - United States

Today, while on the phone with my boyfriend, I really needed to poop. Badly. He was in the middle of telling a story, so I figured I could get away with muting the phone while on the toilet. Halfway through, he suddenly went silent. I forgot to mute the phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 566

You deserved it 44 721

Tension

By Anonymous - 06/04/2011 11:47 - Netherlands

Today, my boyfriend's parents visited us. When everyone was chatting in the room, I needed to go to the bathroom. I got up and wanted to walk away when I sneezed, and farted at the same time. I thought they didn't hear it, until my boyfriend's brother said, "That wasn't just a sneeze was it?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 989

You deserved it 5 475

By StinkyandStupid - 15/03/2012 17:49 - United States

Today, I was calling my husband while driving. While the phone rang, I farted. As soon as the horrid smell hit my nose, my husband answered. I panicked and hung up quickly, thinking to myself how embarrassed I was because he could smell it. I'm an idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 653

You deserved it 38 129

By fartlover - 27/11/2009 05:10 - Canada

Today, I went over to my boyfriend's apartment and I smelled a delicious aroma as I walked in so I asked him what he was cooking. His response was, "I'm not cooking anything. I just farted." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 305

You deserved it 8 647

By BadBreath - 09/04/2009 03:43 - United States

Today, I was having a horrible day. I was laying on the couch, crying, when my dog came up on the couch to console me. I was thinking about how great it was to have a dog, because they're there for you when no one else is. As I was sobbing, I heard something. My dog farted into my mouth. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 682

You deserved it 9 394

By byebyeromance - 26/08/2014 01:03 - United States - State College

Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 315

You deserved it 5 073

notsorandomguy 18

Friday 11 May 2012 16:15

What's wrong with a plain old "What? What are you talking about"? Is it too mainstream?

ddeathbombb 5

Friday 11 May 2012 16:13

Do you have a cat lol

Comments

icallbullshit 3

Friday 11 May 2012 21:10

Big whoop, you farted, you're human.

simonsaysYDI 8

Friday 11 May 2012 21:32

=P Some phones are pretty sensitive. I hear my girlfriends lighter, cars driving by outside, mouse clicks, etc. OP probably just made the fatal mistake of not talking when she let it rip.

izzy7 11

Friday 11 May 2012 21:32

Oh no! You farted! It's the end of the world! I don't even see how this is an FML. YDI

JuuChan 3

Friday 11 May 2012 21:32

Females: Get over it already. Farting is NOT a big deal. It's a natural function of the body and if you're ashamed of it then you have some serious issues. Get. Over. It. Males: Females farting in front of you is NOT the end of the world and it most certainly is not "unnatural." People fart. Get. Over. It.

EmbraceTheOne 2

Friday 11 May 2012 21:36

Or you could of muted the phone, passed gas then unmuted it?

Hiphuray4peas 27

Friday 11 May 2012 21:44

Through out my childhood my family members would blame their toots on the dog... particularly when it happened at the dinner table. We didn't get a dog until I was 18.

Psycho_Babydoll 26

Friday 11 May 2012 21:45

You should have just admitted, laughed it off and moved on. My boyfriend does it all the time. "Did you hear that?" "No." "Oh. Well I farted. Felt good though." He proudly informs me and all is well. Claim those sneaky lil bastards!