Awkward and Work: Confused?

Confused?

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, while at my job as a hostess, I was seating a couple and their adorable little girl. I tried to ask how old she was, but what came out was, "Aww, what breed is she?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 177

You deserved it 35 894

Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
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Same thing different taste

What did you just say?

By keeks_25 - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, I was serving a family at the restaurant where I work. When I went to ask the little girl what she wanted, I was tongue-tied and got "cutie" and "hun" mixed up and ended up asking, "What can I get for you, cuntie?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 85 241

You deserved it 26 135

Secret

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of two years has a beautiful daughter. That's cool, except she's one year old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 051

You deserved it 2 887

Snappy

By DamnDogs - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, at work as a groomer's assistant, my boss said something that I didn't catch as I went to take a leash off a dog. I looked at my boss and said, "What?" To which she replied, "Be careful, he bites." I now have a two-inch gash on my finger from a 6lb fluffy Maltese. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 743

You deserved it 5 732

By uninvited - 04/02/2016 15:16 - United States - Boston

Today, my parents called me to ask if I could drop my dog off to them on Sunday. They're having a Superbowl party and want to show her off to their guests. My dog is invited, but I'm not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 261

You deserved it 1 749

Second class citizen

By crapped on - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my family went on vacation. I had to stay home to take care of everyone's animals. I called my mom, who said she was too busy to talk to me. When my sister asked her who was on the phone, she replied, "The dog sitter." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 560

You deserved it 4 261

By Ohwhy - 27/10/2012 11:53 - United Kingdom - Liverpool

Today, as I waited to fly home, a very attractive woman smiled and gestured towards the seat next to me. However, a hyperactive child and his mother barged past into said empty seats. The woman really hit it off with the guy behind, while I was stuck listening to a kid scream at Angry Birds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 492

You deserved it 2 082

By justsomesummer - 26/01/2016 18:09 - United States - Beaverton

Today, I got a new babysitting job. Every time the little girl goes to the bathroom, she screams and cries until I wipe her. She's 7 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 912

You deserved it 1 668

Mommy milk time

By TheLastSerenade - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Australia - Sydney

Today, I saw a woman breastfeeding her child at the local park. That would have been just fine if the child wasn't at least 8 years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 305

You deserved it 4 117

Cheeky

By BurnedByAWaiter - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff

Today, I went on a blind date at a fancy restaurant. My date was running a bit late, so I went ahead and got a table. I got bored, so I decided to ask my waiter how I looked. He stood there, then said that, "It's against company policy to mock customers to their face." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 599

You deserved it 8 453

Not the smartest

By ugh Buck! - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was watching a movie on TV. One of the characters has the same name as my dog, and when his name was called, my dog got so excited that he jumped face-first into my TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 478

You deserved it 4 551

DrDilllonReese 12

Saturday 22 October 2011 1:09

She's an oompa loompa

skata 4

Saturday 22 October 2011 1:09

how do you screw that up?

Comments

puppytaco64 8

Saturday 22 October 2011 1:40

She's a rare breed called the little kid

bizarre_ftw 21

Saturday 22 October 2011 17:17

Extremely dangerous, kill on sight

afulks78 11

Saturday 22 October 2011 1:51

Haha nice one bro

hillbillyboy1993 7

Saturday 22 October 2011 5:05

damn u cute...

afulks78 11

Saturday 22 October 2011 5:57

Thanks babe.

j_cat187 19

Saturday 22 October 2011 10:04

Did 117 say something pedifileish?

JTthePurpleNinja 5

Saturday 22 October 2011 1:53

I'm sorry OP but this was the funniest thing I've read In ages ! :D

zebrapattern 6

Saturday 22 October 2011 1:53

LOLLLLLL WIN

thethatoneguy_21 4

Saturday 22 October 2011 1:57

Hahaha, speak much?

Vegnas 13

Saturday 22 October 2011 1:59

Puppy :D

closenough 0

Saturday 22 October 2011 2:05

close enough!

punkin_26 16

Saturday 22 October 2011 21:53

What...are you announcing your arrival or something?

A_Lopes 3

Saturday 22 October 2011 2:15

Well, you can say bye to that job.

decidedlyvague 11

Saturday 22 October 2011 2:26

This made me laugh. Obviously she's an Ewok.

NDiesal10 2

Saturday 22 October 2011 2:32

How the? Wow. Lmao.

Keywords

Cars Transportation Embarrassing Awkward Work Mental health Relatable AITA Am I overreacting? Social Media Love Annoying Family Intimacy Sex Coworkers Poopoo peepee Dentist Health Sleep Cute Animals Dogs Shopping My ex Cats Job interview Clothes Miscellaneous Weird

The Top

Today, my estranged wife threatened to slit her wrist with a razor blade if I did not send her $50,000. She sent me a picture of her pressing a Gillette Safety razor to her wrist. It looked like she was getting ready to shave her perpetually hairy arms. She never was the sharpest knife in the drawer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 383

You deserved it 77

Today my boyfriend of one year dumped me. When I started crying, he said, “Want to know something that will make you hate me so you won’t be so sad?” and then told me he’s been cheating on me with multiple women, the entire time we’ve been dating. He thought that would comfort me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 605

You deserved it 207

The Top

Today, I woke up to all 4 of my wheels stolen from my car. The thieves were kind enough to leave the car resting on wooden blocks and bricks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 059

You deserved it 2 484

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because of my drunken antics. My reaction? Pour myself a stiff drink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 616

You deserved it 56 931

Today, my girlfriend was flummoxed as to why someone named Renny would be texting her at 1 a.m. Funny, because she used to have “Renny” tattooed on her ass when we met. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 163

You deserved it 190

Today, I was on the bus and a woman got on with her 3 young children. I offered her my seat so they could all sit together. When I went to get off the bus, I realized I'd left my bag underneath my old seat. When I tried to get it back the woman hit me and yelled at me for trying to steal her purse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 779

You deserved it 2 963

Today, I asked my girlfriend to talk dirty to me while I was at work. She did so by telling me she has a yeast infection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 113

You deserved it 473

Today, I got an early Valentine's day card. My boyfriend and I recently broke up, and my hopes shot up thinking it might be from him. It wasn't. It was from my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 219

You deserved it 4 674

Same thing different taste

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