Intimacy: Damper

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Damper

By bleh - 23/11/2009 22:29 - United States

Today, my fiancé and I were fooling around when his foreskin ripped and bled all over the place. After a trip to the emergency room, the doctor told us no sex for six weeks to let it heal. We're getting married and going on our honeymoon in two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 500

You deserved it 6 835

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 06/10/2018 21:00 - United States - Tallahassee

Today, I got to see my fiancé for the first time in 3 months. While we were having sex for the first time, he slipped out and slammed into the back of my vagina, tearing it open. Now I won't stop bleeding, it hurts to pee, and we can't have sex. I won't see him for another 2 months after this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 967

You deserved it 507

Out of order

By HornyWife - 13/06/2020 02:02

Today, I'm on my honeymoon. My husband and I cannot consummate our marriage, because his penis has an open wound due to… vigorous masturbation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 467

You deserved it 367

By Justme - 20/02/2011 12:23 - United States

Today, I had surgery on my "girl parts" and can't have sex for six weeks. My boyfriend sees no need to spend any time with me until I heal up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 468

You deserved it 7 437

By Anonymous - 21/08/2014 21:24 - Portugal - Alg

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to lose our virginity. When he saw blood, he panicked and started crying, convinced that he was bleeding out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 825

You deserved it 6 737

By moerae - 03/10/2018 03:00

Today, I was fooling around with my new girlfriend. I guess she'd never been with an uncircumcised man before, because before I knew it I had a frenulum tear and had to go to the ER. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 932

You deserved it 642

FML Uncensored

By Anonymous - 15/08/2017 06:00

Today, me and my boyfriend had sex but stopped when I felt pain downstairs. That evening he wanted me to go to the emergency room but I wanted to sleep it off. Turned out I needed surgery. One of my fallopian tubes had ripped. The sex was so rough, I got an intravenous hemorrhage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 637

You deserved it 892

By Anonymous - 15/02/2013 23:22 - Venezuela - Barquisimeto

Today, I had to take my fiancé to the hospital so they could remove a tampon applicator that he claimed he somehow "fell onto". It was lodged up his nostril. I'm marrying this man in a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 140

You deserved it 5 142

By Anonymous - 10/12/2013 21:06 - United States - Buffalo

Today, I found out that I am bleeding from my cervix and must refrain from having sex for the next two weeks. My fiancé pointedly asked if my cervix has anything to do with my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 101

You deserved it 11 032

Come again

By Anonymous - 09/07/2009 07:35

Today, I gave my boyfriend a spontaneous blowjob while we were watching TV. After he finished, I tried to pull a sexy move I'd seen in a porno by zipping his pants back up with my teeth. His foreskin got caught in the zipper and we spent the next few hours in the emergency room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 999

You deserved it 62 556

By Anonymous - 08/01/2013 05:20 - United States

Today, I got into an accident on my motorcycle. When I told my wife that the doctor said I couldn't have sex for two weeks, she couldn't contain her joy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 032

You deserved it 8 757

DirtyDiana_fml 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 1:21

lmao damn bitch dont bite.

xMrAndyTranx 4

Tuesday 24 November 2009 1:18

YDI. You scraped his man meat with your teeth. SMFH

Comments

jpest17 5

Friday 1 January 2010 23:10

# 73 suck it up tons of people don't get to deside to live or not but they still get aborted!

dochoc_fml 0

Sunday 10 January 2010 4:45

get that shit circumcised!

martic835 2

Tuesday 12 January 2010 8:43

I bet your boyfriend's shlong smells like fish.

IIKiAII_LogiK 0

Saturday 30 January 2010 3:42

HA.

brittania22 0

Sunday 31 January 2010 5:49

why are there any uncircumcised guys out there? it's nasty unhealthy and gross. that just sucks though.

as566 0

Wednesday 17 February 2010 18:34

@#132, No it's not and no it's not. And yeah, that does suck.

kev08326 1

Tuesday 9 February 2010 13:59

circumcision ftw

ryguy997 0

Thursday 4 March 2010 7:40

this is a repeat fml.

OhDamSucks 0

Sunday 18 April 2010 4:37

dam. that sucks. steroids will help it heel faster

joeyslilcocsukr 0

Friday 16 July 2010 2:39

there are plenty of men who are uncircumcised and have "normal" looking penises

bennyboy111 7

Monday 19 July 2010 15:02

uncircumcised ftw more pleasure even if it does hav more chance of spreading stds use a condom! more an fhl ain't any dirtier if it's washed tha skin underneath is supposed 2 be moist!