Intimacy: Caught in 404pp

Caught in 404pp

By danggit3290 - 03/05/2009 17:17 - United States

Today, I was masturbating in the dark with the door open. I thought I saw a figure outside my door, because I didn't have my glasses on. After intensely staring at the dark figure for about a minute, thinking it was my imagination, my stepdad said, "You know, I'm looking RIGHT at you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 032

You deserved it 89 510

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Same thing different taste

Didn't see you there

By eatmyshipoopie - 18/12/2009 15:20 - United Kingdom

Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend when my dad opened the door. I thought I hadn't been seen because the door was only open a tiny bit. I then looked into the mirror by the door to see my dad's reflection, staring at mine, horrified. I was on top. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 663

You deserved it 10 158

By shelbylove115 - 22/02/2013 05:35 - United States - Nevada City

Today, I walked into my near pitch-black bathroom and saw a person staring back at me. I woke my whole family up with my screams. The person was my reflection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 616

You deserved it 35 193

By Anonymous - 14/03/2012 19:31 - United States

Today, I was masturbating, and out of the corner of my eye I saw a figure. It was my neighbor staring at me through the window with a total look of disgust. I moved in this weekend and hadn't yet introduced myself to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 877

You deserved it 33 087

By haunted - 24/11/2011 20:30 - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking to the kitchen in the dark. Something caught my eye and I turned to see a man standing in the corner, clear as day. I jumped and closed my eyes for a split second. When I opened them, he was nowhere to be seen. I'm now terrified to live in my own home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 632

You deserved it 4 826

By Anonymous - 25/09/2014 15:52 - United States - Red Oak

Today, as I was opening the door for my boyfriend, I pressed my boobs against the glass to make him laugh. I didn't see his dad standing just behind him at first, but he certainly saw me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 393

You deserved it 10 919

By Matti - 17/08/2018 22:00

Today, as I sat on the toilet, I heard a noise outside. I peered through the window and found myself staring directly at my neighbor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 193

You deserved it 241

Late reaction

By fuck - 22/01/2020 14:00 - Canada - Airdrie

Today, I was masturbating in my bedroom, when suddenly, my mom opened the door and walked in with guests. I didn't react quick enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 360

You deserved it 665

By Anonymous - 29/04/2009 23:12 - Canada

Today, I came home from work and went to open the door. I Iooked through the window and saw a man in my house. Terrified, I called the police. They came, searched the house, and found nothing missing. I went back inside and looked through the window and saw him again. It was my reflection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 526

You deserved it 79 371

By Cynical - 30/03/2009 03:49 - United States

Today, I was in my room with the door locked and my mom knocked on the door. I said "don't come in, i'm naked!" She said "That's okay!" so she unlocked the door and walked in. I was masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 95 207

You deserved it 37 101

By Burntintomyretinas - 19/09/2012 04:40 - Australia - Chatswood

Today, I went over to my girlfriend's house. She'd told me not to ring the doorbell and just come in so that I wouldn't wake her dad up. As I walked upstairs, her father walked out of the bathroom naked. We locked eyes. I can't get the image out of my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 846

You deserved it 3 608

instrumentals 0

Sunday 3 May 2009 23:02

holy crap CLOSE THE DOOR.

dantheman931 0

Sunday 3 May 2009 23:04

YDI for not closing the door. On the other hand, FYL for having a stepdad who would stare at you while you're masturbating instead of, I dunno, walking away.

Comments

shyfishy 0

Monday 4 May 2009 19:42

next time lock the door or close it, and is you see/feel anything behind you move, stop. that is some slow reactions

Dorri 0

Monday 4 May 2009 20:33

LMAO. Funniest FML ever. Why the hell didn't you stop? And why the hell did he watch for a MINUTE?!

AnneFTW 17

Monday 4 May 2009 21:03

Haha learn to close and/or lock the door. But why the hell did he stay there silently watching you for a minute...?! Creepy..

kellster 2

Monday 4 May 2009 21:10

Lol, #19! Best comment ever!!

CathXPeters 0

Monday 4 May 2009 21:35

HHHAHAHHAHAHHAHA I LAUGHED SO HARD!

percypigs 0

Monday 4 May 2009 22:00

lol @ #19 (:

Lalalal_fml 0

Monday 4 May 2009 22:12

Sad to say, I can just see this whole thing play out. bahahha You and your dad just staring at each other. "Is that...is that someone standing there or a shadow? I'll just keep on looking at it and touching myself."

fmlfmlfml15 0

Monday 4 May 2009 23:04

after i read "with the door open" i clicked YDI and i wanted to move on to the next FML, but then i read that your step-father was staring at for a whole minute. i think you are both pervs. like father like son.

wow_fmylife 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 0:21

how is he being a perv? masturbation is VERY natural, guys need to do it anyways or else you have backed up sperm and thats what results into wet dreams afteer all that puberty n shit if you dont **********. but OP YDI for not being more careful....close/lock the door. but seriously FYL for your dad not WALKING away once he figured out what you were doing