Intimacy: Dates that matter

Dates that matter

By mee - 19/02/2012 11:37 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend sang "Happy birthday" to my vagina. It was my birthday last month and he forgot, but he remembers the date of the first time he went down on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 887

You deserved it 4 668

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Same thing different taste

By blower - 11/04/2011 04:01 - United States

Today, my boyfriend actually remembered our anniversary. Not our anniversary of being together, which he forgot last month, but the anniversary of him getting his first blow job from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 855

You deserved it 9 302

Our anniversary

By Anonymous - 27/12/2019 20:00

Today, my boyfriend actually remembered our anniversary. Not our anniversary of being together, which he forgot last month, but the anniversary of him getting his first blowjob from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 498

You deserved it 509

Thanks, babe

By Anonymous - 14/12/2020 17:58 - Canada - Moncton

Today, it’s my birthday. My boyfriend of almost 4 years completely forgot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 956

You deserved it 121

By cek4uytp - 25/06/2011 06:02 - United States

Today, my boyfriend caught me in a lie about being on my period. He memorized my menstrual cycle, but still forgot that today is my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 786

You deserved it 18 612

By zippersaremoreimportantthansentiments - 01/02/2014 08:11 - United States - Montgomery

Today, for our anniversary, I sang my boyfriend a heartfelt, self-written song. The first thing he said when I finished was "Your fly is open." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 150

You deserved it 6 419

By Forgotten - 09/08/2010 14:38 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend forgot our anniversary. But it's okay; I wasn't expecting anything after he forgot my birthday, Valentine's Day, and my name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 251

You deserved it 28 626

By Anonymous - 16/01/2011 02:33 - United States

Today, we were celebrating my birthday and my boyfriend thought it would be funny to shove my face in the cake. While the candles were still lit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 970

You deserved it 3 693

Brain worms

By JaneSimple - 16/08/2020 14:02

Today, my fiancé forgot my birthday. I did however remember to tell him we were sending his mother flowers, for her birthday, which falls a week after mine. We've been together 10 years. I sent her flowers on my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 451

You deserved it 232

By Wawawiwa - 21/07/2010 23:44 - Namibia

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. After removing my underwear, he started singing "In the jungle, the mighty jungle..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 828

You deserved it 53 763

No gifts for you

By Birthdaypoop - 20/06/2022 12:00

Today, it’s my birthday. Not only did my boyfriend of 5 years forget, when I reminded him, he said very unenthusiastically, “Oh, Happy Birthday.” When I said, “That’s it?” he got annoyed and said,“Well, what else do you want me to tell you?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 893

You deserved it 1 255

drawmesunshine 17

Sunday 19 February 2012 19:20

In his defense, he didn't play an active role in your birth, making it harder to remember.

fthislyfe 22

Sunday 19 February 2012 19:24

Still a better love story that twilight

Comments

RedPillSucks 31

Monday 20 February 2012 16:15

He needs to star in his own rendition of "****** Dialogs"

alissaa16 0

Monday 20 February 2012 17:12

Just be happy he remembered a birthday my bf forgot my bday twice...

antwon86 4

Monday 20 February 2012 18:46

Just a little help from your friendly neighborhood troller-man. Also 146 you have no soul.

hateevryone 14

Monday 20 February 2012 19:59

that's kinda sweet, in a way.

jdogthebig 0

Monday 20 February 2012 21:38

How bout i lick ur pussy baby

zionjuggernext 3

Tuesday 21 February 2012 5:03

Happy blow day?

debra123 4

Tuesday 21 February 2012 6:15

That's kinda cute.

debra123 4

Tuesday 21 February 2012 6:15

That's kinda cute.

ChrissyBambi 0

Tuesday 21 February 2012 6:50

Got yourself a winner -.-

A_dreamer_22 3

Tuesday 21 February 2012 12:19

u've put up with that 4 a year now?? u need a real man who cares about u enough to remember something as important as d day u were born!!

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I arrived at a camp and met one of my roommates. At bedtime, I had energy still, so I did push-ups. The guy was asleep or so I thought because he was facing the wall. The guy thought I was jacking off and told everyone I did it in the middle of our room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 863

You deserved it 2 846

Today, I went out with this girl I really liked and she came back to my place. Things were heating up and we ended up having sex. I was on top and really into it but in the middle of it she held up her wrist and said, "Huh, look at the time, I gotta get home." She wasn't wearing a watch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 743

You deserved it 17 913

The Top

Today, I came home to find out my roommate had sex in my bed, because he didn't want his date to know he has a smaller bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 040

You deserved it 149

Today, I was first in line at a stoplight. After five minutes, with a line of cars behind me, the light was still red. People behind me started honking, so I decided to just go. Halfway across the way, I was greeted by a camera flash. Nobody else went. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 629

You deserved it 55 061

Today, I decided to hang my $200 cocktail dress outside for faster drying after hand washing it. I learned that it dries much faster when torn into several pieces, courtesy a stray dog that randomly appeared at my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 943

You deserved it 5 166

Today, at work where I'm a physiotherapist, I was helping a patient with lower back pain. While I was massaging him, he shat himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 076

You deserved it 130

Today, Facebook showed me pictures from five years of a happy time I had traveling with a boyfriend, who later ended our 8-year relationship by telling me he had gotten an apartment and furniture in secret, and was moving out. No warning, no reason, no explanation. He never spoke to me again. I loved him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 883

You deserved it 224

Today, my live-in girlfriend and I broke up. She told me she can't leave because she has nowhere to go. I'm stuck with her until she finds a job and an apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 986

You deserved it 10 713