Sex, Awkward, Painting and Love: Dry

Dry

By moresexperience - 11/09/2009 12:26 - United States

Today, I had dinner with my girlfriend of five months along with my mom and dad. It all was going fine until my mom asked aloud, "Everything going smooth for you in the bedroom?" to which my girlfriend replied, "No." I'd actually been painting the master bedroom at my parent's house for some extra cash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 476

You deserved it 4 309

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Same thing different taste

Caught in 4K

By Anonymous - 22/03/2009 13:04 - Malta

Today, my parents were out so I invited my girlfriend over. It was the afternoon, and things started to heat up. We were having sex, and I was about to finish. Then I looked through the window, to see a construction worker (who was fixing the house next to mine) giving me a thumbs up. He's her dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196 733

You deserved it 34 731

Tense dinner

By bittenbyadonkey - 28/01/2011 17:23 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my family. Everything went well until my mum started hitting the brandy. While kicked back in her chair, she asked my boyfriend how satisfactory I was in bed, and if he enjoyed going down on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 284

You deserved it 3 581

Hiya!

By mal - 08/05/2012 20:46 - United Kingdom - Chelmsford

Today, I brought my girlfriend home while my parents were at work, and things got a little heated. We lost track of time, because the next thing we knew, my dad burst into the living room. He doubled over laughing and asked how much I paid her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 253

You deserved it 6 282

By sometingwong - 01/12/2011 20:32 - United States

Today, I had dinner at my girlfriend's house with her parents. Everything was going great, until after dinner when her dad pulled me aside and told me he'd heard us having sex. I was out of town all weekend for a baseball tournament. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 401

You deserved it 3 451

By fmjob - 21/07/2009 04:39 - Canada

Today, I finally told my parents I would be changing bedrooms because I could no longer stand hearing them having sex, which is awkward and disturbing. Later, my dad came and asked me quietly if I thought my mom sounded "satisfied." FML

I agree, your life sucks 90 308

You deserved it 6 253

Handy

By Anonymous - 06/03/2011 18:15 - Sweden

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a handjob in the shower. As I was reaching climax, my mom walked by the bathroom door and started talking to me. My girlfriend didn't stop, and in order to distract from the situation at hand, I had to carry on the conversation with my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 918

You deserved it 11 997

By Anonymous - 13/06/2014 09:27 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I had dinner for the first time with my boyfriend's parents. It was awkward enough without his mom asking, "So, what do you do for fun, besides my son?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 765

You deserved it 6 148

Not now, guys

By Sonofa - 17/05/2013 15:52 - Canada - Cold Lake

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 247

You deserved it 3 810

Scolded

By oopsies - 08/01/2010 01:07 - United States

Today, after having sexual intercourse with my boyfriend, we went downstairs to find his parents had come home early and had heard everything. I then received a long scolding from his mother of how I'd disrespected her house. My boyfriend received a high-five and a thumbs-up from his dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 060

You deserved it 5 472

By saddened97 - 20/01/2011 09:39 - Australia

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend and he was fingering me. After he left, my mum says to me "I wish my sex life was as interesting as yours." She had walked in and we hadn't even noticed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 717

You deserved it 12 903

boone_fml 0

Friday 11 September 2009 19:54

Try communicating with your girlfriend about how you can take her to the bone zone. It doesn't matter what your mom was talking about. If she's not happy she's not happy.

llllllllllllllll_fml 0

Friday 11 September 2009 20:31

she is dumb. who would answer that question?

Comments

plexico 3

Friday 11 September 2009 22:12

She should have said, "Hell, no! It's going rough, real rough, just the way I like it. Thanks for raising a wild beast, lady."

Casualt1234 0

Friday 11 September 2009 22:48

a globetrotter always save the good sex til the final two minutes

DeathShad0 1

Friday 11 September 2009 22:42

Solution: Fix it.

A2G_fml 0

Friday 11 September 2009 22:57

YDI for not being good and having a girl that would talk to your parents about that

baritone1whs07 1

Friday 11 September 2009 23:26

maybe she should pay more attention to the convo. or if it sounds like a weird question to ask dont answer or ask what do you mean

lolololcheese 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 0:11

******* IDIOTS who didn't understand...............

longboat 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 0:39

I would hate to9 have parents like that who don't know what the **** they're talking about.

shudder_glasses 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 2:01

this is where the pronoun y'all comes in handy

GriefBacon 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 7:53

Sorry....what is the significance here? A play on words? A har har de har har that I am supposed to give you? No. No... I don't get it.

MarcFirewing 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 10:47

... *facepalm* that's all I have to say.

friscobuff 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 12:19

YDI FOR STILL LIVING WITH YOUR PARENTS!

ashj 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 15:41

Except... it doesn't sound like he is? "I was painting the master bedroom at my PARENT'S house for some extra cash." Even if he was living with them, how does that mean he deserved it? He may be too young to have his own place, and even if he's not - it's still not relevant.